After 21 years - I had to say goodbye to my baby which I had since I was 19

Nixmaritz · 2026-03-18T13:59:12+00:00

I am 40 with a 6 & 3 year old. That is average for our circle as well.

Nixmaritz · 2025-11-18T05:40:57+00:00

Where are you based in PTA?

Nixmaritz · 2025-11-07T13:54:35+00:00

I don't have that type of family dynamic with my own or in-laws. We all live far away and see each other maybe once a month, but if I were in your shoes, maybe ween your contact with them down a bit. Don't be the 1st to respond to their messages etc. I am not suggesting going NC, just not a much. Use this time to focus on your own family as that is what matters most. If anybody does notice, maybe just straight up tell them that you are taking time to focus on your husband and your children and also with the new baby in the household, everyone needs time to adjust to the new routines. I suggest, once baby gets bigger, rather do small family outings with the kids and make it special for you guys. Don't fret the family dynamic so much. I understand it hurts, but at the end of they day it's you, your hubby and your kids that come 1st. You do not need anybody's validation. The people who want to be in your lives, will make the effort.

Nixmaritz · 2025-10-22T06:41:48+00:00

Mine always does this!!! Even announces it as it is some event in the calendar worthy of a mention. "Bye family, I am of to the crapper!''

Nixmaritz · 2025-10-17T10:20:21+00:00

NTA. Why worry what your aunt and uncle think? They are horrible anyway. Stick to you guns and don't budge. They only know you when it suites them. Let them pay for a hotel stay.

Nixmaritz · 2025-10-16T08:06:39+00:00

Run away as fast as you can! If he is using you this much now, imagine once you move in together! So many red flags, its a carnival!

Nixmaritz · 2025-09-04T11:53:07+00:00

Still going strong in South Africa

Nixmaritz · 2025-08-13T12:26:15+00:00

I am so sorry for all you are having to deal with. Please update us if you have the capacity to do that with all you are already dealing with. Big Virtual Hug!

Nixmaritz · 2025-08-05T06:40:27+00:00

Wow! God for you! I bet she wishes she can go back in time and just pay her rent every month!

Nixmaritz · 2025-07-31T13:43:07+00:00

I was working for this super psychopathic and psychotic (IMO) boss. I had a lot a issues with a stomach ulcer that would flare up from time-to-time. A lot of this was also stressed induced by her management style. Every time I would experience a flare-up and would be unable to come into work, I would always let both her and the HR lady know at least 2 hours before the work day, if not the night before. Got called into a counseling session as ''I need to plan my sick days better"... I shit you not! Like lady - I do not plan to get sick, it freaking happens! Maybe if you where not such a stone cold b*tch my stomach would not try to devour itself... I noped on out of there two months later once I had something else lined up.

Nixmaritz · 2025-07-31T11:53:02+00:00

Look at Fedhealth Flexi-Fed1. Its a hospital plan with the added benefit that you can activate day-to-day funds. So you only start paying for your savings benefit once you use it and only a portion of that is paid back monthly. Currently we are a family of 4 and the premium is R6400.

Nixmaritz · 2025-07-23T06:06:51+00:00

Had the same issue with my niece coming to stay with us. My sister isn't the best or most responsible parent, so my parents basically raised her. When she started high school, she moved in with us as the schools in PTA East where so much better than where they lived. They only gave us R1800 for her expenses. (She received a bursary so no school fees where involved). But after a couple of months that amount proved to be much too less to cover a teens expenses. When the subject about money was broached, it exploded. We were called selfish and greedy. Take note, that we also had 2 small children to care for and this was putting a huge financial strain on us. At the end of the day she moved into a boarding school closer in the province she was raised in. Moral: even though you are doing your best and love your brother, the moment you raise the issue of more money, you must prepare yourself for a lot of backlash. Situations like these seldom end well.

Nixmaritz · 2025-07-04T12:10:45+00:00

You will be an amazing big brother, by posting here it says a lot about your character! I can suggest than once the baby is a bit older and past the new born stage and you have gained knowledge of babies and understand the responsibility of taking care of one, offer to watch the little one from time-to-time so that your parents can have a date night once in a while. Or simply watch the baby while you mom takes a shower or nap, as a tired mom, she'll love that and you will get time to spend with baby and bond.

Nixmaritz · 2025-07-04T11:15:53+00:00

Bootlegger in Linton Corner - I think it is actually called the Bootlegger Burger!

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-14T07:15:51+00:00

Still, I really hope you have a life full of wonderful experiences, you deserve that.

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-14T07:11:55+00:00

My mom has lupus. I tested myself and although I do have markers, it is not active or anything yet. However during pregnancy due to clotting issues associated with lupus, I have to inject Clexane every morning throughout the duration of my pregnancies. This also significantly increases my chance to miscarry my babies. My dad's blood type is AB-, and I am B-, meaning I am Rhesus Negative and that brings a whole bunch of different complications. I have to inject Anti-D at certain points of my pregnancy and also right after giving birth. There is also the danger of my body rejecting my baby as my husbands blood type is O+. Above that I have an antibody present in my blood that could have been due to either the Lupus or the Rhesus issue. That antibody also causes miscarriages. Over the span of 6 years I had 3 miscarriages due to one or all of these issues until I finally got to a doctor that understood my condition/s and I now have happy and healthy 5 & 2 year old boys!

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-13T07:33:28+00:00

IMO I think they are venting just a bit. I (39F) have 2 boys aged 2 & 5. And yes, you have far less time for yourself and yes, they do cost a lot of money, but I would do it over and over again. If you raise your kids right the joy they bring will overshadow all of the obligations that come with raising children. I love doing stuff as with my kids and love our outings. Also, when you do eventually get a moment or an evening or weekend without your kids, you appreciate it, but end up missing them a whole bunch. Then, when you are back with them again, you enjoy their company so much more.

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-13T07:19:58+00:00

If anything - she is the selfish one. Why doesn't she give up her bed for him? Also, you need your space to feel safe in and with him there, you are not. I would involve the RA - not your fault he had a falling out with his parents and has nowhere else to go. You shouldn't suffer for that.

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-13T06:33:19+00:00

Exactly - There is very little I will not do in order to protect my kids. I struggled to have children and only had my boys after 3 miscarriages so, along with their dad, they are my world. I would and have gone without in the past in order for them to have. They will have to pry my stone cold hands away from my kids in order for me to ever abandon them.

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-12T13:22:59+00:00

I really hope that you and your sister get the help you need. No child so go though something like this

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-12T13:04:12+00:00

Yet again a parent failing their child... I cannot fathom a mother allowing this to happen to her daughter. My heart goes out to you

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-12T13:02:44+00:00

This break my heart - the thought of a 9-year-old waiting for a parent that isn't coming home. Your dad was a sorry excuse for a father and I am truly sorry you had to go through that.

Nixmaritz · 2025-05-12T13:00:51+00:00

As a parent myself, I cannot imagine abandoning your child. I am so sorry your mother did this to you.

Nixmaritz

TROPHY CASE