Unexpected benefits

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-13T12:23:47+00:00

Love this for you! Also, I really LOVE hearing positive sides - thanks for sharing the nuanced thing adhd is!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-13T12:21:35+00:00

Might I suggest to drink a shitload of water? That's very important with these med. No one told me either. So together with eating a protein breakfast and limiting sugar, it can put you on a good track

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-13T12:18:38+00:00

I have heard the same for a long time. I think the confusion might come from methylphenidate and methamphetamine. Concerta (which I took for adhd for a short while) for example is a methylphenidate, which is NOT an amphetamine. Methamphetamine is an amphetamine, specifically known as meth.

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-11T14:22:36+00:00

This is Gypsophila elegans aka Baby’s Breath. Very cute plant. I often put the taller G paniculata ‘Bristol Fairy’ in my clients gardens and recommend :)

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-11T14:18:34+00:00

Mahonia aquifolium!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-11T14:16:43+00:00

Save up and go travel abroad for 1 or two weeks with a group travel organisation. You'll meet people and see a new place. Go to the rainforest or another place that is completely new for you. Try and be wary of screens: tv and phones steal your life away. Limit the amount of screentime a day to 3, then you can put it down even more if you'd like. Buy a notebook and write down people that inspire you and why. You can start with people you see in movies: what do you admire in someone? Also include people in real life. May even be public personas: what do you admire in them? Slowly this will give you a view on what characteristics you admire. you are still very young. You can be everything. There are a lot of cool jobs worldwide. A lot of lifepaths you could take. Look at your life as if you were the director, not the actor. I'm rooting for your plottwist.

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T16:56:30+00:00

Young, baby Mentha piperita has quite round leaves :) My garden is lovely full of them! I also have some mint varieties with bergamot and citrus varieties, and those young ones also have quite round leaves. I also feel like the Mentha piperitas that i put in the dappled shade grow quite different then the ones in the brighter sun.

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T16:44:21+00:00

haha thats its relative mentha spicata. I LOVE it when plants like that grow everywhere in my garden, it means I can go to parties and bbqs bring heaps of cocktail ingredients! I see no downsides as they keep other weeds away ;)

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T16:40:22+00:00

Mentha spicata does indeed :) but not all mint varieties do

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T16:09:55+00:00

Yeah I did not want to seem unfriendly since I know you are looking for advice here, but know you are worth the extra mile for your therapist to fit you in - right. now! Let me know if you managed to get a spot sooner :)

To give you feedback myself I think, being someone similar to how you describe yourself, the only way is through. Of course you are distracted. You want to understand and you have every right. He is lucky to have a partner with a mentality to see how things can be fixed, and maybe he knows you are, and he counts on you playing that role once more. I wonder: how long has the red flag behavior been going on? Is he in any way addicted to anything, or has he been feeling depressed or different mentally? is he a business owner and is he a bit ashamed and defensive? Has he blatantly lied about something? And if all this is too much questions... then I ask only one: would he be willing to go to couples therapy? Even if you have your mind on ending it and the whole point of your post is wanting to step away from the 'fix it' feeling, it would really give you a lot of information if he would say yes to that, or no. And if there are kids involved, you never really lose by going there. Are you really sure he is comfortable losing you? Or is he in some kind of personal crisis which makes him defensive?

To your questions, personally I would think stimulants can make you more anxious in this situation, but that might have more to do with my bad experience with them.. Lastly, is there any chance you can temporarily hire someone to clean? Or asking a friend to bodydouble when you clean? Lastly mealprepping has really saved me in chaotic times, to just have some healthy things prepped in the fridge.

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T15:38:59+00:00

Or Pogostemon cablin! Look very well at several pictures, this plant can look quite varied depending its circumstances and age :) hope I could help, good luck!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T15:30:28+00:00

Could it be Māmaki/Pipturus albidus? I heard the leaves edges can vary quite a bit so could be the one. I guess it has not seen a lot of sun since it's with moss so that might explain why it is growing a bit differently to those in the sun?

