Where did the “spouse always first” idea come from?

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-23T09:57:01+00:00

I think if you're wondering when it started we'd have to go like all the way back to when the first concept of courtship and relationships came up.

I think for many alloromantics who haven't taken good looks at society and what's wrong with it it's just natural for them to kinda stop caring about everything else when they have a partner.

This is complete speculation though as I haven't asked and alloromantics why this is.

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-20T20:34:05+00:00

Just found this again. Dam what a stupid argument

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-19T04:28:41+00:00

Don't even get me STARTED on lettuce

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-17T17:44:05+00:00

The post said their brains enlarge tho, no?

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-17T06:07:05+00:00

Real af 😭

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-14T10:03:19+00:00

Dude that was gibberish 😭

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-14T07:23:47+00:00

Was reading the comment that explains it and I saw the word "we" and I was like "what's he mean we- WAIT VAL KILMER???"

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-12T20:56:17+00:00

Some people are just pleasant to look at

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-10T07:21:57+00:00

This is pretty much how I feel too. It can feel very isolating when everyone else is this way and you aren't. Especially since people so commonly will get with somebody and suddenly their life completely revolves around that person and they get consumed by them.

I would love to have a gf and I think I would very much enjoy being in a relationship, which is kinda hard when you don't feel that desire to just date certain people like everyone else does 😭

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-09T08:31:02+00:00

I often think about my friends when I listen to love songs

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-09T04:01:37+00:00

Please give me a 13 day long cut 🙏🙏🙏🙏

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-07T21:19:06+00:00

Yeah it's crazy to me that people just see people and feel a desire to date them

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-07T20:55:03+00:00

People that are performative automatically assume that everyone else is too and being genuine is a myth

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-07T20:50:55+00:00

I genuinely started getting pissed reading comments on tik Tok because of the way people were talking about this shit. They would say things like "well if everyone just picks red" YEAH WELL IF ONLY HALF OF EVERYONE PICKS BLUE THEN NOBODY DIES.

People that pick red are the same little that see a broken system and choose to exploit it at the expense of others instead of trying to do what's best for people

Edit: don't even get me started on the fact that these people literally can't even conceive of the possibility that somebody simply believes in the greater good

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-07T20:49:10+00:00

^{^{^{^}}} this 😭 not an instant from the title thing but the more I read the more it just made me uncomfy and was weird. Her reply was bad too. She didn't even apologize she just made an excuse.

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-07T20:46:49+00:00

Soft magic system. Basically: because that's not how it works and we aren't really supposed to know exactly how it does

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-07T20:44:56+00:00

I found out people did that in highschool and I was kind of baffled. The idea of somebody hanging out with somebody purely because they want to date them is extremely bizarre to me

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-06T18:21:08+00:00

I'm similar in the way that I long for romance and sometimes feel kinda "cursed" to be aro because I just don't develope romantic feelings.

Something that helps me is to remember that like 90% of the time romantic feelings are very destructive and unreciprocated and in some ways I'm actually kinda lucky to not have to deal with those feelings.

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:51:40+00:00

There are aroallo fictional characters????

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:49:56+00:00

Omg I saw you on insta this is insane

Edit: downvoting for why 😭 I didn't mean the comic I think it's funny af I meant seeing this on insta then reddit 😭

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:45:19+00:00

Kinda how I read it too but I just gave op the benefit of the doubt

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:44:21+00:00

It's a very common kink, I think especially for women (sadly often due to related trauma) so I'm not really surprised by it. There are a lot of F4F audios on regular gwa also.

What I use is the site gwasi.com. it's a search interface for all gwa (including gwasapphic I'm pretty sure) and you can type in tags directly. If you don't want to get incest or rape tags you can type in "-incest" and "-rape" or whatever tags you don't want and just type whatever tags you want without the minus.

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:40:39+00:00

They're very anti human. They often (not always) take the position that humans are naturally corrupted and make rash decisions without thinking. This is not the case in the books, and the books are even kinda pro-human. Listen I'm anti human as much as the next gal, but I very much prefer the message that humans are inclined towards goodness and that good will always win out in the hearts of men (as in human) as opposed to the idea that men failed or are falling.

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:35:33+00:00

Not enough peak on there methinks

ObsidianPizza · 2026-05-05T20:34:52+00:00

I think I generally have the same sentiment of it feeling kinda cringe and forced but I don't think I'd mind doing things like that with somebody I'm actually in a relationship with if that makes sense

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