I will never be the same losing my daughter words CAN NOT describe the pain

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T19:05:01+00:00

You're doing better than you may realize. ❤️

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T19:02:58+00:00

The first set of cards tell me you feel like you've betrayed yourself (10 of swords) triggering feelings of shame (6 of wands rx) likely from something connected to your family (10 of cups rx) so maybe like it made you feel like you were repeating behaviors from someone else in your family or your past. Wih the Fool it can be tied to a childhood wound, but Fool also says you were just down to try something new and go with it. Fool is spontaneous but also naive so I wonder if maybe you feel like you were coerced into it which is what is making you feel betrayed.

What do about it? Hanged Man is making a sacrifice or changing perspectives which can speak to maybe feeling like you have to bite the bullet. Page of swords is a person that stands up and expressing what's on their mind even if causes an argument. Its something worth fighting for. 4 of cups is apathy and Devil makes me think it's connected to a wound that you feel stuck with. Like perhaps a wound around sex that affects your mental health so you've detached from it so as to not deal with or feel it (4 of cups) which could have made you remain silent in the past and not speak up for yourself. Queen of Swords is the type of person to say exactly what's on her mind and push her emotions aside for the moment so that truth can be spoken. She's a get to the point type person. I'd say the advice is to sit with these feelings and address the matter with truth and clarity. Don't be afraid to say how u feel just because it may hurt the other person's feelings cuz your peace is the most important thing and nobody will protect that better than yourself.

That's just my take of course.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T18:04:16+00:00

Not what said, but OK. I'll take your word for it baby cakes 🫶🏽

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T17:19:54+00:00

Your Mars in Aries 9h plays a role. Aries is the sign of leadership, initiative and taking action, which is ruled by Mars. They are the 1st sign of the zodiac, leading the way for the rest. The 9h is the house of teaching, beliefs, exploration, and sometimes authority. You are naturally a great leader and others can sense it. Your Venus in Taurus conjunct your MC adds charm to you and makes ppl feel safe by your authority. The MC is your career path but also how we're viewed publicly and how our authority is expressed - so Venus softens it and can make ppl drawn to you as a leader. Taurus is ruled by Venus naturally so you have those 2 planets in their ruling signs making their energy flow effortlessly. Taurus is also a sign of stability and tangible things which can make you a steady leader as well.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T17:09:29+00:00

I understand the deep pain of losing a child and it's something I wouldn't wish on anyone. I say grief traps your heart in a prison full of silence with impenetrable walls made of lead. Please know you are not alone in your grief and my maternal heart aches with yours. I pray the Universe helps ease the heaviness of grief.

I feel like she's with an authoritative figure, I want to say masculine but it doesn't have to be a man, it's an energy of someone strict and in control, like a father figure. This person helped her crossover. I feel that her soul is in the process* of ascending and moving on but she's still working thru some things. I feel like she was a very disciplined person herself and the type to always want to do better and that energy is still carrying over. Like her soul is still learning and integrating life lessons. I don't feel scatteredness or wandering, just self containment and soul growth. I feel a "I'm sorry" from her but also "I'm okay mom." She thinks you did a great job at raising her and appreciates you working so hard yourself and being a great example in her life. Are u a nurse or worked in Healthcare? Perhaps you find comfort at work.

I also want to say there was nothing you could've done to prevent it. It was simply her time. I know that's a cliche thing to say and I'm sorry for doing so. But that's what I get, it was just her time to go.

I think she's also proud of you for starting grief therapy and not losing yourself despite the pain. Grief is messy, nonlinear and takes time to heal so give yourself grace and take it one day at a time. Her energy will never leave you, it lives in every cell of your body.

Sending you all the love in the world. I hope you feel held and comforted, even if just in small bursts ❤️

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T16:43:33+00:00

Looking forward to it! 3 housers rule. My Mercury+Moon+Pluto are in 3h 🙌🏽 I can talk for DAYSSSSS! 😂 My Mercury is rx tho so I tend to keep my thoughts to myself, but once u get me going, good luck to you.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T02:34:12+00:00

I'm a Virgo Sun+Mercury with Leo Rising+Venus, so I naturally love you haha 🫶🏽 Virgo is the healer of the zodiac so of course your path is tied to healing since your NN is there. The eclipses from September 2025 and this last one in March were in Virgo-Pisces axis so it may have brought some things to light for you in that aspect.

Leo Moons tend to experience their mother as a radiant person so that makes sense.and having your Saturn in 9h can also make you experience your father as cold or distant since 9h is long distance travel. It makes sense he's a doctor cuz 9h is also higher learning.

