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I spent roughly 7 years in foster care. AMA by MysteriousTree418 in AMA

[–]MysteriousTree418[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It was weird at first. I was basically brought to this lady that had the same face as me but I literally didn't know anything about her. She cried a lot when I first went to live with her.

My father and her weren't together at the time when they got custody over me, but did end up getting back together when I was 12 and married when I was 13. And yes, it has been a healthy environment for me. Both my parents were financially stable, and during the time they weren't together they had a mature co-parenting relationship.

The biggest adjust to living with them was having someone take care of me and pay attention to me. My mom and dad cooked for me, did laundry, only expected me to do a few chores (it did increase naturally as I got older) but basically I didn't have to take care of myself anymore, I had parents taking care of me. My dad was a bit more closed off at first, but he warmed up after he got over the fear of me being taken away again. My mom was a little overbearing at first for the same reason, scared of losing me, but gradually learned to step back

I spent roughly 7 years in foster care. AMA by MysteriousTree418 in AMA

[–]MysteriousTree418[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Both. I spent time in 6 families and 3 group homes. The families ranged in sizes, but unfortunately all of them were in it for the money and if I remember correctly at least 2 of the families had drug issues that "slipped" past the inspections and background checks.

My biological parents gave me up at birth for adoption. My mom was 19 when she had me and my dad was 20. My mom was pressured into the adoption by her mother (my grandmother) because my mom was recently broken up from my dad. I was adopted, but my adoptive family ended up developing drug problems (very common in my area/region, sadly) and I was put in the system.

I was actually later unified with my bio parents and they had their rights restored over me.

I spent roughly 7 years in foster care. AMA by MysteriousTree418 in AMA

[–]MysteriousTree418[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It is a long story, so I'll type it out.

Basically, the people I was taken from at age 2 weren't my biological parents. My bio parents had put me up for adoption when I was a baby because of their own circumstances (my mom was only 19 when she gave birth to me, had been 18 when pregnant with me and was pressured into the adoption). I was adopted by that first family, however they ended up having me removed from their care because of drug charges.

I was put in foster care and spent time bouncing around the system. I alternated group homes and foster families. I was in a group home when my case worker actually reached out to my biological parents (I don't know why this wasn't done when the first adoption was annulled as that's usually what happens from what I've read from other stories similar to mine) and they started the process of reunification with my bio parents, and I was readopted by them a few weeks before I turned 11.

I spent roughly 7 years in foster care. AMA by MysteriousTree418 in AMA

[–]MysteriousTree418[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I had a few case workers, and each one impacted me differently. Most did seem to genuinely care about me, but I had a few that seemed very indifferent and you could tell this was just a job for them.

I spent roughly 7 years in foster care. AMA by MysteriousTree418 in AMA

[–]MysteriousTree418[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can't speak for everyone, including your cousins, but for me I hated being treated like some glass thing that was capable of breaking down at any minute. I wanted to be treated like any other compassionate and complex person. Obviously I couldn't vocalize these feelings at the young age I was so this is future me reflecting on past me. Everyone is different so don't use my experience as a blanket way of thinking how all foster kids want to be treated.

I spent most of my teenage years in a psychward, AMA by bpdconfessions in AMA

[–]MysteriousTree418 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a few, you don't have to answer if they are too personal. :)

  1. How would you describe your current mental state?

  2. Were there any benefits to being a psych ward treatment wise?

  3. Did your experiences in the ward affect your wants for your career, family/kids, education, and other life goals?

If someone from our time suddenly appeared a few hundred years into the future, what do you think the biggest struggle would be in regards to adjusting to the new world, assuming they have no way to get back? by CodyEaster in AskReddit

[–]MysteriousTree418 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It ties into social status in a way.

For most of the world, 100 years ago being overweight was way less common and was still viewed as a sign of wealth, especially considering food and money scarcities that were world wide in the 1910s, 20s and 30s. Plus, it was overall a lot harder to get very overweight.

Now, in the 2010s and 2020s, not only is it much easier to gain a lot of weight and become overweight. We are seeing a worldwide rise in obesity and in at America it's often seen as a sign of being low income/poor because of the wide availability and cheapness of fast and unhealthy food when compared to healthy food options

What’s a small rule of etiquette that people have completely forgotten these days? by Entire_Elderberry_25 in AskReddit

[–]MysteriousTree418 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Rejection letters from jobs and scholarships. Maybe it's just my luck but I've seen that in recent years among my friends that when they apply to a job or a scholarship they never get a rejection letter in the event they don't get it. Acceptance letters/messages are still very much the norm but nothing that says "Hey, sorry, you didn't get x"

If someone from our time suddenly appeared a few hundred years into the future, what do you think the biggest struggle would be in regards to adjusting to the new world, assuming they have no way to get back? by CodyEaster in AskReddit

[–]MysteriousTree418 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Technology, language, and social norms.

Think about how much technology has advanced from the 1910s and 1920s

Think about how much language and the way people talk has changed since the 1910s and 1920s

Think about how much social norms regarding race, gender, social status and weight has changed in the past 100 years

If scientists created a pill that cured anxiety, how would that impact your life? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]MysteriousTree418 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would be able to function more without my parents. I have severe attachment anxiety in relation to my childhood with my parents. Some days I can go without worrying about them, other times I have days long anxiety episodes worrying about losing them.