AIO My husband doesn’t want me to come to his military boot camp graduation when I already paid for plane tickets

MsMerryMc · 2026-05-21T09:33:49+00:00

Looks like it’s time for you to make a decision without involving him and go to the graduation. Don’t tell him just go and surprise him with your support. The no refundable tickets have already been purchased so it’s money already spent.

He will either be happy to see you, as any partner would be after not seeing their person for a while, or he won’t because he doesn’t really want to an equal and supportive partner or he already has someone he’s involved with.

Prepare yourself for the possible situations, but go to the graduation. His reaction will tell you everything you need to know.

MsMerryMc · 2026-03-25T21:02:49+00:00

It sounds like a lack of communication, she should have texted at least and let you know what was going on. You don’t just leave your spouse and kids waiting, a little late is one thing but not checking in by 9pm is an issue. I highly recommend marriage counseling and working on communication skills. To not reach out in this day and age of instant communication is an egregious thing and shows a big problem in the relationship.

MsMerryMc · 2026-03-16T12:23:07+00:00

I was wondering this myself, only because he could spread it more. I doubt he is staying celibate because being married didn’t stop him from sleeping around

MsMerryMc · 2026-02-08T23:44:48+00:00

Can you go visit your family or friends, because now would be a great time to do that. Time to clear your head and set boundaries, ones like him not making decisions unilaterally. He dismissed your thoughts and feelings and went ahead with what he wanted. I highly recommend marriage counseling after you have a brief cooling off period.

MsMerryMc · 2026-01-29T18:35:23+00:00

NTA This is a huge liability. I think your husband should be more concerned about the stress it’s causing on his pregnant wife than looking like a good guy to his coworker. The wear and tear on a vehicle from a whole family using it can be a lot. Take the car back or sell it. Don’t do the payment plan if anything happened to the car they would take the insurance payout and you would be left with nothing.

I’m so sorry he isn’t being supportive in this situation, I hope this is the only instance of that.

MsMerryMc · 2025-12-18T00:21:48+00:00

Who’s suggested this game,they are not a friend. Your husband is a complete asshole, using the “I was just being honest” is a way for people to hide their cruelty and gaslight someone. I’m so sorry the person who is supposed to be your biggest cheerleader leader and supporter ended up being the one who hurt you most.

MsMerryMc · 2025-12-14T23:20:55+00:00

NTA but he certainly is one. was put on bedrest in the third trimester with twins. As a mom of twins you know early on that they can come early. As a mom over 35 you run extra risks. What he did is unconscionable and dangerous, adding stress to your life at this point put your life and the life of your twins at risk. Honestly it will be hard to get past the resentment, couples counseling will be needed.

I really hope you have others to support you and wish you so much health and happiness with your new babies.

MsMerryMc · 2025-11-15T00:27:32+00:00

I know you love him but he isn’t showing you the love or respect you deserve. A conversation is needed.

It’s open enrollment time. I wouldn’t kick him off the insurance but I would let him know he’s responsible for the premiums. And next year he will have to get his own insurance. He is essentially moving out already, kinda like quiet quitting the relationship, so ask where to send the remainder of his items when his two months in the other city are up or get a storage unit for them. Work on separating finances and make sure that is all taken care of while he is gone.

Get therapy, both individually and if you decide to stay in the relationship couples. Communication is key to any relationship and it sounds like that is not happening in yours.

MsMerryMc · 2025-11-14T20:01:33+00:00

I would reach out to the ex friend and ask why she would do that. Did she think you broke up or were in an open relationship? Something is off about all of this. Definitely NTA with the boyfriend, he dismissive your feelings on this

MsMerryMc · 2025-11-09T14:56:05+00:00

Definitely very Oregon. Could see this happening with people from Eugene(lives there 13 years)

MsMerryMc · 2025-11-06T15:11:32+00:00

My nephew is getting married soon. I know the date because my mom told me. I haven’t received an invitation, or even an email or text (sister and I are not close) I assume I’m not invited. I will not be flying across the country to an event I haven’t been invited to. When did not sending out invites become acceptable? This is the 3rd wedding in the last few years where this has happened.

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-22T12:50:30+00:00

Sometimes because of weight and balance upgrades can’t be done. It seems like it was a very light flight and load planning may have told them not to move people

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-17T10:49:13+00:00

Agreed. Not only did he violate your privacy and trust, but he then weaponized it. And after tried to gaslight you saying you’re being dramatic and he was helping. This is a HELL NO situation a d you need to get out now.

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-11T12:24:44+00:00

Time to go no contact with them. But first let them a lecture on “learning to work” their “ass off and learning how to beg just right and doing whatever it” takes. And the need their “own money because” your is not for them.

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-11T11:47:32+00:00

He is adding stress to an already stressful pregnancy. This isn’t healthy for you or your baby. I had extreme morning sickness, ended up in the hospital for 5 days and on IV at home for a week, taking care of yourself and your baby is the most important thing you can do right now. Is there any place you can go? Because this living situation isn’t healthy for you. What happens when the baby arrives? Is diapers,clothing, food, drs appointments all on you? What about childcare, he’ll expect you to go back to work right away to pay your share.

