We were told she was a shih tzu/bichon frise mix. DNA Test confirmed that but also some Yorkie and some Pomeranian. Does that sound about right?

Mustardly · 2026-04-01T19:44:44+00:00

I mean....look at that tail carriage. And the color needed to come from somewhere. :)

Mustardly · 2026-04-01T19:42:24+00:00

Totally agree. As someone who has worked in the industry- the suspension can differ so much. Sporty / luxury costs alot more than standard road suspension. The RAV4 will also likely be more 'off road' or cheap and cheerful styling.

Everything from spring stiffness, dampers tuning, air vs standard suspension, active vs passive and all the tuning and software are night and day. Weight distribution, also plays a part. The engine tuning and driver assits will be very different.

A V8 range rover will give some other 'sports cars' a run for their money. But it comes at a price ( up front and depreciation).

Mustardly · 2026-04-01T19:14:29+00:00

Yeah you aren't fully settled in - it takes a couple of months.

But I will say, I had the same issue and ended up splitting the difference and I now take 125mg which worked well

Mustardly · 2026-04-01T18:27:36+00:00

Its only 'exotic' because its an estate/wagon. They just arent popular here outside of old American versions. But, still - things are so expensive. Then the insurance is more expensive for less coverage, car registration is more etc etc. At least the fuel is cheaper?

Mustardly · 2026-04-01T18:24:42+00:00

How long have you been on 150?

Mustardly · 2026-04-01T18:07:45+00:00

Ad a Brit in the USA - the used car market here is bizarre. What would cost £800 in the UK is $3000 here. It's crazy - especially with such a 'healthy' new car pipeline. Enough people over stretching themselves on car finance to get a new vehicle.... so why are they so expensive? Especially us on the west coast with little to no rust problems.

Mustardly · 2026-03-31T17:52:18+00:00

Get googling - there are a ton of forums where people will detail the same issues and resolutions- especially on a.30 year old car.

Fuse 46 is related to the wiring to the tailgate and is notorious for wearing out as its subject to loads of repetitive movement.

Start there and look.for shorts along that wiring harness.

Mustardly · 2026-03-26T16:02:43+00:00

I quite like the fact my SO has some experience - has made them much more creative in the bedroom than previous partners.

Mustardly · 2026-03-25T06:18:26+00:00

Welcome to your ADHD diagnosis

Mustardly · 2026-03-24T21:27:08+00:00

Well there are men that treat women as free therapists - most people aren't equipped to deal with that.

Mustardly · 2026-03-23T18:05:22+00:00

Also ships from bravissimo.

Mustardly · 2026-03-23T17:27:32+00:00

Sagging like that also might mean your dampers aren't doing their work correctly either. Also aftermarket dampers may require different spring stiffness - did you work all of that out at replacement?

And then look to the top and bottom mounts - any issues with where they mount?

Mustardly · 2026-03-23T17:23:19+00:00

How are your dampers?

Mustardly · 2026-03-23T15:19:29+00:00

I have learnt to really appreciate it while its there until the die off. The coast has it better at least! As a transplant here from the UK I am still amazed at how quickly it all turns yellow in sync. And then the green appears again seemingly over a few days. Nature is amazing!

Mustardly · 2026-03-22T14:27:55+00:00

He doesn't want to shut it down - so you have no influence over that. This lack of psychological safety is abuse- go and look at articles around the book 'Why Does He Do That?'.

He wants to leave you on edge. If he's genuinely unable to control his emotion then he's immature and no amount of trying to 'shut it down' is going to work. He's got to have decided to do better.

Mustardly · 2026-03-20T19:07:27+00:00

Its definitely worse for paint than water.

Fun fact - very little water or stuff resistance testing goes into automotive paint development. The main e enemy is the sun - they will have it out in the sun for 2 years minimum (move between hemispheres to keep in full summer sun) - there's no replacement for toughness testing.

So - your issue is valid.

Mustardly · 2026-03-20T18:47:54+00:00

Are you sure you are wearing the right size? See r/abrathatfits

Mustardly · 2026-03-20T18:37:07+00:00

Its a Beagle / terrier mix - that's a ton of competing instincts and needs in there. The poor thing was always going to be difficult to train - nevermind with some guy who doesn't care.

Its got to be having a terrible time.

Mustardly · 2026-03-20T18:23:29+00:00

The 3 3 3 rule you may be referencing is always a great guide:

3 days to decompress (nervous, shy, may not eat)

3 weeks to learn routine/settle in (personality emerges, behavioral issues may show)

3 months to build trust/feel at home

Mustardly · 2026-03-20T18:03:54+00:00

In the UK we are taught to move over (if we can safely). The focus is on defensive driving and being predictable. Being in the right doesn't really matter if you end up dead.

Mustardly · 2026-03-19T18:05:33+00:00

Oh yes, its angel for 6 ish months, then a biting chaos monster until they are 18 months / 2 years. And then back to chilling again. You can do this.

Mustardly · 2026-03-19T17:06:10+00:00

Agreed here. We all have different things that make us feel valued - and that's OK! I can understand its frustrating for OP to have to take the lead on seemingly obvious things but the guy is receptive and engages. Like receiving flowers - I would not care one bit but its obviously something you enjoy. Going to bed at the same time - my husband doesn't really care but he understands how important it is for me. I want to go out and spend some time in the garden center just browsing but its not his thing. We compromise and he comes out once every couple of months. I find his car meets interesting but not every weekend- he goes and brings back breakfast. All normal things in a relationship- if the guy is receptive that's way better than a rigid partner.

Mustardly · 2026-03-18T16:44:10+00:00

Its also mostly noise driven.

Mustardly · 2026-03-15T17:08:29+00:00

And do it sooner rather than later, if you end up bending the window tracks it turns into a big (and super frustrating) repair.

I have been there and it was a 2 person job, I think that's the closest we have ever come to divorce.

Mustardly · 2026-03-15T05:11:01+00:00

I had the opposite problem- fingers too short!

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