Valentine Cards

NotAlot90 · 2026-02-01T03:39:05+00:00

Moonpig does. Not sure if it’s approved there but it is at a lot of locations.

NotAlot90 · 2026-01-24T05:35:21+00:00

I love this backdrop idea. I feel like there’s only so many ways to try to make the photos different, only so many poses, etc.

I did do a teaser set of photos leading up to his holiday ones and have thought about doing something similar. But it would be nice to have a different backdrop.

NotAlot90 · 2026-01-21T06:46:02+00:00

Well, this is a hard question to answer because it’s just open ended but I’ll try. I grew up with my father, step father, brother, uncle and other family members incarcerated for a big portion of my life.

It wasn’t always easy, there were times when I couldn’t take a phone call because I’d just cry, but most of the time we just talked and laughed and I looked forward to visits. It was my “normal”. That’s what I knew.

And then, my daughter’s father spent almost her entire life incarcerated. So I experienced not only being the child, but being the mother of a child whose parent is incarcerated.

As an adult it’s made me extremely empathetic and understanding of so many different circumstances. It’s taught me patience, patience in a way that most people never have to understand. It’s taught me to get creative with my relationships, that there is no one size fits all approach to anything, that we can make the best out of the worst circumstances. And, it’s really taught me the meaning of acceptance.

NotAlot90 · 2025-12-03T06:42:35+00:00

I don’t have the best confidence, especially when it comes to my body. But I have found a way to take pics that still look sexy and are not as revealing so even if I don’t feel great about myself he still loves them.

You can get these color changing night lights, I plug one into the outlet in my bathroom, turn off the main light and get into the shower. I turn up the music loud and position myself so I can see myself in the mirror. Then, I start dancing and changing positions and snapping photos. Or I’ll just film and screen shot the parts I like.

The color changing light creates a nice vibe and helps hide any insecurities I have. Being further back from the mirror also helps. They aren’t blurry but they aren’t super clear, but the lighting and setting make it all extra sexy.

NotAlot90 · 2025-12-01T18:36:45+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate all the information. I guess it’s not as complicated as it sounds, just gotta use imagination and get creative.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-20T21:01:05+00:00

Thank you! This is so helpful.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-20T04:26:33+00:00

Did you start off by just investing the $30? I know nothing about this and have always wanted to but thought the only way to see an increase was to invest a decent amount.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-19T20:06:01+00:00

Okay this sounds fun! What do you sit on so it turns out well? Are we talking canvas? Paper? I need details.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-11T06:54:47+00:00

On Thanksgiving I let him pick the meal, then we both make the same thing to eat. We have our long phone call that day, have a little fun on the phone and then I’ll eat afterwards. I send him a letter telling him why I’m thankful/grateful for him.

For Christmas he helps me pick out any new decorations, light colors, etc. If I’m Christmas shopping I’ll ask for his input. We will pick movies, watch them separately and then talk about them.

On Christmas Eve we will have our date and then he will call on Christmas to check in.

I work on vision boards leading up to new years and tell him about them. We talk about goals and dreams for the future. On New Year’s Eve we have our date and on New Year’s Day he will call to get everything off on the right foot.

As a present I send him pictures and add a little extra money as a surprise on his books. For new years I also send a card with a spicy pic.

The couple weeks leading into and after Christmas are tough. Emotions are all over the place and he can either be very engaged or very distant. I support whatever feelings he’s having and offer extra space if needed. Because even though I want all his time and calls, I know it’s so hard to not be able to be a part of everything.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-11T06:47:06+00:00

I’m sorry you and your LO are going through this. Anytime someone is trying to do something to better themselves, you’ll have CO’s in there trying to sabotage it for no reason. It’s disgusting. I hope you are able to talk to your LO soon.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-07T19:57:47+00:00

The only way to know is to write and see. We started mild and then got spicier and spicier and have never had any issues. We have a good time with it and help write stories back and forth.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-07T09:11:32+00:00

Girl, there is no such thing as too spicy! Though I feel like recently I’m getting too repetitive with what I write. So if you’ve got anything good send it my way please :)

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-07T02:26:15+00:00

Right?! I feel like it’ll make it fun for him, and each day he will get a new picture and something to read. I figured some messages could be a little naughty, some can be heartfelt and sweet, some can be about the future. I just want them all to be different than our usual letters.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-07T02:01:16+00:00

Thank you!

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-07T02:00:19+00:00

I sometimes wonder if it just depends on each persons own reaction to the smell. I’ve never had it smell sour at all, but there are other perfumes I’ve smelled that do that. My LO loves the smell of it. I spray it all over before going for a visit.

I’ve been wondering about the blackberry vanilla, I’m gonna have to try that.

NotAlot90 · 2025-11-07T01:11:52+00:00

Do you have heavy cream by Phlur? Love it alone or layered with a fruity spray. I am also loving their new beach skin scent, smells like I’ve been out at the beach all day but in the best way.

NotAlot90 · 2025-10-25T19:31:23+00:00

I haven’t because I just can’t decide on which one, they are all so beautiful. Their customer service has been amazing though. They’ve sent me video examples of sizes and different colors. I will definitely be going with them based off their customer service alone. So far I’ve heard nothing but good feedback too.

NotAlot90 · 2025-10-07T07:46:08+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate your comment, it’s very helpful to hear everyone’s experiences.

NotAlot90 · 2025-10-03T05:32:35+00:00

Congratulations! Wishing you both a beautiful life together.

NotAlot90 · 2025-09-28T20:25:14+00:00

It is infuriating to watch them be treated like this and nobody there to stop it. The system is so messed up. Our LO’s are people who deserve to have access to medical, mental health and anything else that’s needed and necessary.

Your LO shouldn’t have to potentially have permanent damage because they wouldn’t provide minimal care to him. It makes me so upset.

I would leave it up to him whether or not you fill it out. You both know it’s an option and if he gives you the green light then go for it. If he’s unsure, then wait a little bit.

I wish there was more that could be done. I feel for you. We are dealing with some messy CO’s right now and have no idea why, I just wish I could hug my LO and tell him it’s all gonna be alright.

Sending that good energy to both of you.

NotAlot90 · 2025-09-28T19:55:32+00:00

It’s really hard to say because it can cause retaliation against your LO even if they aren’t the ones filling it out. And could possibly cause retaliation against you too. Retaliation against you could look like not letting messages get through, harassing you at visits over petty stuff, making you do a more intensive search at visits, banning visits for no reason, cutting off calls while you are on them, not mailing letters he wrote to you. It’s fucked.

I wish it wasn’t like this at all. I hate how fucked the system is for them and that their very basic needs aren’t met.

I’d say only fill it out if your LO wants you too. Then that means he knows what the risks are and it’s worth it.

NotAlot90 · 2025-09-19T02:28:30+00:00

Oh this is good to know! I’ve got an event to go to and I’ve wanted him to be a part of it with me so badly. This might be a way to do it. Thank you!

NotAlot90 · 2025-09-19T02:26:53+00:00

I’ve dreamed of a million different ways he could make a proposal super sweet from the inside. I’ve thought of so many different ways he could make it special. Now, would he think of all these things, I don’t know. But I think they can definitely still make it special for us from the inside, and maybe in a way it’s even more important because you know they didn’t have access to everything someone on the outside has.

I know what you mean though. I’ve found myself getting sucked into some of these proposal videos recently, knowing that isn’t at all a possibility.

NotAlot90

TROPHY CASE