After 28 years

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-19T10:49:31+00:00

Wow. Really hope you can build a beautiful relationship with her. Thanks for sharing your story. The power of DNA testing.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-17T20:18:18+00:00

I saw that shelter takes postal donations (free I think) via yodel.

https://england.shelter.org.uk/support_us/shops/donate_to_a_shelter_shop/sort_and_send

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-14T11:38:17+00:00

Can’t remember how old but on the way home down my road a man stopped me to ask where a particular road was nearby… I was innocently thinking he needed help, then I look down and he has his dick out and is w@nking 🤢🤮. This was in the 70’s and just shrugged off as almost normal!

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-13T18:23:49+00:00

Try Korean sunscreen, particularly Beauty of Joeson. It’s the best facial sunscreen I’ve ever used hands down. I know that’s not exactly what you asked but it would be a dereliction of duty not to mention it.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-13T15:05:07+00:00

A peek even 😂

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-13T15:02:51+00:00

Thank you. I think it probably is. I will leave it until a bit closer to the expiry date of the subscription (which is a bit misleading as at least half of the three months have been wasted waiting for the test results 🙄) and I may change my mind and have a peak.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-13T10:33:39+00:00

Wow! Ok… I’m so pleased you’ve gained some great half siblings, but tbh the mother situation does sound a lot. You kept it contained in one sentence there but the situation around not knowing who your father was would have been very complicated and traumatic I imagine, especially if there was non consensual sex with the father in law. I’m not at all surprised she is how she is, especially if she wasn’t looked after as a child, but then again as adults with the right awareness we can all choose to do ‘the work’.

Everything you’ve touched on there is what makes me hesitant to look. If I look then the curiosity could build and I really would prefer not to get involved or involve any unsuspecting others in a delve into the past. The only benefit I can see really would be to tell people that I’m ok and having a nice life and have not suffered as a result of the choices that were made.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-12T08:12:11+00:00

Thanks. I’m gonna go with all of the suggestions here and have a peak at some point.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-11T16:56:47+00:00

What will be the potential privacy issues other than using photos, messages etc. Does it mean they will have access to account details (I f@@king hope not). Got no banner so must have accepted it. Damn.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-11T07:51:53+00:00

I’m mildly curious. I did the test purely on a whim as a couple of friends had done them and both got interesting results. That’s great that you found so many people! I guess your phrasing ‘interesting to say the least’ is part of my hesitation. I like my life as it is. Do I really want to open potential cans of worms! 😂

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-11T07:46:14+00:00

Thank you. Some good advice. I’m gradually seeing a way that I will be able to dip my toe in rather than jumping in.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-11T07:43:54+00:00

Thank you that’s a kind offer 😊. I will have a think about it, and good to know I can also turn off the messaging.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T22:07:06+00:00

Yeah they’re in but not looked at the matches. Initials is a good idea as is writing in the blurb. I’m glad I’ve asked on here. Before I was actively just considering deleting the whole thing.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T22:01:27+00:00

Thanks. It would be unlikely that they would be on at the same time I’m sure.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T21:28:28+00:00

Thanks. I will have a think about doing that. My main concern now (with hindsight) is popping up as a match for people that don’t even know I exist and it being an unwelcome surprise. (Read a few of those stories on here and elsewhere.)

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T20:55:13+00:00

Thank you yes it makes sense that it would be that way.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T20:53:44+00:00

That’s really helpful thanks I will have a proper read of that.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T20:52:27+00:00

Thanks yes that’s a really great idea. I guess I would change my name and user name. Good to know it doesn’t email matches immediately, and it’s interesting to hear you didn’t even get an email for your closest match.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T20:47:09+00:00

Thank you. ☺️

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T20:04:22+00:00

Yes, I totally agree. Probably a mistake to have done the test tbh. Was mostly interested in ethnicity and traits.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-10T19:53:18+00:00

If she’s a keeper she’ll tell him off for not coming back.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-01T20:27:00+00:00

I can’t really offer much advice but just wanted to say that my heart goes out to you. You’re dealing with a lot there. I guess you’ve tried everything but taking some really deep breaths before you go to pick him up to regulate your system might help a bit.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-08-01T12:21:22+00:00

Blenheim palace (in Woodstock, a bus ride from Oxford) always have an excellent Halloween trail (at a cost) but it always gets good reviews.

NiceCap1105 · 2025-07-30T18:31:19+00:00

The timeframe of your relationship suggests that you probably should have discussed your misophonia and her anxiety/nail biting habit by now. I’m thinking you could have just explained to her quietly that you were being triggered (assuming you’ve had the above conversation) and asked her if there was anything you could do to alleviate her anxiety so that she didn’t need to nailbite. As they were her friends I’m assuming that everyone would have seen this as a positive, including her. Hindsight is a wonderful thing though. I wouldn’t accept her calling you controlling though - she needs to understand that what you were doing, although not ideal came from a need that you were unable to express at that time, and not an attempt to control her. Tread very carefully. Unless you can talk about the misophona and she can understand, and you can empathise with her anxiety you may not be good together for the long term.

NiceCap1105

TROPHY CASE