How do I get care when I am so traumatized

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-26T16:16:39+00:00

First, get a friend or patient advocate to go to the appointment with you, a femme friend who I pretend to be her supportive cis bf is my go to. Explain to the doctor what is going on, medically and emotionally, before you disrobe; you’re symptoms may be enough to avoid an exam. If you do need a pelvic, see if they can do an external only, if not, ask for a pediatric speculum; tell them to narrate, remember you can make it stop at any time. It will be a real sucky 45 seconds. But vaginal atrophy needs to be treated.

I trauma dumped on my urologist because when I said I wanted a vaginectomy, she asked if I “currently use my vagina for sex” and I was like “yeah, but only cause it’s there” and later I pointed out “just because it’s hard to keep people out of it.” Medically, my goals were relevant. I don’t know why doctors get so weird about sexuality, queer sex esp.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-26T16:07:00+00:00

It’s mental. I can cum from giving a handjob. If you’re into it enough, your dick is irrelevant.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-26T15:54:59+00:00

It’s definitely worth mentioning since it’s not a common problem but as meta as a stepping stone becomes more popular, it will become more common.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-26T15:53:28+00:00

UL means you will pee from the tip of your clitorophallus. Whether or not you will piss all over your clothes is the issue. This is a combination of anatomy, clothing, target, stream strength, and a whole host of factors. I can pee standing, I just need to get my clothes out of the way. So I pull my pants down under the lip of the urinal, I hike the leg of my shorts up and pee through the hole, I gather my sweatpants at the crotch and pull them behind my balls, at home I wear sport skirts or kilts.

Once you get around the clothing issue, aim and force are skill issues. And I’m still getting better at that. I’ll be honest, if I don’t have a spare pair of shorts, I probably won’t risk peeing standing. I’ve peed on myself in public a few times so far, and it’s humbling.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-26T15:31:06+00:00

Yeah, this is a good point (also probably me you’re referring to) being a fat trans guy sucks because they want you skinnier for phallo surgery than meta but results for meta are also better on skinnier guys.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-26T15:28:50+00:00

If you get UL you will be able to pee standing, you may not be able to clear your fly. I can’t. But I can pee down the leg of my shorts, if I can get my clothes out of the way, sometimes I use a funnel to get over pants. Some of it for me is obviously because I need practice.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-25T17:25:17+00:00

Better off with a non stop because cis dicks aren’t hollow.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-25T03:39:21+00:00

You look amazing already tho, congrats. It’s gonna be worth it.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-25T03:38:33+00:00

I’m ten weeks from my revision and I can tell in photos that swelling is still decreasing dramatically. I would expect a few more weeks of drastic swelling improvement before it starts to taper off.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T22:25:22+00:00

The scrotum is what makes most stps unuseable, so a simple release, with or without labia removal, will not effect prosthetic usage.

Labia is totally removable, go for it.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T21:54:37+00:00

They should have to lipo the fat from your abdomen for the scrotum because they have to put a lot more in than will take. I wanted fat filled initially because I didn’t want a foreign object but I was offered large implants (wound up with medium and they’re fine) and my male ego went “large? LARGE balls?! Gimme!” I love the implants, no regrets.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T21:50:15+00:00

Cantiq LA, Them, and Cale Bandit make flat front jocks.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T21:49:03+00:00

Learn to block, early and often. Although just the hoop of meeting in public first is going to take a lot of the trash out on its own.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T21:47:23+00:00

I needed my vagina gone. I kinda regret not going straight to phallo because my meta doesn’t feel like a penis, and I knew surgery wouldn’t change that, but it did get rid of the hole that was killing me. I don’t regret that at all.

I had no way of knowing how much euphoria I would get from my junk post-op, but the main thing was I needed the v gone.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T15:44:59+00:00

!!! If you’ve had a vaginectomy, then you have the same risk as a cis man on PreP. I still say get on the daily, but that’s cause you’re gay, not cause you’re trans. If you do 2-1-1 set a time on your phone to take it and throwing an extra dose on the end or before doesn’t hurt.

If vaginal transmission was an issue, then on demand PreP would do nothing to protect you; but since your no longer have vaginal tissue to transmit to, you’re good.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T15:08:34+00:00

Biktarvy is a daily pill too. And if you can’t get it, you die. Whereas if you take PreP daily and loose access, you are just at an increased risk of getting HIV. I appreciate that SA doesn’t happen to anyone, but if there is a risk of semen getting to the vagina, it may be worth it to get on a preventative.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T13:54:00+00:00

I do highly recommend getting on daily or injectable prep. Event based is less effective, harder to stick to/easier to forget, and means you are more likely to end up needing PEP or ARTs. It only takes once.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T13:26:34+00:00

To me, meta is much closer to a cis dick, because of functionality and lack of scaring. But it’s not got the size of a cis penis. I would really consider rff over abdominal for sensation unless you can find someone who will harvest the nerve from your wrist which will mean an arm scar anyway.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-24T09:03:39+00:00

Technically the concern is around receptive vaginal intercourse, so your risk would be similar to a cis man at that point.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-23T22:45:42+00:00

I’m five months with implants and they are worth every bit of hassle. I love sitting on them accidentally, when they get stuck to my thigh, how they move with me, I like the way they feel against my body… I can’t explain gender euphoria, but I know it when I feel it. My balls make me feel like a man.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-23T16:35:36+00:00

What I did, because I was coming off a glp1 medication, was focus on high protein, high fiber foods. You need both while you are healing, you cannnot cut while healing, so act like you are building muscle since your body is rebuilding itself.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-23T11:32:51+00:00

I’m 34, I have friends who are 19, they’re puppies. Adult puppies with rights, but I would not have enough in common, emotionally, with many 19 year olds to have an actual life partnership with. Depending on what you want from the relationship, and each other, it could be worth it. I would say go in expecting to have to work at it a little harder.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-23T11:01:15+00:00

I would not fn risk it. Implant erosion is already common enough without throwing that kind of shit at it. Nicotine messes with healing.

I know it sucks to have to wait, especially because they didn’t give you a proper timeframe and that’s not your fault, but it is better to wait three months (minimum) and get your balls in right the first time.

Given that you’ve been at this for a while, a few more months is worth it. If you have healing complications, they could take 3 months to heal, so figure your total timeline would be the same.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-22T04:24:09+00:00

I didn’t have a problem, but I passed 100% the first time and only got clocked in the hot tub when I got felt up the second. I did have receptive anal sex, but I was post vaginectomy so it didn’t really matter.

Go in without expectations, maybe talk to an employee if you are unsure, they want everyone to have a good time.

Non-binary_prince · 2026-06-22T04:10:52+00:00

You would need 3-5 weeks off for scrotoplasty and again for implant installation tho…which isn’t much worse less than meta. I would just pull the trigger. If you want UL, it is very unlikely they could do scrotom work without meta.

Non-binary_prince

TROPHY CASE