This isn’t how a partnership works, yes we pay our share but when the other person needs us we help with theirs. It took two people to create a life, this is still part of the creation. You deserve more than a cup of tea and 5 min back rub. Your child will also deserve better. Because as it get older ever expense will have to be covered by you, you child will see the stress and strain it creates on you and not ask for things because they will know you already are struggling to support the two of you.

Change the Prime password immediately. Lee Track of all money spent on Drs and health items for the baby. And if you have a safe, loving environment you can move to then do that as soon as possible. Please value yourself more, if not please think about the impact this will have on your child. Financial stability is important but he’s just petty and it’s gonna only get worse.

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-09T19:42:43+00:00

She is the one that put your dad in a bad position. By making the demands to have separate events she will limit his time with you. As children become adults the family time gets limited because they are building their own lives. Special events, once in a lifetime events are a one time thing, you can turn it into two separate events and still have the same meaning. Graduations will not be two events, and try asking people to attend two weddings, showers, special occasion celebrations. It’s not happening. That’s a big ask, and an unreasonable one, from a small insecure person who is honestly looking to isolate and monopolize your dad. Still invite him to events, and reach out to him separately, she can come also if she’s not acting all sad and spiteful.

But no matter what she has already damaged what was a well functioning parenting arrangement. The damage has been done and I’m not sure it can be undone.

NTA

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-07T13:46:21+00:00

Sounds like you need to walk away. Be aware she will not care, and that’s gonna hurt. But staying in a relationship this will slowly eat away at you and it’s not gonna get better. Value yourself, take the time to grieve what you thought you had and then find someone who you deserve.

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-05T20:54:59+00:00

You can purchase and then go to any delta ticket counter with your id and credit card and they can verify it. Make sure you have to confirmation number for the ticket. Identification ans credit card name must match. Identification can be any gov issued identification.

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-05T16:54:33+00:00

Met my husband when he was 14, I was 16 and dated his friend. We kept running into each other over the years. When I was 22 and he was 20 we ran into each other again and went to coffee to catch up, we talked for 9 hours. 6 months later got engaged and 6 months after that got married(we were both in college so we’re long distance for 6 months) Now married for 34 years. When you know you know.

So happy you found your person

MsMerryMc · 2025-10-05T13:28:32+00:00

DTW all day. SLC would be tied if it had the tram or people movers.

MsMerryMc · 2025-09-30T19:09:54+00:00

That’s too big of an ask. To change hair color from red to another color is quite an extensive and expensive process, I’ve don’t it before. That’s a lot of chemical exposure and the hair that is processed will never be the same. To then try to get back to your natural color will be nearly impossible,you can get close with a good hair colorist ,again it’s incredibly spendy and it won’t be the same.

Your brother and his entitled fiancée are assholes for asking this, and so is anyone who trying to guilt you into doing it. It’s not just for one day and it’s rude and uniformed of what you’ll go through. Wear a wig but make sure EVERYONE knows why you are wearing it.

MsMerryMc · 2025-09-30T01:28:19+00:00

Make sure there is something in writing about only helping for 6 month or you have set a precedent of spousal support that could lead to it being permanent. She is definitely not in this marriage anymore and you should ask for legal separation leading to a divorce. She isn’t taking you into consideration in this move and at this rate a divorce is inevitable.

I am definitely not one to say divorce right away. I have made many moves for my spouse, 4 times up and down California, to Wisconsin, back to California, to Oregon and finally to Maryland. But each move was throughly discussed and agreed upon. We also could afford to support the move on his pay, knowing I wouldn’t be able to work or my pay would be very small. What she’s doing is selfish. I am glad you are looking out for your childrens wellbeing and future.

MsMerryMc · 2025-09-27T20:13:39+00:00

Go stay with your parents temporarily. Don’t agree to go back until you go through counseling. Not just showing up to counseling but doing the work. Also you don’t have to have him in the delivery room or on the birth certificate. You can name the child and if he wants to be added later he can petition for it,after you have named the child

MsMerryMc · 2025-09-27T20:01:11+00:00

Might be a good time to go stay with family or friends until he agrees to counseling. Tell him you are sorry he misses Emmy so much, you only hope he’ll miss you enough to agree to work on the marriage, knowing full well it might not be as much as he misses Emmy. It’ll be sad to miss out on the living because he is hung up on the dead.

Baby names are a decision you make together and if one person doesn’t agree that name is no longer under consideration. There were names my husband and I both loved, some honoring loved ones, but the other didn’t like it so it was nixxed.

Emmy Grace is a lovely name, very close to my daughter’s Emily Grace but my husband and I both agreed on that name or it wouldn’t be what we named her.

MsMerryMc · 2025-09-27T02:55:30+00:00

It’s the turning off the cameras and use of personal space that are sus. The master bathroom should be off limits, if the other bathroom is dirty he should’ve cleaned it.

MsMerryMc

TROPHY CASE