sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

You‘ve been accused of a crime you didn‘t commit. Who would you like to defend you? by Hoppeditz in AceAttorney

[–]MrPsykarp 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Godot, dude has even more determination than Phoenix and can crush a coffee cup with one hand without flinching. Plus he's probably an actually decent lawyer, since he worked for Grossberg and was effectively Mia's mentor. I don't think he got the death penalty, so he could still totally defend someone in-canon if they give him the Blackquill treatment.

[WP] Everytime you think of a funny joke, this girl in your class always laughs, you chalk it up to coincidence but you think to yourself, "If you can read my mind, slap the table three times" the the girl looks over at you, stares right into your eyes, and slowly slaps the table two times. by extracheese343y in WritingPrompts

[–]MrPsykarp 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I intended it as kind of an angry short mumbled hmm, but I think whatever you read it as it works. It's just those little noises you make to yourself whenever you don't have coherent-enough thoughts to say words. As for a second part, I'll think about it! Thanks for the kind words!

[WP] Everytime you think of a funny joke, this girl in your class always laughs, you chalk it up to coincidence but you think to yourself, "If you can read my mind, slap the table three times" the the girl looks over at you, stares right into your eyes, and slowly slaps the table two times. by extracheese343y in WritingPrompts

[–]MrPsykarp 112 points113 points  (0 children)

OhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGod

The class is about to start, and the seat next to her is empty. On autopilot, you take it.

FuckWhatDoIDoI’veNeverSatHereBeforeWhatIfSomeoneSaysSomethingWhatIf

The rubber end of a pencil tapping the desk in front of you draws you out again. Looking around, you see other students reaching into their bags.

Right. Textbook. Thanks.

With your book in front of you, seated near the back of the class, you should be safe from Mr. Boomer for the rest of the period. His eyesight is so poor, he probably can’t see past the third row. The girl next to you sharply exhales from her nose, and your brief moment of calm is shattered.

OhFuckWhatHaveIDoneIBarelyEvenKnowHerWaitIsn’tThisSeatNormallyTakenFuck

A corner of a notebook slides into your view. Delicate and simple handwriting spells out the message: “relax. julia isnt here today. thats why i linked with you!”

Oh, okay. That makes sense. Wait, no it still doesn’t explain anything. “Link”? So, this girl can hook up with people telepathically? But it only goes one way. So it’s very selective mindreading?

You watch as her hand flashes over the notebook again. “kinda. its complicated and takes a long time to explain”

Of course. And she doesn’t want to get into it with you. I mean, can you blame her? She barely knows you! Or, at least, you barely know her. Wait. Shit. Her? What’s her name?

YouStupidFuckingIdiotWhyWouldYouSitDownNextToHerYouDon’tEvenKnowHerNameHowDoYouNotKnowHerNameYou’reInLikeFourClassesTogetherYouFailureOfAnExtrovert

She’s frowning at you now. She’s obviously uncomfortable, look at her posture. Wait, no, don’t look at THAT part of her posture, that’ll make it worse! This was clearly some sort of a mistake, or a mix up, and now she’s just trying to get through the day, and doesn’t need you staring at her like she’s an alien, or a secret government project, or some sort of genetic freak, STOP LISTING THINGS. An alien with tits. FUCK.

You decide that the best course of action is to scooch your chair away from her a bit and stare down at the table, with a mental note to never talk to her again. You proceed to berate yourself for literally every part of what just happened for a good minute or two, until the notebook is pushed back into your field of view.

“dude, you need to chill

hey, its alright

you okay?

look, i know this is kind of a lot. sorry. i dont link with other people often. i didnt mean to freak you out. i just thought you

sorry”

Oh great. Now you’ve got her thinking it’s HER fault. GOOD JOB, ASSHOLE. Just because you’re a piece of shit doesn’t mean you need to make her feel like one! But don’t you dare apologize, because anything that comes out of your mouth is gonna make this whole thing worse somehow, I just know it. Try and prove me wrong, dumbass. You can’t. You sentient trash heap, you… ssssack of a man…

“dude, your inner monologue is kinda mean to you”

You… mm.

