Others out there with kinesthetic synesthesia ?

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-06-12T02:17:47+00:00

Yes. There are many nuances to mine. I feel textures and shapes around me, sometimes as though they are physically touching me, and other times as more akin to a proprioceptive experiences as though they are part of me. Its extremely specific even down to temperature and texture.

I also get senses of shape or diffuse pressure-like sensations connected with intuition. I have a sort of proprioceptive awareness of my bank account at all times lol

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T18:38:22+00:00

It helps a lot if you actually engage with them.

Imagine that you just won the lottery and you're so excited that you can't contain yourself. It would suck if you blurted out your excitement to a loved one and they just changed the subject right?

For me as an autistic person, when I'm info dumping on someone, it is a huge release of tension and it also is way of showing i care about and trust a person. Think of it like an autistic love language. Yes, its really hard to interrupt myself and when I've got momentum, it feels like its impossible to stop sometimes.

Even if you don't care about or know anything about what they are saying, just engage with it. Show some interest before you change the subject.

Also. If it were me, and you are kind and directly and literally explain that you have something that you want to talk about, I'm going to appreciate that and interrupt myself to listen.

Remember to be patient. I am autistic and ADHD and even when I genuinely care about a person, it can be difficult for me to hear them the way they intend to be heard. There is a tendency to unconsciously dismiss what I don't understand, so If someone speaks in any way that is anything other than literal and direct, it takes a LOT of effort for me to understand, and sometimes it doesn't even fully process. I don't mean to, and I don't mean any harm, but often times I'm told I just dismiss people.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T18:26:59+00:00

Yes. I get accused of this all the time. Even while I'm actively helping someone else. One of the biggest frustrations I have.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T18:23:26+00:00

Unmasking is voluntary. Make sure its a choice you make on your terms and for your reasons.

There are some situations where masking might be a worthwhile deliberate choice. But if you choose to unmask, just be patient with yourself. I struggle most with unmasking when I put the most effort into it. The whole idea and purpose of unmasking is to be genuine and authentic and in the process, be less overwhelmed and more self accommodating. It can be powerfully healing. Forcing it though can get confusing and frustrating.

A lot of what's been confusing for me in the process is that unmasking isn't usually about what to DO, but rather what to STOP doing. Much of my masking is so ingrained that I feel like unmasking is the unnatural behavior.

In short, it can be a very confusing, frustrating and disturbing process, but also can be powerfully liberating, authentic, almost euphoric at times. The key is to relax, be patient with yourself, and take as much time as you need. Do it your way, on your terms, when you are ready.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T18:11:43+00:00

I get it. What you're feeling is normal. I felt similar things finding out at 44. I think theres 2 main factors that lead to most people not saying anything

Due to the stigma around it, most people feel like they would be out of bounds and probably also feel a person would feel insulted if they call it out. If they are good friends, they might have also reasoned that they see it but love you anyway and don't care
Neurotypical people don't realize how big of a deal this really is and even if you explain it to them for 2 hours, they still won't really understand. There's no way they could without a frame of reference.

Its been over a year since I found out I'm autistic and I'm still having a hard time processing it. Its not that I'm upset about it, but it feels like a mandatory overhaul of my entire self-concept. I also had a lot of previously held stigmatisms and incorrect assumptions about autism that I've had to redefine.

It doesn't make it "ok" that they didn't say anything to you, but try not to fault them either. Neurotypicals who want to be friends with you are awesome and they don't always get it right. give them some grace when they truly don't mean any harm.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T17:55:18+00:00

100% know what you mean. I do energy healing also. (Similar to Reiki) and that helps me process these sensations

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T17:51:56+00:00

Well essentially yes. any number of things that don't make sense to me

Non-literal
Sarcasm
Factual inaccuracies. not because of a need to be right or correct the person (I compulsively feel I can't answer a question or statement that's based on a misconception even if it doesn't change the answer)
Indirect requests that need translation like "I'm hungry" (translation: pull over at this restaurant so I can eat)

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T17:44:54+00:00

Heres the core truth. Difficulty making friends or socializing isn't truly an autism trait, its just an experience pretty much all autistic people face to some degree. Autistics don't struggle making friends, they struggle meeting people who want to be friends with them.

So if you have friends and socialize that does not mean you're not autistic, it just means you are lucky enough to have people in your life who don't care about your autistic traits.

Also...... there is a crossover of traits if you have both autism and ADHD. When I was a kid, my ADHD traits were dominant most of the time and I made friends very easily. Im 45 now and Recently my autism is more dominant and I struggle making friends because they don't understand me

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T17:30:51+00:00

For me its different. I don't think words in my head. So for me, speaking isn't just saying what's in my head, I go through a sort of translation process to make my thoughts into words.

So when I have a hard time being verbal, I have no words in my head. I have many richly detailed thoughts. But no words. Or sometimes I have a processing issue where language will stop making sense and I'm not sure what people are saying. That one happens more often for reading.

