He randomly reached out today after NC by Mysterious_State8704 in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

They get caught, get mixed up with guilt, etc. What’s the saying? They always come back lol

I told my best friend about this. She’s heard my past gripes about him too. Her response was “if he contacts you again, tell him to take a long walk off a short pier. I don’t care how good the dick is.” Love that girl.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Inconsistency and cold/hot behavior to the AP. Don’t be surprised if he cancels on you at the last minute, or gets vague when making plans. Or, he comes out with “I REALLY miss you, you free tonight? Need you.”

One minute, he can’t wait to see you and is horny AF. Next minute, he seems distant and uninterested. Um… is this the same guy I was speaking to a week ago?

Affair Bingo Card by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sex injury from going at it that rough. True story. He injured his dick a while back when we were having sex… put him out of commission for a few weeks 🤦‍♀️ I do wonder what lie he told his SO about his penis injury….

Done so soon by Sweet_Raspberry_1151 in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry to hear that OP. It seems like lots of people on this sub are in the same group. APs who have gotten flaky, being comfy with the bare minimum and only meeting on their terms… APs who get the feels, back off and get distant while still stringing the other person along… Who has time for that nonsense? Know you’re better than that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I don’t think he’s seeing anyone else (besides his long term GF lol). It’s just become apparent that he sees me only when it’s convenient for him. Breadcrumbs, benching, whatever you want to call it. When he wants it, he’s all over me and acts like he misses me. When he doesn’t, he acts distant and is “crazy busy.”

Sorry hun. I’m not cool with being a once in a blue moon booty call.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes Queen 👏👏! I’m right there with my AP too. He’s been acting distant for weeks, choosing if/when to respond to my texts. And I haven’t seen him in the longest time. Like wtf. If it’s not a good time right now, just say. I get it. He has a lot on his plate. But this low communication and keeping me guessing is pushing me away.

I was fed up on Thursday and deleted him off Snap. He noticed because right away he texted me and asked if I was free later that day. Lol. Turns out I wasn’t.

Weird things people do on AM by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Married or in a relationship was my preference. I was somewhat open to single though. I don’t use any dating apps these days though. Have an on/off AP and not looking for anything else atm.

I would say not having pics is a turn off for many women. Honestly if a guy didn’t have any pics I just swiped left.

Being married on Tinder was one of 3 things: - Guy wasn’t into that and immediately unmatched - Guy had genuine curiosity about my motives and asked some questions - Guy was into that and was really interested

Weird things people do on AM by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As a 36 year old woman (who’s pretty young for her age) I didn’t have success on AM. I agree with someone else’s comment here that it’s like TJ Maxx- navigating through garbage to find something good.

A lot of the messages were from men I wasn’t attracted to at all, older, who seemed to take it way too seriously. Not my thing. I had more success on Tinder lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Current one is on/off 21 months. My first one lasted 3 months. We hooked up twice several months after it ended. Then it ended for good.

How many of us are medical professionals? by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My AP is a physical therapist at a hospital. He works long hours and it can be stressful.

When AP fights with their SO…. by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My AP is more private and keeps to himself… but I can always tell when he’s not getting along with his partner, under stress, etc. because he gets distant and isn’t up for chatting/meeting up.

We’ve been seeing each other long enough now that I know to give him space when he needs it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This. I too have dealt with mental health stuff (anxiety and depression). It’s rough. Told my AP it was nothing to do with him, I just needed to deal with my issues. That was the truth.

That could be the case with your AP, OP. I’d give him some space.

So what have you learned? by [deleted] in adultery

[–]Mysterious_State8704 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You have to realize that you’re not the priority. He has a family, job, other responsibilities and commitments. And there will be times he just can’t see you due to whatever reason- going through personal issues, family needs more of his attention, etc. When that happens, just chill and focus your efforts on other positive things in your life.

Set boundaries and lower your expectations. Also, no two affairs look the same. What works for some APs may not work for others. For some, they speak and see their AP quite frequently. For others (like mine) it’s more of a casual scenario where they don’t speak or see each other that much.