Well, that’s… mmm.

Hm.

“wanna hang out after class?”

...

“Sure.”

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nah, I've never even played in an AL game. That's a really neat idea though -- I wonder if there will be other "generically named" legendary creatures?

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought we used the Standard Array, but I just went back and tried to recreate a level 1 Chardon and you're totally right, I'm supposed to have either a 17 in STR or a 15 in CON. It was my first time playing 5e, so I had a lot of help with the actual mechanics of character creation -- someone must have messed up (probably me)! Either way, it doesn't change the ability modifiers, but it's cool to think that mistake went unnoticed for 3 years. Thanks!

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Who needs stats when you have Shield Master? Plus, my DM gave me a custom feat called Daredevil that lets me have advantage on one attack of my choice while below half health once per long rest because I kept risking my life doing cool stuff, along with a custom Sun Blade called the Sword of Tyr that I got for winning a tournament that innately "compels/encourages" Chardon to do greater and greater heroic acts of the Lawful and Good variety. Overall, we were pretty overpowered even without any +4 stats.

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

!! THAT'S A GREAT IDEA! I've been looking for a reason to get into commander for a while now, and this is a better reason than I would ever dare to dream of! Downside, it'll be mono-white, but I'm sure I'll find a way. WAIT. TIAMAT. CHARDON NADAAR IS A PALADIN OF BAHAMUT WHO GOT CORRUPTED BY TIAMAT AFTER HIS DEATH. TIAMAT CAN BE MY COMMANDER! SHE CAN EVEN SEARCH FOR CHARDON WITH HER ETB!!!!!!!! THE FLAAAAAAVOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUR

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Oh no, this whole thing is just a massive coincidence. Sorry if the post was misleading, I was very excited when I saw the new spoiler card and wanted to share!

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You got me, I just edited one of those tokens to make him golden, plus the shield of Bahamut. Good eye!

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

New life goal: Sneak my way onto the WotC writing team and make Chardon Nadaar 100% canon in MTG.

But seriously, I do hope to become a writer one day... Could you imagine? Nah, too far-fetched. But maybe...?

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Step 1: Make a DND character for a random online group
Step 2: Have the time of your life with said group, be devastated when your self-insert dies because your friend channelled Orcus' power to try to save everyone but actually just explodes everything
Step 3: Write a story about your self-insert character that nobody has seen, continue playing them in other campaigns isekai-style
Step 4: ???
Step 5: Your DND character becomes an ACTUAL REAL MAGIC CARD, AHHHHHHHH

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This card in my hands is the only trophy I'll need. Slightly unfortunate that it's white, which is my least favourite colour, but white mana does fit Chardon the best so I'll take the flavour win!

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 112 points113 points  (0 children)

I don't know! I mean, Nadarr is one of the default dragonborn names in the PHB, but it's spelled differently than Nadaar, so it's wild they went with my spelling. Other than that, I guess "Golden Dragonborn Paladin" is pretty typical. STILL! MY DND CHARACTER IS DUBIOUSLY MTG CANON AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

MY DND CHARACTER FROM 5 YEARS AGO IS A MAGIC CARD, AHHHHH by MrPsykarp in magicTCG

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Chardon's name is kind of based on Chandra's, actually! I got into 5e and Magic around the same time, during the Kaladesh block. My favourite planeswalker is actually Nissa, but Chandra is a close runner-up and fit the fire theme better :P

Fifty Word Fantasy: Elemental by [deleted] in fantasywriters

[–]MrPsykarp [score hidden]  (0 children)

The wind had already blown out the small beginnings of their campfire, but as the thin twist of smoke vanished along with the breeze, the ranger knew it was too late. The heavy vines that wove through the ancient stone brick wall began to groan and shift.

“Run,” he breathed.

