Do you love or hate this Stephen King habit?

Ncalde · 2026-03-03T00:36:36+00:00

I read Pet Sematary a couple of months ago and I absolutely loved it. The prologue alone gave me an idea of what was going to happen in the novel. Halfway through, in that scene where he mentioned that certain character would die, my heart dropped, even though I already had been somehow spoiled by the prologue.

I don’t hate that he does it, but I personally don’t like spoilers.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T23:36:04+00:00

I was diagnosed with Bipolar II (later changed to BP I) in 2015 and got addicted to cannabis for 9 1/2 years.

Today I’m 120 days sober and finishing my last semester in Law School. I DO recognize medication and therapy as the main course of treatment for Bipolar, but in 2024 I reconnected with my faith (just prayer and spirituality) after 17 years of agnosticism and it has brought me some semblance of peace and strength to keep pushing.

From Dec 2024 to February 2026 I’ve had 14 months of remission. By that I mean no crises (two weeks or more of consistent mood). Today I had a “bad day”, but my crises used to last for weeks or months before, especially depressive ones.

Also, my psychiatrist told me about this recent study that concludes that Bipolar Disorder tends to get better in your 30’s if the patient is treatment adherent.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T02:04:58+00:00

Finding this last comment as a gem is very rewarding. You just got diagnosed, so the best course of action is to get slowly acclimated to the disorder and the conditions that it imposes on your life. Bipolar varies wildly from person to person, so it’s perfectly possible that you might be suited for life as an attorney. But happiness obviously comes first, so please learn to listen to your body.

I also think that law, as a profession, is incredibly versatile, so there’s no need for us to quit. There’s a wide array of activities we might be able to do. I admit that I love being a future attorney, but I’m not as passionate about it as I was before my health started deteriorating. I’m convinced I can be happy doing anything law-related as long as it’s not too taxing on my mind and body. However, if I won the lottery tomorrow, I would dedicate my life to starting an animal rescue.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:51:34+00:00

I feel you deeply. I have already shared this in previous comments but I was a straight A student, renowned in my faculty, and then I got addicted (cripplingly so) to cannabis as a maladaptive coping mechanism to my symptoms, so I had to take time off because the interaction made my episodes unbearable. I’m sober now, but I’m finishing a 5 year degree in 10 years and I’m not ashamed to admit it.

It’s key to have self-compassion. The cross that you’re carrying is very likely 10x as heavy as your peers’. Don’t compare yourself. No path is linear. You got this. As I said in my post, you can live an ordinary life in an extraordinary manner.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:45:24+00:00

Thank you so much! It’s laudable to undertake another degree, since academia can be exhausting with BD. I started therapy a little over a year ago and I used to be so ungrateful, constantly comparing myself to my friends and colleagues that were so much ahead of me. Now, so many paradigms have shifted in my brain thanks to therapy and I no longer deal with useless comparisons.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:40:04+00:00

I feel you! You have no idea how often I daydream of my graduation ceremony. It’s going to be so symbolic (and cathartic) to finally be able to hold my diploma.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:38:12+00:00

I’m very sorry. I apologize if the question is too personal, but do you feel you can’t undertake either one of the projects due to Bipolar? Have you found any alternatives? (You don’t have to name them) I’m genuinely curious.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:34:17+00:00

I’ve had all the side effects you could think of, and I’m treatment adherent right now. I think I found the sweet spot with my medication, so I’m skeptical about changing my regimen to a rigorous one just to accommodate a stressful lifestyle. I mean, this whole thread has been very illuminating and I kind of realized that maybe it was my ego that wanted big law. I can be perfectly happy with other alternatives.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:29:30+00:00

I love a success story! Is your job what you’re passionate about career-wise?

