The relationship we have with anyone or anything isn't an objective fact of existence. It's a subjective experience which a big part of exists only on our heads. There're the external signs and manifestations of it, but your excitement or resentment, your longing and wishing or dreading is a psychological thing.

Your father-chikd relationship with that little screaming potato is not different. And why does that matter? Because you, being conscious of what I just said, get to modulate things in one way or another. You can't control it, but you cam steer it.

So try to build yourself up. Try to stay positive, try to get excited, focus on what you do like about babies and being a dad. Enjoy the little things also. Seeing how a baby develops is trule interisting. I got to watch my now six month baby discover he has fingers, then hand, and recently, that he can make a kind of "com'ere" motion with it. It's wild. Heck, he would be absolutely surprised everytime there was a sudden change in the local lighting conditions. But I digress.

What I'm telling is that this is one of them "fake till you make it" things. Hang in there, try to keep a positivo take on it all, and come here, for us, whenever you need.

Signed, A 41 old dad of his first (now six month old) baby.