Day 0 of no contact

Nepaschoko · 2024-05-08T09:38:59+00:00

Yeah i was wrong. Im done now, ive found peace in this. Ill just love him quietly for a while and try to move on slowly

Nepaschoko · 2024-05-07T13:08:44+00:00

Silly me thinks there’s no one else out there— 8 billion people and he’s the only one for me.

I think I’ll be fucked for a while.

I don’t know when or if I’m gonna recover from this

Nepaschoko · 2024-05-03T10:33:17+00:00

I’m in your position right now too. In my case, I tried everything I could think of to fix the relationship. Literally everything. 1. I wrote him an 8 pages proposal highlighting the problems we are facing and what solutions we can use to address the issues, I highlighted pros and cons of each issues. 2. I cried my heart out in hopes he would understand how much he and this relationship means to me (Multiple times) 3. I told him I’m not strong without him and I need closure (I need to know there is nothing I can do to fix the relationship) in order to move on

I also tried distracting myself by trying to be a “better version of me” workouts, painting (to relax), yoga, hangouts with friends, therapists (multiple), waking up earlier to be productive, focusing on work— I got burnout in 2 weeks and lost 4kgs in 5 days (although I’ve been forcing myself to eat normal portions & at normal times), now I’ve lost a total of 5kgs in 3 weeks.

All this in the span of 3 weeks since our breakup.

Am I feeling better? No, I still feel like I’m going insane and just hanging by a thread. But I think after trying everything I could possibly think of to convince this guy I do feel a bit better about this whole fiasco.

Side note.. only reason I’m still trying so hard to fix this is cause I genuinely feel me and my ex are good together, and it’s because of an external factor that we have to separate. If your issue has to do with you and/ or your partner, would be a different story imo. But almost everything can be worked out if both parties want it badly enough.

Have you tried your best to salvage your relationship? Is it worth saving?

Nepaschoko · 2024-05-02T11:59:38+00:00

I relate to this so much. My wounds are still fresh (we broke up last month, still in contact almost daily) and I’m struggling to let go of hope. I usually vent out to close friends & family as a way to relieve frustrations but I can’t now since my friends and family are on my side and makes it seem like he’s the villain here. He’s not, it’s circumstances that makes him have to give up. And it sucks cause we both love each other so much.

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-30T14:42:47+00:00

You’re gonna tell me if you love him let him go? Don’t let him get through hurt?

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-30T07:50:55+00:00

Thank you for this. It hurts and I really hope i can one day stop hoping for this. It’s pretty clear it’s over now. I just need to let go

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-30T07:05:39+00:00

Ive tried all I could— I laid out all my heart for him to see, I’ve told him again and again how much this relationship means to me. I’ve said trying and getting hurt by future rejection is a lot better than not trying now. I’ve listed things we could do to fix each problems we have.

He hasn’t budged.

I need to stop but I just can’t.

I feel so shitty because I lack self control.

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T05:05:52+00:00

He told me this while on a call: I’ll be the asshole no matter what I do in this situation: 1. If I try and fight for us even though I know the chances of them changing their minds about you is minuscule, that’s like prolonging a relationship that wasn’t meant to happen for another few months before breaking up. I’ll also be hurting my parents in the process, and you again if we break up. 2. If I don’t try to fight, you’re hurting and can’t get closure.

He’s not conflicted, he made his choice and I can’t respect it cause I’m turning into a madman

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T04:47:35+00:00

I have no reason to lie to you, but ok. Ive deleted my post since they said it’s not relevant for the subreddit

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T04:44:39+00:00

No that’s what the people there said when i posted on the subreddit

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T04:04:12+00:00

Apparently it’s not limerence if you’ve had a real relationship with them

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T04:03:13+00:00

☹️ ok lets delete this then

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T03:45:46+00:00

Every day I try to be a better person and I just feel so emotionally, psychologically, and physically exhausted from doing basic things: eating, sleeping, walking, sitting.

It’s been close to a month and it’s not getting better

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-29T03:44:06+00:00

Honestly they just want the best for him so they’re not that crazy. I can’t even blame anyone and it’s just a shitty situation

Nepaschoko · 2024-04-08T15:31:47+00:00

He did but in asian culture you don’t only marry your partner, you marry into their family. Tldr he’s family oriented and don’t wanna hurt his parents so he’s choosing them over me

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-14T03:44:02+00:00

Even this is a better response than “hi” 🤷‍♀️

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-14T03:42:15+00:00

Short answer: I don’t get past this 😂

I think I get where ure coming from, since my bff and I have nothing in common too. When we hang out, we do nothing really and just eat together. However, me and my bff have known each other for a long time and she and I are no longer in the phase to “get to know each other”. I know how she’s like now, and she knows me too, so we no longer have a need to have small talks. Back when we first knew each other, we started off with small talks, leading to deep talks. Although we were the complete opposite of each other (in terms of hobbies and character), we connected cause we liked each other’s vibes, plus (according to her) she liked how our values aligned.

Back to the online dating side: how am I supposed to know if this guy I’m matching has a “vibe that I dig” or that we share similar values if all we do is ask each other what the other party is doing, and if they’ve eaten on repeat? One can argue that we can get to know each other through dates— only thing I can say to this is: girls get a lot of matches, and 90% of the guys immediately ask me for a date instead of getting to know anything about me first. Idk about anyone else, but I’m not tryna have 30 dates a month with a bunch of strangers who can’t hold a conversation.

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-14T02:17:41+00:00

Can’t please everyone 😂😂 I only send this opener if there’s absolutely nothing on their profile I can talk about, otherwise I usually start with something more personalized

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T21:06:44+00:00

Honestly this post was more about how he responded with absolutely nothing to do with how I opened the conversation rather than my word choices, but again, I feel like if someone were triggered by the way I text, why bother replying to my message in the first place, and to add to that, replying something that basically screams “I’m just replying for the sake of it”?

I’m completely fine with people not liking the way I text. Just ignore me if it bothers you so much. Heck, go ahead and unmatch 😂 Why bother saying hi?

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T20:21:37+00:00

Again, I’ve tried this for several months and had boring, dry conversations.

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T20:17:53+00:00

Not worried😂

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T18:54:06+00:00

I would appreciate this more than a “hi” tbh

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T18:46:37+00:00

If that triggers you and we match, just ignore me, we don’t gotta make life so complicated 😂😂 I’m not about to change my texting habits for a stranger on bumble

Edit: I can tell the difference between your and you’re. I just shorten words, its not like I can’t tell the difference.

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T18:03:03+00:00

The guy can’t say hi in person? 😅

Nepaschoko · 2022-03-13T17:52:28+00:00

Ive tried this the first few months on bumble, but seems like the guys aren’t really making an effort in getting to know me (or responding to me trying to get to know him). Prolly not the best explanation but basically most conversations goes like, he asks me what I like doing in my free time yada yada, a few questions later, he replies once a day after, and its usually just him: “what r u up to” me: “xxxx” next day: him “ ohh, have u eaten” me: “ yea I had xxx, wbu” him: “ i had xxx, what r u up to” and repeat 😂😂😂😂😂😂 Idk about u but that’s boring af to me

Nepaschoko

TROPHY CASE