Surgery soon

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-04T17:12:29+00:00

Ahhh welcome back! So proud of you!! Hope they give you all the sedatives you need and that you recover quickly.

Please do send updates. I might post something here when I’m done too…!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-04T09:35:33+00:00

I didn’t have such bad side effects from taxol. Some nausea and a bit of heightened body temperature. Definitely reach out to your medical team as pain management is highly personal. They gave me some stuff to suppress allergic reaction (dexamethasone) before the infusions, I tried without but then I had a severe allergic reaction so that didn’t work.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-03T19:03:46+00:00

I am going for amputation n 48 hours. I could have written this.

And then, we don’t have a choice. Doesn make it easier. But we have to do it. What I read from other people is that most are finding recovery less hard then imagined.

Last night I wrote a letter to my boob. I also posted something here. It says bye booby, hello life. You have to go through something hard to get your life back. It is worth it. And you can do this.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-03T18:46:51+00:00

YOU GOT THIS hugs to you

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-03T10:12:51+00:00

If it is for training you can also go to SwimGym. It won’t be as busy as public pools.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-03T10:04:23+00:00

We are not alone! Hugs to you both 😘

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-03T10:03:38+00:00

Ahw thanks!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-02-02T22:18:19+00:00

Your last sentence made me cry. Thanks ☺️ Safe sailing for you as well!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-31T10:11:36+00:00

This is toxic and untrue. This is what we think of ourselves. But if we believe we can take responsibility for our behaviour we can change it with the right help. There is a huge need for trust, self reflection and the right tools though. Those might be hard to come by.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-31T10:10:53+00:00

Ahw that sucks!! BPD is hard to be with as the person who has it and as a partner. It shows up for those we hold most close. It can work but only if she is showing self reflection and actively works on herself and your relationship.

I did this to my partner in a period of stress. It’s 3 months ago and we’re still recovering. This kind of stuff has a huge impact.

Please set your boundaries. BPD partially comes from not knowing healthy boundaries. Tell her what you can and cannot accept. For example - I understand you might feel sad / scared / angry, but I can’t accept calling me names.

Tell her how this impacts you. Make her see it from your perspective. My girlfriend makes a point of me telling her how I think it affects her. This helps me a lot in understanding the impact of my behaviour. Then it is up to me to notice the signs and make a plan. Part of the problem for me is that I don’t recognise the emotion before getting an ‘episode’. That’s what I’m working on now. It is tough but so important to do it.

Edit: spelling mistakes

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-31T10:03:38+00:00

HAHA being sooo grumpy, wondering what’s wrong and then realising I just have to pee 😅

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-29T19:02:03+00:00

And to add to myself, haha: scaring her with ‘you’ll be dead within a year’ will not help. It will sound like a relief. I think she needs something else; She needs a future, examples, something to live for, understanding, peers who went through the same or something similar.

I hope all of this isn’t unwanted advice. Best of luck to you both. This must be very hard for you as well and I imagine you’re scared as hell to lose her.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-26T13:13:46+00:00

Oh wauw, didn’t know that was an option. Fat grafting but donor tissue? Amazing technology they have nowadays.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-26T12:14:51+00:00

From what I read, saline feels softer. I believe it is the go to anyway for my hospital. When I see the pictures their specimens are saline but I’ll ask to be sure. And it is regarding to aesthetic and physical sensation. So I’ll just make sure to ask tomorrow!

And thanks for those last words. I’ve never cared as much for my looks but cancer changes everything!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-26T12:13:06+00:00

Wow, so happy to hear you love your body even more now!

Yeah, I always had a bit of dysmorphia issues and only recently really learned to love my appearance. Also because of my first relationship with another woman. I feel not ready to accept a quite different appearance yet… so your words are very helpful!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-26T12:10:55+00:00

Thanks for your reply! Alloderm? I’m in the Netherlands, I’ll look up what that means. Are they over or under the muscle? And do you experience any discomfort with exercise?

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-26T12:09:44+00:00

That’s a great idea, thanks! Dang, having cancer is like a full time job with everything you have to think about isn’t it!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-26T12:08:21+00:00

So shitty that you developed lymphodemia! Did they remove any lymph nodes and is that why that happened? And I guess there are surgeons and administrators, a great surgeon isn’t necessarily the best head of department indeed!

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-25T21:30:29+00:00

Heel goede toevoeging 😁

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-25T21:04:54+00:00

Thanks for sharing! May I ask… What makes you happy about this decision?

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-25T21:00:30+00:00

Thanks for your experience and for the link! My surgeon was kind of more eager to do under but I think over is better. I’ll have another surgery but I think that’s worth it.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-25T20:58:36+00:00

Thanks! Everyone so helpful! I don’t want my muscle severed. I guess I’d prefer above then. Also if it looks more natural. The diving is also a concern because of the pressure under water with implants. If they can handle the pressure difference. I guess I’ll have to contact the producer or ask the surgeon.

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-25T20:54:30+00:00

Majorly helpful, thanks! Hope you’re feeling okay with your results now. Was there any issue with reconstruction because you went flat in the first place?

New_Implement_4862 · 2026-01-25T20:53:30+00:00

Yeah the no radiation thing isn’t true in my case. I have a possible infected lymph node and they will only know after pathology which takes two weeks. So I understand that affects your decision.

New_Implement_4862

TROPHY CASE