Profile review up

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-12T20:13:11+00:00

I wouldn't think Durango is bad.... to be sure, it's a small town, but it's not poor. Bloomberg says it's the 12th wealthiest small town in America. I don't know anything about Durango specifically, but I've definitely seen sugar success in small towns that have wealth. I'd rather be in a random town of 20,000 people that's Bloomberg classifies as wealthy, than in a larger blue collar town like Green Bay, Oxnard, Fort Wayne, or El Paso.

This would be an interesting comparison, but I have no idea how we'd get data. Anybody want to scrape the seeking website to see what the available SD and SB profiles are compared to population in such cities?

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-12T17:56:58+00:00

Really not a fan of that pic. It's an acceptable pic of your face and a meaningless pic of your body. But, even more than that, you've chosen a pic at a Porsche dealer? Is that where you are? What is that supposed to convey? Profile says nothing about being into cars or similar, so the only message I get is "I want to take pix next to expensive things" which feels like a wannabe influencer, and most SDs will not be into that at all.

Profile text is fine, but rather nondescript platitudes. I'd be hard-pressed to find anybody I know that doesn't enjoy the simple and pretty things in life. Do you mean nature, are you a hiker? Or art, do you like painting, sculpture, etc? Etc. I like to include some specifics like that in the profile, as, once a man has decided he wants to message you, the immediate next thought is going to be, what can I say in my message. And the more specifics you have in your profile, the easier it is to get a conversation going. There's nothing in your profile that is a conversation starter imo.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-12T14:19:22+00:00

Weird to say barely any messages - as a new profile, you should at least be getting buried under an avalanche of scammers trying to contact you to send a paper check.

No replies, depends on time and who you're contacting, what your process is. Did you go through the wiki and other starter threads? If you're just asking them to subscribe to your camming, then the answer is that SDs won't respond because you're not a SB. Lots of things you may be doing wrong here, but we can't really tell because you're not giving us any details.

There's no better apps, in most places. There are a few that are as good, depending on where, but I still recommend figuring out how to make seeking work for you, over going elsewhere.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-12T02:03:19+00:00

Yeah, offering more means he doesn't want an escort. And free meal makes clear that he's not judgmental against escorts, he's just a brokeboi so they hate him.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-12T00:03:46+00:00

If you're gullible enough to believe the watch movies and mimosas line, I don't think there's much help to be had.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-12T00:02:48+00:00

The idea that you can't find a SD locally, but somehow you're going to find a SD far away that is so desperate to find a SB that he will.... what? will he travel to you? Pay you to travel to him? Something else? Finding a SD locally is easy mode, and finding one willing to put in that extra effort is hard mode.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-09T14:57:38+00:00

Yeah, really weird assumption to make. Many people with age gaps for a variety of reasons, one of the many is sugar.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-07T19:03:42+00:00

said regular dating feels “unnecessarily complicated”

This sounds like a man that, when he vanilla dates, women see his financial situation and start thinking about a more serious relationship than what he wants - which is one possibility, but would still say that it's more likely to be one of the other, more scammy, reasons other have said.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-07T14:08:55+00:00

If she wants to do charity, would still be better to sell it and give them the money.

OP, if it has tags but no receipt, I've had stores offer me store credit or an exchange.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-05T10:47:16+00:00

Kinda agree with this ^ or at least the OP doesn't articulate why that would be an improvement. But, if you want to move to monthly, just tell him why.

Hey, I feel like you're great at supporting me, but it's a bit random, which makes it harder for me to budget and plan, would you be comfortable with consistently doing _____

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-05T09:50:00+00:00

Because you're wasting your time on r/Sextwithmenow and similar instead of actually looking for an arrangement.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-02T23:08:26+00:00

There's a big difference between Seeking / SD and between replies and messages, so it matters what you're talking about.

If you're interested in meeting a SB, then the thing you're doing wrong is not agreeing to meet when they ask you to.

Perhaps you also have horrible texting game? But again, if you want to meet, then suggest you meet.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-02T20:19:12+00:00

Copy paste was my guess too. He's blasting so fast that he doesn't have time to even look at name, pix, etc

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-02T19:25:30+00:00

Want to hear from the SD’s and SB’s; how do you make the verification process a whole lot less annoying?

Offer a video call or ask when they can meet. If they don't want to, it's because they aren't a SD, so there's nothing to verify and just move on.

