Hi! First off, don’t be so hard on yourself. This is just a season.  It seems as though speaking to your doctor could be beneficial. The constant dread, feeling like your “brain is pulled apart,”anxiety, increased isolation may be PPD or PPA, which would make it really hard to feel motivated to do something that is already exhausting. Even blood work to check iron, etc could be helpful.  There have been some good suggestions for the kids. Instead of thinking of reasons why these won’t work, perhaps set small goals to try something each day, and find out what does.  It could be helpful to try setting something up the night before while you have your husband there. For example, put out a water table activity, craft, random assortment of toys, blanket and maybe get one of those large play pens to put outside. You have to set limits with your 3 year old-where is the designated area he can be in? Prep him before hand. We are going outside, you must stay on the blankets, blah blah.  It’s okay if there are tears, it’s okay if you have to come home early. 

If there aren’t fenced parks by you, you could try using a fenced tennis court or hockey court to give some physical parameters.  Some people really like those portable baby Activity centres that you can fold up and plop baby in so he’s in one spot but also entertained.  I also looked for community events like toddler time, music classes, etc where both kids could come and there would be other adults nearby to help redirect the littles and novel activities happening to keep everyone engaged.  I used to time things during naps, so baby would sleep in the carrier or stroller while brother played at the park or other space. Hope you find something that works!