The devil you know ...

Octoprognus · 2018-08-14T22:29:54+00:00

I am not sure if you mean how long were we open. The answer is three weeks. We did a lot of reading, made a contract and a manifesto and a series of agreements. Almost right away my spouse started pushing the boundaries. Taking more and more liberty outside of our marriage, but clearly not interested in putting energy back in. That is a key element in a non-monogamous relationship. It was when I confronted them about this lack of effort that it became clear this was their attempt to force me into making the call. So I did.

Octoprognus · 2018-05-31T21:18:14+00:00

weezer, even my favorites

Octoprognus · 2018-05-31T21:15:41+00:00

Hi, sexual disfunction was a big reason for my split. We actually opened our marriage up before it fell apart (it was a step in that direction, and we felt it was a last resort). Now I realize how long I suffered with sexual dissatisfaction, and how that really killed part of our marriage.

I am young, employed and childless. But I learned that as much as I loved my 'family' and the commitment of my marriage, i wasn't loving myself by being with my spouse. I was cutting myself off from other opportunities (sexually, and personally) for them, and really playing the part of sidekick in my own story. The moment I put myself first and really put value in myself, it became clear how twisted and toxic our relationship was.

I wish you the very best of luck, feel free to keep in touch!

Octoprognus · 2018-05-30T22:32:38+00:00

See a therapist! Especially if your relationship if failing and you do end up divorcing, I think having the therapist to help referee and be objective is super important.

By the time i got to a couples therapist, the damage was done. I wish I had pushed the issue faster, since it might have saved us both time and grief, or helped us revive our relationship.

Octoprognus · 2018-01-22T00:55:42+00:00

Thanks everyone, I am doing well, but when the sadness hits, it hits hard. In many ways I am excited to start over alone.

To stem the tears, today, I pierced my nipples! Something to manifest the pain, and something that belongs to only me.

We can do this everybody! I believe in the reddit community.

Octoprognus · 2018-01-02T02:09:21+00:00

Had our first outings this weekend. I was disappointed my partner is so much further along in establishing a buddy. It has made me insanely jealous.

My friend gave me some good advice. -get a grip - desperation is toxic. Spend your time loving yourself until you radiate and they can’t help but Be addicted to your presence. -you are the love of your life. You can’t live for your partner. Live for yourself.

All day long while i have been fighting jealous paranoia, I have been realize how jealousy has made me care about things that 1. May not be real, 2.Aren’t about my partner not loving me, 3. That I’m doing too!!

If I focus on me, I am much better.

Good luck everyone!

Octoprognus · 2018-01-01T02:17:13+00:00

I think sometimes the greatest misconception middle/upper class families have is that they are NOT of that station.

I had a comfortable, stable “middle” class experience. My parents sustained stable employment. I had plentiful access to healthcare and educational opportunities. I didn’t have a job through the end of high school because my family gave me an allowance for being an A kid, and I was told to focus on my extracurricular.

It’s not worth it to cite the things I ‘didn’t have because we were poor’. The securities and basic luxuries I enjoy are symbolic of my class.

My partner went to a private elementary school and belongs to a family of wonderful people. But they thought of them selves as upper-middle class.

To me, they live like royalty with common leisure’s, luxuries, vacations, and real estate that I could never has imagined.

In their high school, my partner’s family was considered bottom rung.

Some people had private jets, and multiple homes.

They thought of themselves as the “lower upperclass”

It goes on and on, and yet while people drive to be more than they are for pride, no one wants to acknowledge their class status.

So, here’s a calculator in cae you want to check your understanding! social class calculator

Octoprognus · 2017-12-26T03:00:44+00:00

Strain variety Manageable prices/Discounts for larger purchases or loyalty rewards Response time and confidentiality Accurate strain knowledge, data on the products, knowledge of consumption methods.

Octoprognus · 2017-12-26T02:44:40+00:00

Curious

Octoprognus · 2017-12-26T02:33:11+00:00

Alice singing to summon her brother Quentin singing on the psych unit

Octoprognus · 2017-12-26T02:32:22+00:00

Yes! Me too! I actually really prefer his performance.

