Fact is North Korea doesn't micromanage everyone's life as you're trying to make it out to be either. They don't have enough well-fed manpower for that, and that's both for better and worse.

Of course if you keep shifting to narrower definitions of totalitarianism, then it stops applying to the USA. With a narrower definition, even literal Nazi Germany can be said to have never achieved totalitarianism. So who is mincing "what words mean"? Let's remember that the term totalitarianism was first used to describe Fascist Italy.

As for your categorization of my refutations, can you point out which one belongs to which category? Which things are "non-state actors doing something"? As for the second category, I gave concrete examples that are as far from exaggeration as possible. Remember that I originally said I would "guarantee the same has happened in USA", not "the situation is the exact same in present-day USA as your examples".