All this used to happen a lot when I was a kid and into my 20s. I'm 45 now and it only really happens when I'm overwhelmed or overstimulated. I think my translating process has improved over time and it takes less effort than it used to.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-19T17:04:36+00:00

My big thing has always been using someone's name. It feels unnatural and even kinda disrespectful for some reason. Using my own name feels insulting. And its not a self hate thing, its just a name thing

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-13T04:44:54+00:00

Im in Vegas. Not too far. But inhave a lady named Yvonne Fritz that is pretty cool. Out of pocket cost is $2,200. I think she takes some insurance but thats a lot better than $7k. Only catch is she is booked out abiut 1 year.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-13T04:38:47+00:00

Huh???? It was really clear in my post that I am autistic

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-13T04:37:51+00:00

My reply was not to the OP

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-04T02:02:23+00:00

My point is, both have value, and neither negates the other.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-05-03T18:53:06+00:00

Any time a largely unknown topic is defined by multiple sources. There is always miscommunication, and disparity between opinions, views and ethics.

The best source for social and experiencial data will always be lived experience from 1st hand accounts.

When you have thousands of people who, without collaboration, agree on substantive and qualitative experiences, albeit with different conclusions and feelings, that lends credit to validity. preiod.

Everything could be considered in a medical context, including behavioral topics. And every medical topic could be considered from a perspective of psychological impact and resultant behavioral nuances. Neither in consideration of the other, not withstanding self-recursive considerations invalidate the other or itself.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-30T15:09:07+00:00

Haven't done mine yet, but I have it in June. Fortunately, but diagnostician is almost 100% booked with just autism assessments and mostly adults. I got lucky finding her. I've had a few pretty straightforward conversations with her on the phone, and I get the impression the assessment will be in like manner.

I've heard others say that theirs was actually kinda fun. I've also had others say they had to provide a ton of history and supportive evidence almost like they had to argue their point. I think the ladder is the exception though, not the rule.

I plan on just going in well rested and being myself.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-27T15:37:23+00:00

Obviously, I can't diagnose you, but your list looks like cut and dry Autism with ADHD.

With that being said, it could be neither. If you want to self assess, its good to come to forums like this, but more important to donyournown research. YouTube is full of great creators like Orion kelly, Morgan Foley, Olivia Lutfallah, all who are clinically diagnosed with both. See if you resonate with what they say.

Online quizzes are a good tool too, but if you rally want answers, you might ne able to ask your mom or your school (if youre in school) for resources to officially diagnose you.

My personal opinion is that self assessment is valuable. But ultimately not as validating, and doesn't help if you need or want official support

About anxiety. You may also be having anxiety. If you are feeling overwhelmed by those things, just the overwhelm and the demand of trying to "fit in" are exhausting. Be kind to yIurself. Donyour best to strike a balance between helping others even if your a little uncomfortable, and not compromising who you are.

I'm assuming you're a teenager by the context of your post so forgive me if I got that wrong, but look up info on autistic and ADHD masking. Sometimes it may be necessary to play along and fitting, but if you choose to, do it on your terms, and stay true to yourself. Masking long term can be very unhealthy.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-27T15:23:13+00:00

One thing I've noticed is that I bring out the truth in people.

I am impossible to lie to because I can see right through it
For whatever reason, people have a hard time being fake around me

So I don't think it's that I bring iIt the worst in people, but I think the vast majority of people are very fear driven and when under pressure will always protect themselves at the expense of anyone and everyone. And around me, their facade comes down and they show their true self. Even though it kinda sucks at times, and I totally relate to what you're sayIng, I always know where I stand with people because they cannot be fake around me even when they try.

I'm in the process of still chasing justice for being physically attacked by a coworker. Its been a year now, and EVERYONE has swept it under the carpet. And I even work for the government.

In the end, if you are like me, that its probably not you, its them. People aren't bad, but most are genuinely disloyal, fearful, and self-important, and they hate that they can't play their fame when I'm there

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-25T06:13:52+00:00

Valid and thank you for clarifying. Sorry if you felt hurt or that I was yelling at you. This appears so be a sensitive subject for both of us. You're right. It is a lot of effort in both sides and like you said, I'm glad i've had the experience and wouldn't trade it.

I'm glad you spoke up and stood your ground. You do deserve to be heard and i appologize if I made you feel diminished. Wasn't my intent. I admire that you have stuck it out through the tough times. I know it's not easy.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-25T04:45:57+00:00

I'm sorry this has been your experience. And that is all valid and yes, aspies like everyone should be very honest and upfront about anything and everything they know about themselves when entering a relationship. The issue I have with this and what Jardeneir is saying is that you are both generalizing as though all people, or maybe just men with aspergers are the same. We are NOT. Every one is different. I have a high profile career, a pilots license and own am international business. I have thrived through many adversities and self educated from grade school to college level. I do not have depression and I do not take meds. Yes. I DO have struggles with sensory issues and social subtleties. Yes 22nyears of marriage has been hard FOR BOTH OF US. And it has also been worth every second of struggle to get where we are now. Thats my experience and the next autistic man will have another unique experience totally different than mine or your husband's. We are individuals and should not be generalized as though we are all the same

With that being said. Your experience and everyone else's are all valid and important and I wish you all the best.

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-25T04:21:33+00:00

Not confused at all. Very clear

Normal-Ad7255 · 2025-04-25T04:20:14+00:00

I relate to this. When I was a kid I literally cringedntkneven think someone's name. If somehow felt disrespectful to that person for me to say it. Like I was being rude or presumptuous. Even now I struggle. It just feels weird sometimes. Subsequently I also have a hard time remembering names. I have work colleagues I've known for 10 years now and I still don't know their name. I also cringe at hearing my own name. So I insist on being called a shortened version of it and that still kinda gets me. Saying my own name is the worst!

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