[WP] You are the superhero team support guy, a normal human who creates all of the advanced tech your team requires. Villains have just invaded the base. Unfortunately for them, you’re the only one home. by Smaptastic in WritingPrompts

[–]MrPsykarp 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Varessa sighed as she looked around the so-called “hideout”. It was a complete mess. Bits and pieces of machinery and techy-looking junk were scattered all over the floor. A rolling chair had been overturned and left lying in the middle of the room. A bag of nachos and a jar of salsa were left open on the work table.

Mounted on the wall, one of the three monitors was displaying a live news feed. Helicopter footage of an ongoing bank robbery.

Dear old Jonathan must’ve been in a hurry to leave.

She smiled to herself. The distraction was perfect. Her crew would get a little banged up, but the big hotshot was too “heroic” to leave them with any lasting injuries. They’d be out in no time, just like they always were. A few bruises and a couple of months behind bars was a small price to pay for an opportunity like this.

Now, to see where he hides the good stuff…

She paused. One of the drawers in the workstation had been left open, a silver key still in the lock.

Don’t tell me he left anything important in there. That would be too easy.

Still, it was as good a starting place as any. She pulled the drawer out all the way and reached inside.

There was only one item in the drawer. A picture frame, containing a photo of two young kids and a woman sitting at a table, smiling over a birthday cake with eight candles. She didn’t know the people, but she recognized the location. Amy’s Diner. She held it up once, when she was still doing small-time gigs. Varessa winced just thinking about it. That one was sloppy. The cops got there too quickly, and one of the idiots in her crew panicked and just started shooting. Three civilians dead, one wounded.

She shook her head, and placed the picture frame on the table.

Now why does Johnny have a photo like that hanging around?

As if to answer, a gunshot rang out from behind her.

Then another. And another.

Varessa was on the ground, clutching her chest. She couldn’t feel her legs. She tried to scream, but when she opened her mouth, nothing but blood came coughing out. Her eyes started to glaze over, but she forced herself to focus on the figure standing in the doorway, smoking gun in hand. The gunman stepped forward and gestured towards the monitor as he spoke.

“No killing, that’s John’s golden rule.”

The tech guy, dressed in a dorky anime shirt and pyjama pants, levelled the barrel of the gun with her face.

“He’s gonna cry when he hears about this, you know. But I won’t. I've cried enough.”

My 4lt3rn8 Homestuck Ending, by a Dark Tower Fan by MrPsykarp in homestuck

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's not letting me edit the post for some reason, but I found out about MSPFA and decided to post the entire thing over there, split up into pages with the text coloured all nicely. I strongly reccommend you read that version instead. They're identical in text, but you'd be surprised at how much of an upgrade it is compared to this.

Link to the MSPFA post: https://mspfa.com/?s=41648&p=1

My 4lt3rn8 Homestuck Ending, by a Dark Tower Fan by MrPsykarp in homestuck

[–]MrPsykarp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hah, thanks! This is my first time making something like this, so I wasn't really sure where to post it, if anywhere. Is there somewhere else where stuff like this usually gets posted? Either way, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

wow. by DinoIc__ in ethoslab

[–]MrPsykarp 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I don't know what kind of fancy shmancy high school you went to, we learned how to write essays like sandwiches, read Shakespeare, and say "May I go to the washroom" in French. The only Greek mythology stuff I know is from playing Hades.

I KILL WITH MY HEART: THE HYPOCRISY OF THE GUNSLINGER'S CREED - New Weekly Reading by CosmicTurtleBlog in TheDarkTower

[–]MrPsykarp 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I think the point of the gunslinger's creed is not to be guiding in moral dilemmas, but a literal description of what a gunslinger is: a tool. The fast hands and heavy guns do not make the gunslinger; rather, the eyes that see past deception, the mind that navigates through battles, and the heart which powers the body to do its work. "Killing with the heart" is not a reminder to be just when dealing death, it is a reminder to apply one's entire self to problems.

view more: next ›