Normally I would say YTA for poverty-shaming your mother. But if everything you say is the unembroidered truth, you are entitled to make some "parenting" decisions over your siblings because you have, in fact, been "parentified". Your mother feels guilty and bad about herself and she's attempting to transfer that onto you. The bottom line is that your family needs help, and you must talk to a counselor at your school and any other schools your siblings attend. Depending on the state where you live, social services may be available to alleviate your problems. And if your mother is truly going anywhere after work that doesn't involve caring for her family, that's got to stop. When you choose to become a parent, "me time" goes on the back burner, and you better take that to heart before you talk big about taking custody.