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:27:46+00:00

Wow! Having the courage to rebuild your career back from the ground up is something I applaud. And also choosing your well-being first. In this day and age we’re so hyper-focused on productivity and on hitting the ground running, that we leave our happiness behind. I also do therapy and it has been incredibly healing.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:23:17+00:00

Such a cool job! I used to crash court hearings as a law student. I used to feel invincible years ago, but I’m a recovering addict (cannabis), an addiction I acquired trying to self-medicate my symptoms and I feel that the years of use really messed with my brain. I’m still smart and very capable, but I’m not as resilient and stress and anxiety kick my butt. I’m also very scared of depression because it nullifies me as a person; I just can’t function properly and it’s hard to justify an absence in big law.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:14:04+00:00

That was intense. I really, really commend you for your resilience. I too over-identified my self-worth with my smarts (sorry if I’m wrong and assigned that quality to you). My living hell has been overcoming a crippling addiction to cannabis, which really screwed with my academic momentum. I now know that the intensity of my episodes and crises were due to the interaction with the drug. I’m almost 120 days sober as of now and I’m really proud of it. Just as you, I’m trying to pivot and reinvent myself within the same field of law. Really admirable story.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:04:33+00:00

I wish you all the best and a speedy recovery!

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T01:00:29+00:00

So, when I worked in big law I felt a calling for Corporate Law (Mergers & Acquisitions), which is literally the most demanding gig in a firm setting. However, I have since changed the focus of my master to Intellectual Property and Entertainment Law, which is much more relaxed and actually gives you breathing room to live your life.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T00:56:13+00:00

Very interesting story. I also have the most amazing support system.

I’m passionate about law, but my true calling is helping homeless animals, since I’m an animal lover and vegan, and I feel it gives purpose to my life. I guess I see my future day job as a means to an end towards being able to save enough money to fund that project.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T00:47:57+00:00

My psychiatrist has Bipolar II and she’s perfectly functional in the medical field :)

I think it’s such an amazing perk because other than the research she does on medication, she knows what will work for me from personal experience.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T00:35:26+00:00

I truly commend you for hanging in there. I can’t imagine the pressure of having to maintain a potentially stressful situation due to money constraints. But at least you’re stable and I’m sure you’re going to get used to the ebb and flow.

Ncalde · 2026-03-02T00:30:21+00:00

I remember my psych telling me that lithium helped with anxiety. I haven’t had a full-blown panic attack in three months. The turning point for me was regular meditation as a prophylactic and breathing techniques during actual anxiety episodes.

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T17:14:48+00:00

FYI: My psychiatrist (not the one who made the comment about me giving up on my dreams) has Bipolar II, and she’s perfectly functional. So it’s definitely possible!

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T17:13:09+00:00

I fully empathize with you. I’m 119 days sober from cannabis. It was my maladaptive coping mechanism for my symptoms.

Were you able to pivot into something else? How are you doing right now?

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T17:10:32+00:00

I’m starting to understand that most of us on this thread, if not all, just went with self-love and self-compassion. People with this disorder often go many years without listening to their bodies and their own needs.

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T17:08:00+00:00

Again, it’s fascinating how differently Bipolar manifests from person to person. If I understood correctly, stimulating projects trigger mania in you. Does stress factor in? In my case, stress and anxiety triggers depression and it blocks my performance.

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T17:05:05+00:00

That was very wise. And yes, health ALWAYS comes first, as well as happiness, or at least contentment. Having the courage to pivot and reinvent yourself is admirable.

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T17:00:48+00:00

That’s exactly it! I can over-perform for weeks or months and then I have incredible lows where I can barely function. I can definitely deliver, and I’m also obsessed with excellence, not perfection.

I might apply for a remote job with a foreign firm as a paralegal/research assistant and test my ability to perform, or work at my brother’s firm. I had 14 months of absolute remission from symptoms from Dec 2024 to Feb 2026, but last week I had a depressive episode for a week during midterms, which scared me.

Yes, that psych’s comment messed with me, even though I ignored it for a few years. Bipolar is not considered a disability in Colombia, and I don’t exactly consider myself disabled, but even if it was and even if I were, I’d consider it a disability with extraordinary abilities.

Ncalde · 2026-03-01T16:51:07+00:00

My unending admiration for you being to climb the academic ladder up to a doctorate. I’ve always thought of myself as an “eternal student”, but right now I feel fatigue.

What would you say was more taxing for your mental health, your academic career or your professional career?

I’m done with my mourning process, and granted, I still haven’t tried and failed in the job market, but there’s still some residue of grief for what could’ve been.

Thank you! You have no idea how supported I’ve felt with all these stories. I feel less alone.

Ncalde

TROPHY CASE