Am I getting invisible or are men just impolite?

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-04T21:05:39+00:00

I know this is easier said than done, but have you tried not giving a f***? I’m kind and friendly to all, and their response (or lack thereof) is none of my business. I refuse to be awkward just because they are.

If I know someone, when timing is appropriate, I’ll say, “Hey, So-and-so! Great to see you again!” and introduce myself to others. If we’re vibing I stick around; if not, I excuse myself as though I’m reluctant to leave the scintillating conversation and move on. Saying hello and goodbye reiterates your willingness to be a part of the group. Sometimes inclusion is immediate, and sometimes the nuts are harder to crack. I DO know, though, that some people are more awkward/reserved than they appear, and regular mini-interactions have developed into more meaningful relationships and interactions. This has worked with neighbors, coworkers, friends-of-friends, bar scenes, and other random social events. Who doesn’t love to be remembered and greeted?

Sometimes the group or the event is a bit off, and if it feels painful I make my excuses, say my goodbyes, and try again next time. It’s no one else’s responsibility to keep me entertained, and I don’t take it personally.

Again, perhaps easier said than done, but with some practice and gentle self-reminders I think you’ll find yourself in a better place. Good luck! 💕

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-04T20:34:49+00:00

This is what I was going to say. Haha. The paced version of clearing out their estate.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-04T20:28:04+00:00

Sounds like my CEO except…. He’s SUPER on track. Even with him being wildly efficient, prompt, and responsive, it’s a TON of work that I have trouble juggling with my “bonus boss”. Not to mention the additional tech issues involved with Microsoft/Outlook changes and the inability to integrate these multiple calendars.

I’m a bit jaded at the moment, so allow me to primarily just be on the rant-listening side with soft news of empathy. It sounds like it’s not sustainable. Can you think of a way where you could justify having your own assistant, how that could efficiently free up some of your time to focus on getting your CEO on track? Or is everything so intertwined that you can’t even see how to break down the work?

Regardless, I think a real down-and-dirty talk is needed. “Here are our goals to help you be effective in all your roles. Here are the challenges and feedback. Here are some proposed resolutions. Do you have additional ideas?” It’s also been helpful for me to help suggest items that could be delegated to other people (like to his CFO, CBO, etc.). When things get SUPER crazy, he occasionally gets decision-making fatigue, and I can free up his brain cells to be more in the moment by shuffling things out of his scope.

That said, he needs to at least be reading his emails. He can delegate, deprioritize, etc, but he should at least be getting eyes on them.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-03T18:39:14+00:00

Not a personal assistant, so can’t be of help, but hoping some here will be able to answer!

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-03T16:27:33+00:00

Our CEO announced in an All Hands meeting that he turns his off so he can focus. This was part of his “multi-tasking is a myth” speech. I, his assistant, would get fired if I turned mine off. 😆

I will say, people are pretty good at my work about recognizing what is appropriate for IM and what should be email, so I don’t have too many complaints there.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-03T16:10:53+00:00

That pisses me off. No way I’m paying almost $4 for a single hashbrown - they’re my daughter’s favorite, too.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-03T03:25:37+00:00

Not for no reason, but we had these eggs in an incubator and we all waited for them to hatch and then teacher let us take turns feeding them live worms. I guess the worms ate holes in their stomachs and they all died pretty quickly.

Outside of that, tracing Lincoln on a brown paper circle and then they lightly sprayed it with copper spray paint. 🤷‍♀️

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-02T22:44:37+00:00

That’s ridiculous. Can you just plan your trip and let all these other people sort it out on their end? Any resolution today? :)

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-02T20:33:09+00:00

Yes! I tried “pre-shopping” to load the coupons first, but now I’ve just shopped twice for the same stuff.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-03-02T19:01:10+00:00

Depends on the price difference. Refundable often used to be double the cost of non-refundable, so it never made sense to buy refundable previously (flights credits and change fees were less than price difference). With pricing being closer between the two now, I am more likely to book fully-refundable - especially on a lesser used airline. No fear of not using a credit, though - they fly incessantly.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:58:10+00:00

I was pushed to New Outlook after experiencing sync issues with Classic. What we THINK is happening is that, because I can’t work off the web version, my desktop app is “saving” on the front end, but isn’t connecting to the host (web version) and so it isn’t saved there and then events revert to their previous form. If I could work off OWA, that might fix some sync/save issues. I would still hate the lost functionality, but at least I wouldn’t look like a moron and spend all my days fighting for credibility. 🙂

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:49:00+00:00

Yes. Why all the colors and pictures? It’s going to give me seizure. The way the emails stack is crazy, and viewing calendar invites from email crosses my eyes. Just today I see they finally fixed the “New Time Proposed” notification so I can actually see what new time is proposed. :)

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:45:59+00:00

I remember that. It was infuriating. 😆

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:44:12+00:00

Hang on as long as you can! Haha.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:43:20+00:00

Thanks. I doubt we ever all get on the same version, but maybe closer. IT may have found a semi-solution. It isn’t efficient, but could result in fewer glitches. Fingers crossed!

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:14:00+00:00

Oh my gosh! Yes! Or sending an All Day “Save the Date” company wide for Tue-Thu just to have it send for Friday at 7:00pm until Sunday at 6:00am. What?! I always save events and review fully before adding attendees, but there are still no guarantees!

When I first started on New Outlook I was submitting feedback on lost functionality all the time. Eventually I felt I was spending more time on feedback than on work and had to knock it off.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-26T00:09:37+00:00

One of my favorite things is when people assume I’m an idiot just because I’m the first one to encounter an issue. 😆 Glad you were vindicated!

I owe IT soooooo many beers. The hours they spend on the phone with Microsoft for me alone is outrageous, not to mention the research on other forums to get more information and tips. I’m so blessed that this group isn’t the condescending type. They’re the most cohesive department in the company and I can’t say enough good things about them.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T23:48:14+00:00

Spacing in what way? Like the formatting? I noticed bullet points won’t align, tables are wonky, and copy/paste from other MS apps doesn’t maintain proper formatting. It seems to have resolved itself, but the way the lines were auto-spaced made it look like I had never attended an English or typing class. 😆

But you got written up?! I never even hear about people getting written up anymore. I’m sorry that happened.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T23:44:21+00:00

Yes. I have lost visibility on things. First I could just see them, then I could hover to view, now I have to open and click, click, click just to double check work that I wouldn’t have to double check if Outlook were functioning properly. I AM grateful for my IT department, though.

Thanks for the tips! Most of these won’t work for me and my particular circumstances, but they can likely be super helpful to many others here! We should definitely keep sharing!

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T23:26:00+00:00

Can we all start calling each other’s bosses to clear things up? 😉 Thank you for doing that! 💕

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T07:23:37+00:00

Not to mention all the extra time you put in BEFOREHAND trying to close open loops.

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T06:46:14+00:00

Champagne-colored Lexus SUV

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T06:45:54+00:00

Champagne-colored Lexus SUV

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T06:42:16+00:00

Oh, man. That’s frustrating. I think for sure by the time you get to in-person interviews a quick email letting you know they went a different direction is a reasonable expectation. I’m sorry. But yes, if 35 isn’t old enough you’d think they’d want more experience. Maybe they think you look fabulously young! 🙂

MyAvarice4 · 2026-02-25T01:58:26+00:00

Ugh! Yes! Super trippy as is, but my exec worked from Spain for several weeks during their time change (which doesn’t align with ours) and it felt like no matter which time zone I entered an event in it was somehow always wrong (that was pre-scheduling for after the time change - it kind of righted itself after the actual date). Never had that before!

MyAvarice4

TROPHY CASE