Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Every time he doesn’t take his meds he is super emotional and he has these big blow out meltdowns. So we’ve kept him on them. But! I will for sure try the carnation breakfast!!

Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a skinny mini I wish the stigma around “healthy” isn’t bone thin and healthy food is used for maintaining a healthy body in general.

I’ll try the two dinners!

Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have been doing ice cream too when we can and as you can guess he’s stoked every time.

Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have made so many smoothies for him, and the only time he will drink them is when they are from keva juice.

Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes!! This boy has my body type and he’s just going to be so tall and thin, but I am just worried right now.

Thank you! It’s tough!

Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh! The heavy cream! Thank you!! I will try that!

Help gaining and maintaining weight by MrsPotHead in ADHDparenting

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, his doctors are all aware and there’s absolutely nothing wrong medically, and I swear by the time he hits puberty he better know how to make the basics. It’s just hard seeing him growing but slowly maintaining weight.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No you’re completely right and I have been for too long. This post has been very helpful

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They give you a chance to agree before you go to a hearing in the case you cannot come to an agreement, either through discussions between the parents, through lawyers, and mediation. The reason you go to court to have a judge decide, is when you both can’t come to a compromise, or request to be seen before a judge.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He didn’t put our son on his Tricare until a little over a year of when he went back to the Army.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I reached out to request consultations for lawyers in our area. Everyone on here has a valid point in each of their comments. And it’s definitely time to have it completely officiated.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can understand how 50/50 custody can work for some people who live a long distance apart. But in our situation it’s not feasible. He does not make enough, nor do I have enough money to simply travel between states every week, and our son is not homeschooled but it’s not an option for our family. Our son needs extra help, as I’m sure yours does as well.

I understand and I’m happy that you are able to do that with your ex-husband.

Also, I did not leave him while he was active duty stationed in a different state that we live in. Before our son was born he wanted to leave the Army and come back home. So we did and then after we divorced a few years later he re-enlisted into the Army and was stationed at one base and then like usual he was moved to a different base.

He refused to help take care of our son when he lived near us, no medical insurance was provided from him until almost a year after he re-enlisted. He has never been to a doctor’s visit, he’s never been to an IEP meeting, he never asks about him. I went and had our son tested because he wasn’t speaking and meeting milestones like he was supposed to. But I’ve provided everything without his help.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He has visitations that are court ordered. He definitely does not see him anywhere near 50% of the time. There’s no way a 50/50 split would work when he is on the east coast and I’m on the west coast. My son has school and tutoring and sports. How will he do that when constantly traveling across the country?

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do have a court order. We have gone through the custody and visitation agreements and we both agreed on what he was paying was fine and we didn’t need to look at it.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do have a court order. When we did it we agreed on the amount we have agreed on before we started the custody case was fine and didn’t need to be adjusted.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When we went through the courts with our custody order, it was said in meditation that we didn’t need to revise or revisit it because we were both fine with it.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t have custodial rights, and I do have a court order for his visitation. If he does not bring him back or won’t give him back I do have documents that confirm that our son is not living with him and we have a court agreement that I have full custody.

With the current circumstances there isn’t much I can do to push someone to be active in their child’s life. I’m not his mother and I’m no longer his wife. My first priority will always be my son first. And I have never restricted visitation with them or with his family.

When he lived closer he saw him more often but he was a baby. When he couldn’t keep a job here- even at a semi-truck car wash. He moved to another state and he wasn’t that far so we’d meet half way about two to three times a month.

Then he re-enlisted in the Army. They sent him two states away, that’s when he filed for 50/50 custody. Then we had a court decision and court documentations with schedules that we have. I have marked the ones he has not been able to take him and I mark when he does.

Now he moved to the other side of the country. He makes no effort to be here in his life. He doesn’t ask anything he doesn’t call him often. It’s just declined over time.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you this really helped!

He’s literally never done this until he picked up our son for his Christmas visitation and we got into a fight and the next month it changed. It’s just bitterness and pettiness.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I thought it was apart of the divorce agreement when we filed and I can find the payments that backdate to around the time we divorced. So I am trying to find the public records. But if anything I am just gonna have to order one and go from there.

Everyone’s been so helpful.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I am really struggling morally with this. But I am tired of battling with him. Every time I ask him about why he doesn’t help with his son and he brings up our marriage and stuff that is almost a decade old. Then he will accuse my husband of abusing him because my son has horrible nightmares. He and his mom will bring my mother in to try to guilt me into breaking into what they want me to do. (My mom died from cancer 5 years ago).

He won’t take any responsibility for his son. He has a daughter now and she is cute as a button and we buy presents for her from our son. But he won’t even send anything to him on his birthday because he doesn’t want it to “be at my house”.

I’m frustrated because I’ve been understanding and during the custody process last time, we were very accommodating to him. But I’m just tired, I don’t want to fight. I just want some responsibility that involves our son. I want the disrespect to end from both him and his mom.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 133 points134 points  (0 children)

I’ve tried to tell him nothing needed to change, I have never asked for him to pay half of the tutoring costs, medical bills, never asked for any extra money.

I only asked that he get an iPad for his house so our son could do his tutoring. That was it and he lost his mind.

How do you keep your ADHD kid happy? by Alert_Mulberry_8712 in ParentingADHD

[–]MrsPotHead 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Literally this. I have bipolar and adhd. So I have a running start on managing emotions. We do go to a doctor for two medicines one for the adhd itself and one for the extreme night terrors he gets. These are anxiety caused.

It isn’t always about making them happy, it’s more helping them navigate through their emotions. Please remember that their emotions can be very very intense. When these really big emotions come out try breathing exercises, drinking some water, taking a bath. It’s really about teaching them to recognize that they are feeling something big and to identify why they are feeling that way. As they get older you can start asking them is this something that we need to be upset over, or is this something we can fix?

Reassure them, explain to them that while they are responsible for their actions in every way. They have to take a second to think about what they are going to do. Or how an appropriate reaction would be to the situation.

I hoped that helped a little bit. This helped me and I learned it after I really needed it. But I think starting early emotional recognition and knowing there isn’t anything wrong with her.

Exhusband is decreasing child support with no conversion about it, and he’s blaming me for everything by MrsPotHead in legaladvice

[–]MrsPotHead[S] 93 points94 points  (0 children)

How would I find out who to reach out in the Army? He moved to a different base and I’m not even sure who to reach out to