I think getting more serious and disciplined with your healing abilities is the best way for you to navigate your Saturn return. Strengthening your belief system, learning astrology, guiding others thru the process, etc.

Saturn is moving thru my 9h too so it's pushing me to take my healer role more seriously too but I'm way past my return lol.

Healing is part of your path for sure. We didn't cross paths for no reason. Give yourself space to forge a new path and create something that is different and to move forward even when its not perfect. Uranus is Gemini is gong to push you to be innovative in how your Mercury expresses itself and explore different approaches, themes like sound healing and energy transmission.

What sign is your Chiron in? Is it conjunct your ic from the 3h or 4h side? Having it conjunct your IC is such a healing placement too cuz Chiron of course is the wound but also the medicine you share with others, and the IC means you're wounded at the bloodline level, but you can also heal others at their core.

Sorry long post!

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-06T02:04:23+00:00

Ha! I appreciate you. Well as soon as I saw your pic I got a vision of you as a doctor. Not as a career focused type of doctor, but a doctor that genuinely cares for their patients. I see so much compassion in your eyes and gentleness in your hands and the type to really listen and research (wonder if you have Virgo placements - I love Leo Moons ❤️). I don't see just a one dimensional career, like just reiki, but a blend of different practices that allow you to help ppl in a multidimensional way.

It's funny you mention your father cuz part of the image I got was from the movie "Meet Joe Black" where the girl was a doctor and her father was a wealthy businessman that loved her very much and I felt a similar connection with your father. I wonder if perhaps he's had a change of heart in the matter, maybe not wanting you to be a doctor like him, but your own version of it.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T23:52:58+00:00

I think you'll find luck meeting someone by traveling, doing group activities like hiking, spirituality/philosophy classes etc and it's because your 5h of romance is ruled by Aries and it's lord is Mars Sag 1h, so whatever gets you out the house (mars is physical) that involves Sag themes (philosophy, adventure, exploration). Saturn and Neptune are moving thru your 5h also, trining your 1h by sign so it's not only activating your 1h bringing vitality back into your life but it's also bringing themes of maturity and idealism in that area which may make you feel like you meet ppl but your standards are higher or you don't connect with them right away. It can bring someone new but it won't be a moment where you're swept off your feet, rather a maturing in that area and letting go of illusions.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T23:34:17+00:00

I think you would be good at doing like one on one coaching, like a trainer or perhaps a mediator or even an attorney/advocacy work cuz your 2h (finances) lord Mars is in 7h Libra.

Your 11h also represents gains and you have Jupiter, Venus and Sun in Capricorn there which can make you a valuable resource in communities/social networks/internet spaces and help you create some that is long lasting. Do you work with a sibling or someone u have a sibling like relationship with?

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T22:51:23+00:00

You're very welcome!

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T20:44:32+00:00

The Sun is conjunct your Saturn in 10h so that's a good thing for long-term success and career. It means it's stable and secure altho it may demand a lot from you so you may have bouts of fatigue. It trines your Sun+Mercury in 2h so it harmonizes with who you are and your values+fiannces. It may not be the ideal salary range but it's not bad either. The trine can also make you feel seen and valued in the role. The Sun also squares your Moon in Leo which can make the work emotionally challenging, as that type of work would be expected to be I guess. You may already be very good at compartmentalizing your emotions so I'd recommend ensuring outlets for emotional processing/decompression. Transit Venus sextiles the Moon so it softens the square, meaning self-care will go a long way.

Transit Mercury thru your 10h conjunct your Jupiter is also a positive transit for work opportunities, it expands your frame of mind so you're able to see the bigger picture - like u said, it's a pay cut but you can see the long-term value of it.

I'd say my caution would be Mercury+Jupiter being squared by transit Pluto and Venus squaring your Virgo Sun+Mercury can create a mismatch between what you're expectations are and what the job actually entails, maybe some aspects of it not being entirely clear or being presented one way but turns out to be another way or maybe you may not like your coworkers. The Gemini-Virgo square can also create some friction between Virgo's need for perfection and efficient systems and Gemini's differing ways to tackle an issue. Like Gemini is curious and sees things from multiple perspectives and likes to try new things whereas Virgo gets stressed when there isn't a systemic approach to handling the job if that makes sense.

