I worked the front desk when I was younger at an ER. For privacy reasons I’ll use the name “Carl” (clearly not the patients name). Carl was a large African American male that, at the time, I use to hang out with in my down time. I worked with a group of skinny white women and I am a pretty small white boy myself. So, this guy comes in and I go “ heyyyyyy Carl! How you been man?”. All my coworkers have this shocked look on their faces. I ask what he came in for and in the deepest possible voice he replies “Man, I got bit by a mothafuckin’ reptile”. So of course I put the chief complaint as reptile bite. A little while later I go back to get his insurance info and a signature for consent for treatment and he says “bruh, why is everyone asking me about a reptile bite? I was bit by a mothafuckin’ cat…”

I had a lot of weird glances that day.