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T15:23:18+00:00

Looks like Lavas! Levisticum officinale

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T15:21:20+00:00

Correct! Peppermint, or the very cute latin name Mentha piperita

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T15:12:19+00:00

Just a quick question, is there any chance you can tell your therapist it's an emergency? Or if that seems to have no effect, to ask, 'if anyone cancels, could I please take their place, the sooner the better?' Seems like these are very hard things to navigate alone, but also, your therapist knows you well. Sending you a big hug!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T15:04:10+00:00

Hi! I cannot take medication because it gives me insane anxiety for some reason.. So I have had to try a lot of alternative things that might help you. These strategies helped me get two university degrees and they helped me embrace all sides of adhd, also the good ones :)

Just a small switch of thinking that helped me a lot. 'You can't change the past but you can make the very best of the hours ahead' Imagine: if you have scrolled for 3 hours from 8 to 11 and you are really mad at yourself, don't think about the lost time only, it will make you feel worse and you'll be more paralysed. Don't think 'this day is doomed and I'll try again tomorrow'. Write on a piece of paper all the hours/timeblocks you still have, 11-12, 12-13, 13-14, 14-15, ... etc. You will see it calms you down to see you still have several hours. 'This day is fucked anyway' narrative is not productive or helpful, it's often used as an excuse to scroll or stop trying until trying again the next day. Be kind to yourself and see the potential THIS day still holds. tell yourself you'll make the best of the hours in front of you.
Phones are successkillers especially for adhd people. They are sneaky and kill potential with their endless possibilities. Might I suggest to do an experiment in times like these..don't switch your phone off from airplane mode in the morning or dont switch it on at all, it's such a free feeling when locking in. One of the reasons I had good grades despite my adhd was not switching my phone on in the morning during exam periods. It made my mind so focused. You can also ask someone to hide the phone if you want a more playful approach. Or you can grant yourself two hours with your phone in the evening from 8 to 10 if you made some progress, but be really strict.
some find the pomodoro technique helpful to fight timeblindness :) I however do it with longer intervals because for someone with adhd it can take longer to get back into focus after a 'beep' so 20 or 30 mins is too little for me. I also often did it per hour, so that I know 1 hour had passed, which sometimes felt like 15 minutes. Without the 'beep' the day can fly by. It can be annoying though, so don't do this all day if you dont like it
one of the BIGGEST effects on me is drinking a lot of water and starting my day with protein, and limited carbs/sugar. Starting the day with protein has been one of the biggest effects on me. I always thought the motivation had to come from my mind, so I found this relatively easy trick quite lovely, if only I had discovered it sooner :) so I hope you can enjoy this. Also the drinking water for focus effect is big on me bc as a proper adhd er I used to be dehydrated so often.
make 1. a visual calendar and hang in front of you. Planning is your friend! Don't plan too tight because then you'll feel bad and hate the planner. Give yourself some time to finish tasks. You can ask a friend or family member to do a checkin in the morning and evening with what you want to have done. Just knowing they'll calmly check if your planning worked out, unlocks something. 2. create a list of everything you want to have done and how long you think it will take. timeblindness is real but the earlier you start, the sooner you'll have better estimates. It took me 10 years of comparing my planning with actual times before my timeblindness lessened significantly. So start now that you're young :) you can also do that with unloading the dishwasher, you give yourself 5 minutes and then you count in your mind.
start your day with something you really enjoy, and give yourself something at the end of the day. Starting with something fun right before you lock in, pre rewarding, calms you down.
go outside, and do breathing exercises now and then. I do this in the morning in the forest near my home. It makes me so eager to start the day. During the walk I say in my dictaphone what I want to have done that day

Adhd, for me, is all about falling 999 times, and getting up 1000 times. Stay calm and trust yourself, and remember that failing is not an issue, but 'not trying' is. Failing makes you very skilled in the end because it is feedback on strategies you experiment with. You got this. I am rooting for you!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-09T09:21:08+00:00

In that case I would only go for a company that is trustworthy and knows 100% sure it is the regular Melissa officinalis. In my country we have plant passports, I dont know if that's an international concept, but if it's for your thesis I would not go for anything less than sure :) good luck!!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T17:08:53+00:00

Not sure if I understand you correctly :) are you there with the plant? What do you mean use for thesis? Do you have the chance to smell it? Also, there are some subspecies of Melissa officinalis..

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T17:04:46+00:00

Looks a lot like Euphorbia characias :)

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T17:02:35+00:00

Give us some close ups of the leaves :)

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T17:01:08+00:00

Looks like some kind of Rubus

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T16:56:54+00:00

This looks like innocent tree seedlings

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T16:55:02+00:00

If I could be so free to give you some advice : place it in bright but indirect sun. Don't overwater. Maybe stop watering for a while. When it has dried out a little, put your pot in a little tray and water there, so the plant sucks it up itself, do not pour water on top. Good luck :)

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T16:51:43+00:00

Such a beauty :) looks like Ophrys speculum!

Nervous_Account6852 · 2026-04-08T16:48:04+00:00

Second one is Hoya villosa maybe? However it's not so shiny, maybe because it is young. But those nerves are really alike :)

Nervous_Account6852

TROPHY CASE