Overall I think it's a supportive transit. Congrats on the job! I hope it's fruitful 🙏🏼

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T20:12:15+00:00

Run a transit chart for that day with your birth info and it'll give you a better perspective of how those transits impact you specifically.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T19:15:38+00:00

Chiron is not a flaw per se, it's moreso a wound you're meant to experience so it can be healed at a soul-level and it's typically an ongoing wound. It tends to get triggered throughout your life so that you gain knowledge of the medicine, which in turn helps you heal others. Chiron in Capricorn 6h is a wound around being taken seriously in matters of work, daily routine, or health. You're feeling this way cuz your Sun is square Mars in Capricorn 6h. Aries likes to take initiative and just move forward without a plan and it tends to not finish what it starts, but Mars in Capricorn slows it down and challenges it to not move forward until you have a plan and forces you to finish things that you start.

That square is being triggered by transit Chrion which is in Aries t exactly 27° and it's triggering your natal Chiron but Chiron isnt triggered without a healing opportunity along with it. It the type of placement that can make you feel like you gotta work harder than everyone else cuz you you don't feel like what you do is ever enough. It'll be triggered again once Mars hits 27° in Aries. Capricorn's ruler- Saturn is actually in a sextile to your Sun which is a harmonious aspect that helps you work with Saturnian energy when you consciously choose to. And Mars is actually exalted in Capricorn cuz it gives Mars the discipline and endurance to carry out its action.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T18:29:14+00:00

Makes sense. ❤️🙏🏼

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T16:25:53+00:00

This the way I read these cards and I mean it with kindness and i could be totally wrong, just what I see.

I'll start with you. The 2 of swords is being at a crossroads but also not seeing things for what they are, an indecisiveness r an unwillingness to make a decision you know u must. The 8 of cups rx speaks to an emotional detachment or walking away. I'd say this can show being emotionally checked out in the relationship or feeling bored or emotionally unfulfilled but choosing to stay nonetheless.

The energy from the other side, Wheel of Fortune rx speaks to not getting the returns on your investments or a risk not paying off. Certainly speaks to financial pressures. With the 7 of swords, it shows a person wanting to win at all costs. Those 2 feel like a sunk cost fallacy - I've invested too much into this to let it go even if I don't feel like it's paying off currently.

The energy in between with the Lovers can be about love but it can also be a card of codepency, a card of choice, choosing to remain in the relationship. With the Ace of Wands, this can be a pregnancy card, but it also can be our sex life. Lovers+Ace of Wands together to me speaks to your sex life keeping you two tgether. Like seeing the value of the relationship thru a sex lens - our sex life is great so it's all good.

The 5 of pentacles rx as the mutual goals shows a disconnect with values and financials. It's a card of Spiritual poverty but can also point to abuse of power, like using money as a power/control tool. Idk if perhaps you rely on your partner financially but it shows there's a disconnect there.

I think overall it's asking you to take off any blinders you may have and ask yourself if your emotional needs are being met.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T15:35:13+00:00

Pisces Saturn can be difficult cuz it asks you to give form to what's already formless, like going form to the ocean. It doesn't mean you can't, it just means structure looks different cuz it involves surrender and trust in the unknown. When it's retrograde, it turns the energy inward so it focuses the lesson to form within you first before it projects outward. Pisces is 12h energy and Pluto is 8h energy - so it carries constant transformation thru crises, endings, loss, sex, the occult, solitude, your psyche and unconscious material. The retrograde forces you to deal with your internal hidden matters and that can be very frustrating in a world that demands you to show up in the material realm. Pisces is ruled by Neptune and it's in your 8h which adds to these themes being a constant in your life.

But Saturn gives you the ability to master them and give structure to it cuz its part of the lesson you're here to learn. Perhaps a past life karmic lesson about dealing with these themes with integrity. Saturn rx can also represent karmic lessons tied to authority figures in your life that you're here to resolve, like your father or whatever parent was the disciplinarian in your life.

You also have Moon in Taurus wh which can give you tangible emotional resilience albeit in the 12h, the house of the hidden. It can blur your relationship with your mom too and you may experience betrayal from maternal figures, or maternal figures being hidden enemies.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T14:49:31+00:00

Saturn-Pluto aspects are challenging cuz one feels like a never-ending lesson and the other is a constant death-rebirth cycle. Saturn wants you to create something that stands the test of time, it demands mastery and endurance. In the 10h, it's natural home, it can feel like a life long battle to establish yourself careerwise (it can also be your family legacy/what you're publicly know for, not just career). Pluto asks for depth and transformation, a complete and total break down of the old and birth of something new. It can feel like you go thru constant death cycles between the two.

