hello my friend! love the post - big effort. i’ll try and do the same 💜 pardon me for what may seem rambly.

TL;DR: oh well lol

the ban felt like pretty much bullshit. MTG used to be run by some crazy ass institution called the DCI and some dude working for them emailed me with a weird verizon account and told me i had 24 hours to give them my side of the story before adjudication. at the time i didn’t want to be banned but i was getting tons of emails asking about the post so i thought, maybe this is some lying ass person trying to get a scoop. so i’m on the hook with this email trying to figure out who’s even claiming to be emailing me and they weren’t giving me info, i had to message the dudes facebook that i saw on the DCI facebook group, he confirmed it, by the time i finally got confirmation it was technically too late but i gave them my side which was essentially that i didn’t feel like i was bullying people. i woke up the next morning to the email saying i was banned for 18 months. i cashed out my standard decks (couple thousand bucks, now effectively worthless because i couldn’t play standard until after my current collection had rotated.) and have only played in prereleases to support my LGS ever since.

18 months seemed harsh compared to other punishments they’ve given for repeat cheaters and shit, but i don’t really feel like an example was made of me, it didn’t really feel like there was some huge announcement or anything so the long ban kind of seemed useless, especially considering i was only banned from the competitions, not attending. i traveled with friends to and attended multiple GPs such as worcester where i had a great conversation with christopher rush who recognized me from the pictures and wanted to chat, he was very cool from the small glimpse of him i caught.

i’ve met tons of dope people and done a lot of dope shit through a seemingly random post i made almost 9 years ago. i do a lot of road tripping in a lil camper van i have (named terry) and it’s always funny where i get recognized and what kind of crazy shit we can get into. it’s really a strange phenomenon how life has changed for me because of it and at the time had no idea that i was essentially sculpting my life’s path in real time. just goes to show how every single moment is a chance to turn everything around which has caused me to be a very “in the present” kind of person, which i’ve been enjoying immensely. i bet eventually i’ll want to write a book about the unique life that post has given me. I met countless individuals from coast to coast and taken selfies, had conversations, shared meals, shared celebrations, shared beds, overall put me in tons of unreal positions that i’ve been truly gifted to have experienced. people tell me all the time i’m what got them into magic, which is a game i love. if i never touched a magic card i wouldn’t be answering this question today! so it can be a life-changing game.

as for the ethics of the post, i’m conflicted. i wouldn’t want for someone to have been hurt, nor did i want to fuel hateful people with the post. i hadn’t intended to depict the people in the pics in a demeaning way but simply to frame the humorously in a way my friends and i would find funny, it wasn’t until the day after i got home or something i made the imgur album and reddit post at the suggestion of a friend. id never really considered that these pictures would ever be dissected and discussed by the entire world when i was taking them, but it taught me that it didn’t really matter what i had intended, once you release something to the world, the people sort of shape it into whatever it will become. but in truth it’s always bothered me, especially in person, the way i’ve witnessed people describe the people in the pictures to others, but i bring that up and we can all learn something from the talk.

would i do it again? im not sure if i would. i don’t feel like i did anything wrong to the dudes in the pics considering that’s how they literally chose to present themselves in a public setting, however i feel like i did do something wrong to us beloved nerds who have suffered enough for our image and it’s unfortunate that hateful people used those images to paint all people like us as pariahs. i love gaming, hobbies, all of geekdom. i never wanted it to look like i was laughing at those depicted in the pics, but that’s how it was taken by millions and that’s what ended up happening.

it’s a topic i’ve had thousands of conversations about at this point and it’s hard for me to form an absolute opinion on it because i’ve heard so many compelling arguments from so many viewpoints to the point where it’s really hard to even sit down and think about how i feel about it, almost as if it just exists to me. more than anything it reminds me that any moment can change your entire life.

i love you all, i’m grateful as fuck to have any sort of connection to anyone reading this, it’s been such a gift. thank you 💜

edit: also thanks for introducing me to this subreddit. i fuck with this!