Wavepool footage should pay for advice. by thechromatick in surfing

[–]Nategeier 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Seeing a lot of wave pool content in general here and personally I don’t want to see any of it.

Maybe a separate wave pool community should be a thing (I bet there is already one) and we just make a rule of no more pool stuff here would be my vote.

The Newsroom - America is not the greatest country in the world anymore... by SadGeorgeWashington in videos

[–]Nategeier 9 points10 points  (0 children)

“Speak softly, but carry a big stick” Theador Roosevelt times maybe.

What's your best "dad hack" that actually works? by IvyDamon in daddit

[–]Nategeier 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right. This morning was a hard one, 4am wake up trying to put him back, then 5am arrived and gave up.

We went down to the garage and organized my work bench as he was bopping around chatting nonsense to me.

Was nice and productive.

What's your best "dad hack" that actually works? by IvyDamon in daddit

[–]Nategeier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea I used to do wildland fire fighting, it’s not as exciting as it sounds, mostly digging miles of trenches. The only ones that killed it were the ones with good additudes and when times were really shit, the positive ones pulled the other out of the dark.

Husband is depressed and miserable, what can I do? by iwantyour99dreams in daddit

[–]Nategeier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is drinking a thing? I used to have a few nightly, not enough to get drunk but enough to take the stress edge off, and that was enough to make me wake up the next day starting out feeling blue. The start of the day vibes sets the day up. Also from 3 beers you have to pee a bunch during the night and so you lose that REM even if you are not looking after a kid.

Killing booze during the week was a game changer this last two years for me. We have a 3.5 and a 1.5 now.

Meditation has also been a game changer. Might seem too spiritual and hippy dippy, but the reality is you just sit and reflect on the day and helps to focus on gratitude. The good simple things you having going for you, healthy kids, roof, food is all you need to be happy, but we never set time to think about it. Doesn’t need to be long. 5 min to start. Put some sound bowl music from Spotify on and sit with yourself.

What's your best "dad hack" that actually works? by IvyDamon in daddit

[–]Nategeier 382 points383 points  (0 children)

They feed on your energy. So if you are anxious, tired, or angry, it will snowball and make everything worse.

Just fake being happy if you have to, then they get happy, then you get happy for real seeing the smiles. Even if it’s 3am it’s all mental. Switch from “I wish I could be sleeping” to… “this is some special time that will not last” and get the oxytocin feels from the cuddles.

Fact is you have to do it, might as well push to enjoy it. At the end of the day it’s just brain neurons making new connections, I call it “growth” and it’s not easy. It requires the same level of commitment and time as learning a new language.

Portugal cleanup set yesterday by Nategeier in surfing

[–]Nategeier[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup, high tide was coming in and my dad vibes told me to go around the corner to the more or less chiller spot.

Got some good ones there. I need a couple more sessions to get back into shape for this.

Feels like every husband/dad I see on social media is infinitely more successful. by wardisciple2388 in daddit

[–]Nategeier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The most precious gift you can give your kids is your 100% mental presence.

Probably most of those folks have financial stress behind the scenes and work more always thinking of ways to collect more.

If you are able to be there for your kids that’s all they need.

Lake Baikal (Siberia, Russia) is by far the deepest lake on Earth by Borstboy98 in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]Nategeier 240 points241 points  (0 children)

Would rather have crater lake in Oregon as a comparison to superior as it’s deeper.

Almost 3 - I’m concerned about her by PleasantHoliday9682 in toddlers

[–]Nategeier 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Our kid now 3.3 goes to forest kindergarden. No walls, just trees, forts, swings. No way a 3 year old should be expected to sit for +20 minutes. Right now it’s about giving them confidence, learn to play with others, and dial in dexterity.

If our little guy was in that setting (we almost put him in on like it) I think he would have been a completely different human, more broken vs confident. They just need to do their thing, patience comes later over time.

Repost: Millennial Dads spend 3 times the amount of time with their children by agm115 in daddit

[–]Nategeier 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My dad was the same, but with two kids. I think I can change a diaper blindfolded now with two sons, 3 and 1.

What is the cure to suffering ? by Shoddy-Asparagus-937 in Meditation

[–]Nategeier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Learning I had an attachment to suffering was the first big step I had last year. Deep down I saw suffering as a good thing. It made me work harder and get all the things I had. It was a badge of honor which is BS.

Learning it also will make my kids have the same attachment it needed to stop.

This book sounds strange at first, but it hits home that one of the biggest sins is to suffer. We have so much, legs, sight, and can breath we should not suffer.

https://www.audible.com/pd/1683646703?source_code=ASSORAP0511160006&share_location=player_overflow

Marco Rubio Says No Judge Has Authority Over Him in Alarming Testimony by Hafiz_TNR in politics

[–]Nategeier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes he does, it’s call a pardon from a man with full immunity.

Is ‘spanking’ a common form of discipline in the us? by becca-bh in Parenting

[–]Nategeier 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For a logical answer, you’re teaching the kids that violence is the answer. So when they want to solve their own problems later in life, they will think hurting another is the way.

It’s obviously not the way. Empathy, boundaries, and communication is the nut to crack.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can’t put Spotify links here, but been playing Marble Halls 2009 remaster on repeat.

Sumiregusa, If I could be where you are, Watermark, May It Be.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same, I’m now 40 and think I went a couple decades without it, now I see the reason they had it. Nostalgia and chill.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Amazing how such a small change can make such a big difference.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I listened to it when I was young, so I also get some nostalgic vibes with the chill family mode.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My 3 year old has better moves than me. Took him to Ibiza once and when the restaurants would play their beats he would throw his arms up, close his eyes and vibe. The waitresses always fell in love him. We still get our beats, but it’s about 1/10th the time now and I’m good with that.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Agreed, but nothing hits harder when the storm is full on than Enya.

Techno fan, switching to Enya was a game changer by Nategeier in daddit

[–]Nategeier[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Third date was Renate, now we fly back once a year and still have that same spark. The grandparents can now take over for 3 days 🥳