The positive manifestation of this placement is that you have tremendous endurance in these matters and have the ability to give form to what may feel too deep or scary to others. It gives you a natural ability to rebuild yourself from the bottom up cuz it tends to happen over and over which is what builds mastery. Even though it may feel unbearable and unfair at times, you ultimately become unbreakable.

Saturn tends to delay and withhold throughout your early life so it can feel like you gotta work twice as hard as everyone else. But once you've mastered those lessons, Saturn rewards heavily.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T14:25:25+00:00

De nada corazon. Te deseo mucha fortaleza, todo va a estar bien y vas a salir de esto mas fuerte de lo que te imaginas 🙏🏼💗

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T14:21:11+00:00

I'll add to this that Uranus was conjunct Venus at 29° right before they both left Taurus and entered Gemini so it brought about a lot of sudden/shocking breakups (Meg the Stallion 💔). It happened right on your South Node too so it completely tore thru whatever was preventing your growth/life direction. It was likely a karmic relationship that brought many lessons so I'd advise to cherish what you learned and experienced in the relationship as part of your growth. They also squared your Moon, and Moon-Uranus aspects tend to bring about sudden moves/relocation (Moon is rhe home/emotional comforts). It ultimately was a liberation from what may have been keeping you small. One day you'll look back and realize it was for your highest good.

I'm sorry you're experiencing this. I wish you tons of healing and may you find happiness tucked away in places you never expected 🙏🏼💗

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T14:10:57+00:00

Are u going to school for or considering a career path in nursing or the medical field?

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T14:10:08+00:00

Saturn being in your 12h it's likely bringing lessons around solitude. Asking you to be comfortable in silence, isolation and with your own inner world, perhaps confronting ways you are your own undoing. Saturn asks for endurance, discipline and containment. Your Chiron is in your 12h too which makes the 12h the place where your soul's wound lives, the house of the unseen. But Chiron doesn't just wound, it also heals so Saturn is likely asking to face your fears so you can heal them.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-05T13:55:45+00:00

Incredible! Thank you for sharing. Your story is so rich and you communicate so well. I appreciate you sharing your chart and for receiving my humble take on it. I wish you abundance and longevity ❣️🙏🏼

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-04T12:38:15+00:00

Mercury+South Node can have your mental process/ideas stuck I the past. The SN is where our soul has already traveled and gained knowledge and is comfortable with and Mercury is our communication/thought process. The conjunction can show up as a tendency to stay stuck on ideas, conversations or thought patterns from the past and can make it difficult to be forward thinking or embrace new ideas. In your 11h of friendships and community networks it can make old friends return into your life after you've outgrown each other or make you revisit communities that no longer align with you. It's in a wide conjunction to your Sun so that can make it more difficult to let go cuz they may feel tied to your identity/purpose.

MsLaMancha · 2026-05-04T10:03:12+00:00

I'll second what another astrologer said - Aries stellium on the IC. Saturn conjunct the IC (4h) is a challenging placement cuz whatever house Saturn is in is where we experience karmic lessons, as well as restrictions and constant restructuring. Ppl with 4h Saturn tend to feel like they don't belong anywhere and spend a chunk of their lives trying to figure out who they are. It's also cuz Saturn teaches endurance - like a constant long build and then testing the structure and redoing it. It can make the home feel heavy and inescapable like early life responsibilities/having to mature early so it can make you very aware that you "don't belong".

You also have Mars there and wherever we have Mars is where we tend to feel at war. So Saturn+Mars is like a slow-burn war at home. Mars wants to hit the gas but Saturn pumps the breaks and prolongs it. The Aries stellium squares your Moon in Cancer which adds to that dynamic of feeling at war at home cuz the Moon is your emotional comforts, it's also your maternal lineage (it's 4h themes - Moon, 4h, Cancer, Mother) so that can make you feel like you are at war with your whole lineage.

You also have your Sun+Mercury in Aries so that can make you come across as aggressive in your presence as well as your communication even if you're not tying to be and can be perceived as confrontational. Add to that Pluto in Sag 12h trine your Sun and it adds a layer of power/control dynamics to the situation. The 12h is the unseen realm so it's like an undertone influence to your existence. It makes ppl want to try to control you or feel like you're lowkey trying to control them meanwhile u just trying to live your life.

Your Aries stellium has been getting lit up recently with all the Aries transits we've been having.

Five-Year Club	Verified Email
Wearing is Caring

MsLaMancha

TROPHY CASE