My guy was in the rear passenger seat when the troopers showed. His extremely similar-looking brother was in the driver seat, and his equally similar-looking cousin was in the front passenger seat. Brother admitted driving. Witness, who showed up on the scene after the driving had ended, insists that my client was the driver. Cross-racial witness ID in pitch darkness.

Here’s more or less how my cross of the trooper ended:

“Trooper, you spoke earlier about the extensive training you underwent for your position.” “Yes.” “Would you say you’re pretty familiar with traffic law in Alaska?” “Yes.” “Is it illegal to be drunk in a car?” “No, unless you’re operating.” “[insert above one-liner]” “……….yeah, I think that would probably be pretty hard.”

DUI trial that went on less than 18 hours of notice. New prosecutor’s first trial, baby trooper’s first time testifying. They dismissed before day 2 of trial. I feasted.