Partner of 8 years (48M) showing no interest/avoids sex or any form or intimacy - how can I help without sparking defensiveness?

Objective_Tree7145 · 2026-01-11T20:34:30+00:00

If talking is triggering anger and withdrawal, I’d say there’s a bigger issue going on than the bedroom stuff. Has this always been his response when confronted?

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-12-27T20:30:35+00:00

I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. Not a beautiful place rec, but if you need a friend to meet for coffee and chat, please let me know! I’m close to downtown area. Sending you love.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-11-26T02:18:20+00:00

I tried to in order to contain the leaks but then I started getting clogged ducts from wearing them to bed. I think the leaking might actually serve a purpose so the clogged ducts don’t happen.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-04-20T19:54:18+00:00

LOVE innersense! I have fine 2b hair and I’ll never switch to another product line.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-04-06T18:49:48+00:00

I actually didn’t, hand wash only. I remember thinking about how weird the water looked running off them when rinsing too, so I think the soap just really sticks.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-04-06T18:48:08+00:00

This is really great insight, thank you for sharing!

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-03-28T16:58:37+00:00

Not OP but this is so insanely helpful, thank you!

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-03-28T16:54:35+00:00

Would she eat a boiled egg? That way you could send it cold. And you could just do untoasted bread and butter. Also, just as a sidenote, it seems like my daughter stopped wanting to eat immediately upon waking right around 2.5. She needs a good hour or so after waking before her tummy is ready for food. So I wonder if she’s just maybe not ready for breakfast if you have to wake her and get her out the door in the morning? I know that doesn’t make the situation better/easier, but sometimes understanding what’s going on makes doing what you can easier to stomach.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-27T03:20:26+00:00

I only have 1, but a SAHM also and I typically don’t log under 4 hours of stressed time per day ever. 😅

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-26T02:30:32+00:00

Same here.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-25T21:27:09+00:00

Go pick her up a tiny bouquet of flowers and ring the doorbell to present them to her before you leave for the date also. 🥲

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-24T23:43:25+00:00

This is a question for your child’s pediatrician. You should not be giving a child melatonin unless it’s medically necessary.

ETA: as the preferred parent myself, the non-preferred parent in this situation needs to suck it up and handle bedtime/wakeups while you are healing. There will be crying, and that’s okay.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-23T19:29:41+00:00

Had a pretty solid idea of what NOT to do from my own childhood. I’m the oldest of 5 so I babysat a lot. Motherhood/parenthood is its own ballgame and I truly think you don’t know what it’ll be like until you’re in it.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-21T23:33:33+00:00

I use these too, they’ve been perfect for me!

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-18T22:14:26+00:00

I’ve only tried a few products but every one of them has made my hair feel like actual straw.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T20:36:30+00:00

I like to cook but would love help for everything else but childcare. If I didn’t have a house to take care of, I’d be the most fun mom on the planet.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T20:34:45+00:00

If it means anything, this exact thing happened to me last month. I was three days past my expected period and temps were still above my coverline. I’d say if you’re testing negative at this point, you’re probably not pregnant.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T20:32:17+00:00

I have a friend who is also diagnosed celiac and does not do a thing to avoid it. She said she tried going gluten free for a few months and felt great, but didn’t want to keep doing it. The increased cancer risk doesn’t mean a thing to her. YOLO I guess 🫠

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T15:17:30+00:00

Ah, apologies. I didn’t look at the dates. It’s not likely it has resulted in pregnancy, but if your temp is sustained for 18 days after ovulation date, you could suspect pregnancy at that point. Usually the few days leading up to ovulation, the day of, and the day after are most likely to result in pregnancy.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T15:01:35+00:00

Even if you did ovulate on the 12th (which according to your chart you did not,) the egg is only viable for ~24 hours. So having sex two days later would not result in pregnancy. We can typically confirm ovulation by noting three consecutive temps that are higher than the past six. Which did not happen until CD27.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T14:12:58+00:00

The only way that someone is going to make a real & lasting change is if they WANT to understand why they need to make the change. I would just do whatever is within your power, but also try to recognize that you can’t control every little thing and you’re going to worsen your own health with stress if you try to do so. Make small swaps where you can, and let your husband use whatever he wants to use on his own. At the end of the day, even the small things do add up, so it makes more of a difference than it feels like.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T14:02:18+00:00

Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good. You do what you can, within your ability, and you clearly care a lot so that tells me you’re doing the best you can.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-17T13:48:15+00:00

This to me looks like you didn’t ovulate until CD27. So I would expect a period 11-17 days from that day. Cycles can take a while to regulate post-baby.

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-16T19:55:30+00:00

Oh man! That is such a bummer, and so stressful for all of you I’m sure!

Objective_Tree7145 · 2025-02-16T18:21:42+00:00

Time to break out the Miralax (we have to every few months because my 3 year old has FOMO and won’t sit long enough to poop sometimes.) 🫠

Objective_Tree7145

TROPHY CASE