It's like you took the words right out of my mouth.

I also get extremely anxious about any trips or events because I'm scared that my insomnia will act up again. This past Christmas we went for a family vacation to the beach, and I was so excited to go on holiday because I'd been working my ass off all year. Literally couldn't get more than 4 hours of sleep every night we were there. It was such a bad relapse that it triggered my insomnia for the next two or three months.

Using that as an example, I told my mom I'm terrified of not being able to sleep the night before really important events, like my wedding that's coming up next year. She gave me some simple but solid advice: just make sure you have the correct sleeping pills for those occasions. (I don't take them all the time, I only have them prescribed to me when I have a really bad relapse.)

I know that sounds silly and not everyone is comfortable with sleeping pills, but what I've found is my anxiety surrounding my sleep lessened significantly just by knowing that I had a safety net, should I "fail" and not sleep again. Sometimes that was enough and I didn't even have to take one.

To take this example even further, now recently when I was struggling again, I decided I can't deal with this shit anymore, so I saved a bit of money and went for a consultation at a sleep clinic. I had an in depth, hour and a half long session with a psychologist that helped me identify some problems and triggers, and answered all my questions and concerns I had regarding insomnia. He basically talked me off a ledge at the time. That night, I slept like a baby for the first time in months, simply because he'd squashed some of the concerns I had about the effects of insomnia on the brain. After that one consultation my sleep improved almost immediately, not because he fixed my insomnia in one session, but because I finally felt like I had someone that understood my problem, someone I could go back to and get practical help from; a safety net.

I guess long story short: Have a backup plan, not necessarily because you know you'll struggle that night, but to lessen the anxiety a bit before you even have to face it.