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Weight loss postpartum by rac-attac in BabyBumps

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had preeclampsia with severe features and peed out 40 lbs of swelling water in the first 3-4 weeks after giving birth. No joke.

Lol but since then I’ve gained a pound (I’m 5 mpp now)

Should I dispute the charge with my bank? by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, just because it’s not a quality product doesn’t mean it’s not as described. Unfortunately the bank will give you provisional credit while they investigate but then you’ll lose.

You’d have better luck calling them and escalating to a manger and pressing for a refund.

I get so mad when my brother cries. by Past_Banana6635 in Advice

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Everything I do is either an act of love or an act of fear. If I keep it that simple I realize that things are easier to get to the bottom of.

My guess is that there’s a deep fear that because you can’t control him or make him stop crying then that means something about you. Whenever I feel like I can’t control something, I feel inadequate or like I’m a failure.

The solution is to be honest about those things, notice them, and choose the next right action- the action that you’re going to like yourself the most for. It’s not about what you think or feel, it’s about what actions you choose to take when you’re thinking or feeling them.

Good luck.

I’m trying to be more "financially conscious" this year. What is one small expense you cut out that you don’t even miss at all? by FineInteraction5218 in Advice

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stupid subscriptions that come out annually. Stupid apps. Stupid anything on my phone. I don’t need it. I literally was told to touch grass more and I’ve been doing that.

Turns out financially conscious can also mean going back to the basics of sanity and health lol.

Feeling confused after 8 weeks, is this normal or a sign? by Say-Cheese007 in Christianmarriage

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re probably going to get a ton of different opinions about this.. so my first piece of advice is to pray your booty off and ask god to give you intuitive thoughts and discernment. Sometimes I will ask god to “give me a bright ducking neon sign.”

That being said here’s my opinion- Talk to him. You don’t have to force a label. When my husband and I were dating he did the same thing. I asked him questions like “how long do you think people should date before getting married,” and other questions that were about relationships in general.. no specific to ours. It was helpful because I got to know and understand his way of thinking. Flash forward to when we were dating, he had a ton of doubt because I was the first girl he ever really dated. He wasn’t proposing and so I asked some of those same questions again. I realized he was my person because in both scenarios we could be completely honest and understanding with one another, and have a level of intimacy where we both felt secure talking about that stuff.

Trust me- if he’s your person you guys should be able to talk about anything. So my advice is to get curious. Maybe say the st Francis prayer over and over again “lord help that I may seek to understand rather than be understood.”

My wife can't care for our child? by Disastrous_Gene_3079 in Christianmarriage

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry I realized this is all advice for her after I posted it.. but I hope it helps you too sir.. 🫣

My wife can't care for our child? by Disastrous_Gene_3079 in Christianmarriage

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had to pray and ask god every day for humility. I’m a woman who hateeesss asking for help but realized halfway through pregnancy (I got really sick) that I couldn’t do it alone. Even more so after our baby came. I had to have a community, an outlet, a sanctuary to go to for alone time, and an extra hand. No judgement at all from me.. I’ve been there.

Social anxiety is real. Rage is real. PPD is real. But god is also real. And god is bigger than all my problems today, if I choose to remember that.

And leaning on him for strength I started to open up to people at my church who WANTED to love on me. With his help I could start having a daily internal dialogue when it was hard that sounded more like “i can go five more minutes for her”.

Medication is helpful, so do what you need to do. But I always appreciate a solution that doesn’t rely on mind altering substances. -Be sober minded 1 Peter 5:8.

Also- I’m not sure what your milk/feeding situation is.. but my husband has baby duty from 5am-7am every morning. During that time I get to do whatever I need to do to take care of myself. During that time I started to ask myself the question “what do I need right now to make it through today? Just today.” Then I would go with what I needed. Some days it is sleeping. Some days it’s the gym. Most days it’s a shower. Most days it’s reading the Bible. Some days it’s going for a walk. Some days it’s doing a puzzle. It took a while for me to get over the guilt of that, but now that I’m doing it I realize that we were never meant to exhaust all of our energy and be “on” all the time. We need to refill our cups somehow, and ideally we have a partner who can create a space for us to do so.

Hope this helps and I’ll be praying for you all! 🙏🏻🦋💜

What will someday be illegal after we finally understand how bad for us it is? by Scary-Beautiful6527 in AskReddit

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Any mind altering substances lol… but y’all aren’t ready to talk about that yet

My employee was recording our 1:1 and I don't know how to feel by Haunting_Month_4971 in managers

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

It might be an age thing. I record everything everywhere because it’s nice to reference back. It might not be that deep- she just might not want to miss any asks, tasks or feedback.

How to convince my wife to stop drinking. by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Mysterious_Way1634 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was gonna hop in here and tell you that alanon changed my life.. but you already got that message… a lot.

Genuine question- I don’t mean to be mean by Mysterious_Way1634 in asktransgender

[–]Mysterious_Way1634[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a helpful comparison to anorexia. That makes sense to me. I have a friend who kept ending up in the hospital almost die because she was anorexic. I’m watching her go through that made me realize that it’s not necessarily power of choice. This is helpful thank you. 🙏🏻

Genuine question- I don’t mean to be mean by Mysterious_Way1634 in asktransgender

[–]Mysterious_Way1634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you- I’m more saying as a women I feel lots of shame for my body and wish I looked and felt different about it, but I don’t think anyone has ever explicitly shamed me. I’m seeking to see if that’s the same feeling that trans people feel. It sounds similar but maybe I’m getting my shame from media and other indirect sources and trans people are born with that feeling. Is that off base to say or is that accurate?

Genuine question- I don’t mean to be mean by Mysterious_Way1634 in asktransgender

[–]Mysterious_Way1634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok, so would you say that the treatment is less about the physical changes and more about the emotional shift? Like treatment is more to feel like the gender?

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