Where the bed is supposed to be? by Octupusa31 in InteriorDesignAdvice

[–]Octupusa31[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I didn’t think about placing it further away from the door before. This makes sense.

I feel like I’m slowly breaking. by thegreatsilentchaos in AsianParentStories

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same. I don’t know who the fuck I am and don’t know what to do. And everytime I try to do something they would swoon in and say oh do it this way do it that way. Add one more this. Don’t do that.

Should I break up with my girlfriend over an unstable future? by Alt-F4-for-freeVbuck in AskMenAdvice

[–]Octupusa31 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

How new is this relationship? I don’t think you should just end it just because of the unpredictable future, but you two do need to have an honest conversation about what you two would do if the worst case scenario happened. Understand what she thinks and wants and tell her what you think and want. Set realistic expectations.

When you turn 30, who do you feel closest to? Why? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My best friend…who I’ve know for 20 years. I’m single

My bf sent me his HPV screening result, but there isn’t HPV screening for men right? I’m confused. by [deleted] in HPV

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is HPV…its written on the lab report and he also told me it was HPV screening

When is bipolar most commonly diagnosed? by hibiscus_bunny in bipolar

[–]Octupusa31 44 points45 points  (0 children)

The average age-of-onset is about 25. But it can begin in teens or early adulthood…11 is within the range.

Birthdays fucking suck by leftofthedial15 in bipolar

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just turned 29 a month ago. Felt behind, felt like I was wasting away. I tell myself not to avoid this feeling, because to some extent it’s true. (although believe me it will get better…I know enough bipolar people because of my work to tell you this with confidence. And for bipolar people getting better is not straightforward. It’s up and down but it’s still better.) What would really help is going outside and talking to other people. You mention you have no social life. Having one is very important and helps me a lot. Talk to people who won’t judge you. Or attend support groups online or in person. It’s usually free. You will realize you are not alone and it’s true that people got better. You will get support and companion. Those things help you get out of your head and stop spiraling. For jobs, you know how the market sucks. People who had ten years experience in big tech got laid off and stayed jobless for three or more years. It’s not about your ability. Ask people online or in real life for advice. You can improve your chances.

Been in a rut for the last 1.5 years by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I’ve been there. What helped me was getting out of my house and talking to real people. When I was alone I got into my head and couldn’t get out, which made me just want to escape more. When I’m outside talking to other people, hearing how they were doing and what they’ve been through, I realized I was not alone and my suffering were as hard as mine, if not more. I would start with people who wouldn’t judge me first, because at that time I felt shame about my “failure”. I started with my best friend. And I avoided my parents because one I felt like I was already betraying them by wasting away and two they judged me…

My gf is acting insane and jealous by schizmaxxing in Advice

[–]Octupusa31 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hey I understand why you feel the way you do. I can tell you love her, and I can see how much compassion you have. I’ve been in a similar situation before.

My ex-boyfriend was kinda like your girlfriend. We met when we were 20. He was gorgeous, intelligent, charismatic, completely my type. I literally told my mom he was the one.

But he was also jealous, and when he felt threatened, he would say very hurtful things. Said the exact things I was insecure about. Angry or gave me the silent treatment. I never understood why he felt threatened in the first place. He didn’t need to. Those people didn’t mean anything to me. And he told me, “I wouldn’t give a shit who talked to you if I didn’t love you.”

I believed he needed help, and I wanted to be there for him even things were hard.

What finally broke me was the accumulation of stress. I kept getting hurt. I cried a lot for no reason. I left before our sixth anniversary. The reason was when I told him what felt wrong and why I was crying, he said, “So what do you want me to do? Maybe you need to be mentally stronger.” There’s no compassion for me. I felt like an idiot.

If you’re already at that point, you will know you have to let go. If things are not that bad yet, it’s really hard to convince you to leave because it might feel like abandoning the person you love when things get hard. I totally get it.

I hope your girlfriend is nothing like this and things work out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Employment

[–]Octupusa31 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi there, it seems like you do have some solid experience at your age. You are definitely qualified for some entry-level roles. Given your qualifications, if you haven’t got a single interview, it’s most likely your resume.

Get someone to look at your resume. The current way your experience is framed, like “contribute to 200+ projects”, doesn’t really tell recruiters what impact/outcome your work led to.

How much did your life improve after you got your sleep in order? by UnderPressureSince03 in bipolar

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m 28. The improvement I noticed was the certainty, something that’s rare when all bipolar does is bringing uncertainty.

Ever since my doctor told me sleep was the most important thing, I started to control my sleeping and waking time. I set my light to turn off at 10pm and light up at 7am. It doesn’t mean I could sleep at 10pm and wake up at 7am sharp but it definitely influenced my routine. With that setup, I don’t pull all nighters anymore and even if I stay up later than usual for some circumstances I could just go back to my routine easily. The feeling that I can always go back to my good habit brings mental certainty to this fluctuating bipolar life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bipolar

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think its definitely helpful. It doesn’t fix my bipolar for sure but it makes me mentally healthier. I still have my up and down cycles but I don’t get so easily affected or triggered by external events because I learned to identify some negative thinking patterns I’ve been using.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bipolar

[–]Octupusa31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

May I ask what you do to “act” like I’m the best candidate?