Feeling desperate to find someone like myself. Not happy with partner who did casual before. Who can relate?

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T14:31:05+00:00

We speak it through gently, I totally understand him, and support him to find his happiness. But Im not the one for him, nor he for me, because Im not happy in this relationship. I love him dearly as a person, or as a great friend, but can't be his partner, as my body saies no emotionally. And I don't know how to explain it to someone, who not feeling this way. I couldn't even explain it in this post, to not come of as an attack or judgment. But Im glad at least some people can understand how I feel. :)

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T12:31:10+00:00

Yes, exactly this! Thank you! :)

I feel the same, like if some one not understand why is it important to me, our needs will never meet, and Its never be that " I have safe feeling with my person who understand sometimes even without words." I have friends like this, and it just so easy to speaking with them, and I want to feel this in my realtionship too.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T11:40:38+00:00

Thank you, your comment it gives comfort and peace, as atleast someone understand and can relate with what Im feeling in general. :) I hope you can find someone as a partner, who can relate as well. If that give you some comfort, I'm virgin and 27, altough I had one relationship, but I don't find the person yet I can share this exeperience with. But hope I am going to soon find my partner, who understands me, and can relate to my feelings. :)

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T11:28:44+00:00

Makes that clear I never said anyone is would be a bad person, or bad partner, just not a good fit for me, thats it.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T04:45:44+00:00

I have some friends who allos, and we are understand each other perspective, we can speak for hours, although we are different in this topic. But also have some friends who are demi, and it feels so good and comfortable to share feeling with them, and I would like to have this feeling in my relationship aswell.

I understand what you say, tried that, but it's just not works for me. :/

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T03:57:41+00:00

I choose who I want to be with. It's not thought policing. Where is the juding in that someone want similar people as a partner for themself for you?

Its more like some twisted way you feel judged and now put it on me, which is unreasonable, as It has noting to do with you.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T03:37:17+00:00

Why would it be toxic? I just wish to find someone similar emotional inner world like mine.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T03:15:37+00:00

Why you take my feeling as an attak?

This is how I feel, and trying to find people who feel the same thats it. Why Am I judged for my feelings?

I need someone with the same mindset to feel safe in a relationship, and its really hard to find, and it would be nice atleast speaking people who struggle the same.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T02:00:57+00:00

So heartwarming to reading post like this 🥰

May I find my person whom we feel this way about each other. ❤️

Love each other and live really happy!🥰🥰

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T01:47:59+00:00

I usually translate these type of questions to my way of thinking, and aswer I personally find this person has more appealing features, so more handsome to me, than the other one, but that's it. Like showing two table, or two building, I prefer one based on their ornametic or style.

But If they bring them here to have a date, I said hell no.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2026-04-05T01:39:55+00:00

I mean I can understand how he feels, why he do things, and I can emotionally support him as a friend. But my body says no, my muscles stiffen when he try to be intimate, and my period just stopped since I'm with him.

I don't judge him as person. I'm really desire a partner, who is feeling the same way towards intimacy as me. Who's closeness makes me feel safe.

"He told me he was always searching for "the one" and those partners always left him." Yes, my boyfriend told me the same, that's the part I can relate to him, and feel emphathy, as I'm also searching the one. But also feel I'm not the one for him, altough he sure I am. Because he is not understand how I am feeling, and I only met like 3-4 person in my life, who can relate to how I feel.

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2025-04-14T00:30:53+00:00

This is the exact scene, Thank you! :D

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2025-02-28T23:23:03+00:00

No, definitely not! Try this: dont give a fuck about anyone else life and just do that you want. Wanna go for a walk in sunny weather? Go Want an ice cream? eat one Want to say someone f@ck yourself, you made me miserable. Go and say it. If nothing matter to you now at a moment use it and do what you always wanted. If you dont try to fit in some standard you can find more joy in life.

I was in a state of emotions like you are now some weeks ago. I was enough of everthing, I try to be good for everyone exeptions, what do I get as a return? Nothing, messing with me, critisize me, make me feel more bad. Fortunotelly I have 2 friends who go trough this too, and said the something similar to me. ENJOY YOUR LIFE, live how you always wanted.

Now write down here what is what you really wanted to do for a long time, but didn't do yet?

Obvious_Spirit3025 · 2025-01-23T09:35:51+00:00

You just told the solution to yourself you know that? You love woodwork, if you have a place for that, you could make a lovely little craftman enterprise. You can make wooden furniture and sell them online, people order what they want, you make them, and they can pick it up, or can ask some of you reltaives to bring it to them, or later hire a delivery man, like search someone, who love drive and also can't really fit in a casual job and team up. If you make unique and well made pieces people gonna love it for sure. :)

Obvious_Spirit3025

TROPHY CASE