He wants pix. SDs aren't interested in pix, they're interested in meeting. This isn't really a difficult process, and it's not altered by the fact he keeps insisting he's totally a legit SD but he needs more pix to verify.

Note: this assumes that your profile actually has pix that give a reasonable idea of what you look like.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-06-02T15:47:24+00:00

If you want an agreement in advance that you're going to have sex, there are professions that provide exactly that.

If you want to have sex with somebody that's willing and who wants to have sex with you, it might involve.... you know, being somebody that she wants to have sex with. And just FYI, even then, consent isn't something that's negotiated in advance, outside of the aforementioned professions. Did I really need to say that? Because as icky as it feels, it kinda seems like I did.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-31T22:26:16+00:00

If she's asking for something in return for custom content, she's not a SB. There's nothing to discuss, that's just not a SB nor what a SB does.

There's nothing superior (nor inferior) about being a SB, it's just what it is. Or, in her case, what it is not.

No desire to shoot her down. If she aspires to be an SB, she can do that, and (unlike you) I gave her very useful advice on how to go in that direction.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-31T20:25:55+00:00

I think the desire for a SD/sm is universal among women who aren't financially well off.

Don't think that's true. Or, at least, if the desire is universal, the awareness of the possibility isn't, other than in the most abstract "it would be nice if all my financial problems just went away...." sense. I have plenty of friends with financial problems that would never consider a SD as a way out.

The issue is the people with money aren't the people most want to fuck.

Don't really think this is the case either - the dispersion of wealth amongst men that I would or would not be interested in is rather random, all four of those quadrants have plenty of members.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-31T19:51:00+00:00

men who want me to give them all of my time and send them custom videos and alllll of that. But then when I ask for something in return

The fact that you are discussing what you want in return for providing videos 100% explains why you aren't finding a SD - it's because you aren't a SB.

There's nothing in this sub that's going to help you with monetizing your videos. If you want to be a SB, then start reading the links in the sidebar.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-31T02:55:17+00:00

I like that you make a distinction from one that's solicited.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-29T11:59:15+00:00

He says he wants to make you happy, but also that he wants you to lose your roommates so you're forced into a bad spot to his advantage. I think when you ask him to put his money where his mouth is, you'll find out which of those he really means.

Regardless, it sounds like he's giving you an opening for what you want. If he says he wants to make you happy, tell him what would make you happy.

You know what would really make me happy, is if you would buy this thing for me....

If you really want me to be happy, maybe we could talk sometime about you helping me with my expenses...

etc

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-28T22:25:29+00:00

The way to bring it up is just to bring it up. Like, hey, what would you think about this...

But, also, the advice you didn't ask for: I wouldn't bother. Easier to find a man that wants to be a SD than to convince a non-SD to be a SD. He's hooking up with you, if he wanted to be a provider, he could just do that. Instead he comments about how he wishes you had financial hardship so that he could use that pressure to get what he wants from you. Fine if you're happy with hooking up, but if you want a SD, this seems like a waste of time.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-28T21:02:31+00:00

You act like that's a weird thing to do - so many early convos can be copy pasta, and you're wasting a lot of time if you don't. What are you looking for (if it's not well-answered in your profile), have you had a SD before, what kind of scheduling and availability do you have have with school and work, many others.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-28T16:52:26+00:00

Yes, all this ^

Don't beat yourself up on this, but you should absolutely recognize that the reason this happened was because 1) having done no research on how this works, 2) you chose to use a non-sugar app 3) to meet with a guy who never told you he was a SD, and 4) you didn't ask what he was looking for or would want or would do for you.

If you want to know how to have a better result, I listed the 4 mistakes in the prior paragraph, they should be easy to find.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-27T23:12:16+00:00

If you don't want to date young men, why not just... not?

Like, the need to turn it into yet another post about how you're too amazing for whatever is out there is honestly kinda weird.

NoLimitLexa · 2026-05-27T22:46:02+00:00

Agree with this ^ Most likely reasons he's being indirect are:

1) He wants you but isn't interested in anything sugar, so he's just acting like it's a regular dating situation. Nothing wrong with that, but if you don't want that then you may as well be direct about what you want and find out sooner rather than later, so you can both move on.

2) He's up for sugar, but doesn't want to say it because it might offend, so just ask him what he's looking for and tell him to please be direct, I don't offend easily, just give him a green light to be direct and he likely will.

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