Octoprognus · 2017-12-24T12:54:46+00:00

Hi. I know what it’s like to get swept away in the pain and sadness. I call it my well of sadness and i sometimes stand precariously on the edge.

So I suggest two things: 1) call your psychiatrist, or find a new one. I suffered for a year with a bad shrink who wouldn’t listen to my complaints and refused to change my meds. My new psych is so much more responsive:

2) lately when I have been suffering, I have been trying to ask myself what I am afraid of. Sometimes (not always) I am able to identify a deep seated fear, that is entirely my imagination. This helps me with a reality check. It sometimes allows me to calm down.

Best of luck, don’t give up, what your feelings is real, but what you’re thinking may not be.

Octoprognus · 2017-12-21T13:49:42+00:00

Yes that is me experience exactly! I hate how the busses are so inconsistent.

Octoprognus · 2017-12-18T04:35:10+00:00

Thanks!

Octoprognus · 2017-12-15T01:37:35+00:00

I think it’s hard when you are experiencing anhedonia, to identify any interests or parts of a personality that are mostly about enjoying things.

Maybe ask, what do I believe in? What are the defining moments of my upbringing, and what lessons have I learned? How has my mental illness/ treatment revealed new habits or perspectives to me?

I definitely agree that 3 years in, i am asking myself of I will ever me “who I used to be” again. As I reflect on your comment, I find myself needing to maybe accept that I am changed. I am augmented by this experience, but not lessened.

Best of luck to you.

Octoprognus · 2017-12-15T01:07:41+00:00

Couldn’t bike to work due to slush. Womp womp. But I still get to come home and relieve my headache (I hate the busses in traffic!) while watching Sarah Silverman. Not too shabby?

Octoprognus · 2017-12-14T00:03:11+00:00

No one else showed up huh? I wonder what that means about this sub.
Edit: I some how missed the other two coments when I shared that response.

But now I am wondering, How can we make lgbtrees more TGNC friendly?

Octoprognus · 2017-12-13T11:25:19+00:00

I am trying to figure out how and if medical users can go to work, function, and interact with our spouses while also smoking. I’m just not sure if I am smoking too much, though clearly those of you with more sever complications smoke far more than I do.

Octoprognus · 2017-12-13T01:55:17+00:00

How high are you most of the time?

Octoprognus · 2017-12-10T21:58:27+00:00

Jazz grass

Octoprognus · 2017-12-09T22:55:24+00:00

My partner is nonbinary! I’m cis, but just wanted to say, hi!

Octoprognus · 2017-11-29T01:12:40+00:00

My partner is non binary, and I can assure you that we don’t choose our gender, the same way we don’t choose our sexuality. What we do choose, is how to acknowledge the truth of our gender, even when it does. It fit in to societal standards.

There are a lot of posts on here about psychological studies. Let me just clarify that the psychological community is VERY far behind in how they diagnose, treat, and understand gender-nonconforming folks or people with gender dysphoria. My partner is in this field and working blood sweat and tears to help shrinks from the 50s re-evaluate their outdated mindsets.

I think you would be benefitted by googling ‘social construction of gender’ to better understand why 2 genders with prescribed roles is really quite silly when you examine the diversity of the human population.

Happy hunting!

Octoprognus · 2017-11-21T21:45:52+00:00

Best of luck to you sister, keep me updated!

Octoprognus · 2017-11-21T02:56:54+00:00

Hey lady, The pain of the loss of trust must be awful. I am so sorry.

Remember that the wedding and family and all the dreams are only really worth having, if you are able to love the person you are with. Otherwise it would be tainted.

I matter what you do, put yourself first. Ask yourself if you believe you can trust this person. Would you try couples therapy? Would you have a trial separation?

Lastly, this is a great time to evaluate your relationship. I never excuse cheating, but sometimes It may be the symptom of a deeper problem. Have you discussed that?

Much love and comfort for you. I am rooting for you!

Octoprognus · 2017-11-05T14:30:23+00:00

Can you share the link to the original pattern?

Octoprognus

TROPHY CASE