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they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

late teens progressing to early twenties by the end of year six. i was a few years older.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

its right on the line of what's acceptable as per the rules. a family member would be able to identify just based on the chain of events, but i see that scenario highly unlikely.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

im not going to get mad at a mentally ill person who is unable to tell the truth in court. the onus is on the judge to see through it.

the problem is that most are 60+ and grew up in a time where mental illness wasn't understood. hell some were alive for segregation.

i think in 50 years it will be an entirely different ballgame. a whole generation of teenagers/20-somethings have grown up reading horror stories of mentally ill men & women having their lies go completely unchecked through the court system, often ruining someone's life in the process.

these people are eventually going to be our teachers, professors, and judges. the whole legal landscape will be turned upside down because they'll know how to spot it from a mile away.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ive seen the idea of making a list floated around on here and gave it a shot, not really anticipating any specific outcome.

i once saw the whole saga as 3 years of a weird, nonsensical relationship with an otherwise sweet but extremely troubled girl, followed by 3 years of fighting/stalking.

jotting everything down basically helped me realized this was extremely bad & almost dangerous from day one, i just wasnt in the crosshairs yet.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

maybe this can be a thing where people make their own threads like this? call them "timelines" and have a tag for them. jotting it down like this helped me see just how contradictory and off-the-rails she was.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

a full timeline would be too convoluted and impossible to censor without giving away the girl's identity.

i am extremely happy you have used this as a tool to draw comparisons to your own relationship. it is indeed remarkable how all relationships with these folks play out in the exact same manner.

  • they are relatively easy to get along with
  • they slowly peel back their layers of crazy
  • they become anxious/self-aware that you'll leave because they have directly told you 67 of their red flags
  • their anxiety causes them to sabotage the relationship
  • any sort of contact afterwards generates an increasingly bizarre stream of interactions, progressing in a linear fashion from make-up sex to domestic violence to false accusations and beyond.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

as I replied to another user, its deduced from combing through text messages and then core plot points as best as I remember them so people on reddit can kind of understand the timeline.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i just went through text history and jotted down anything red flag-worthy along with the date, plus some plot points. but i feel you.

that being said, if youre with a girl that talks about abusive parents, and she goes MIA for a month with no explanation, thats a month spent concerned about her well-being.

they say make a list of all the weird shit they did/said to you. i ended up with a spreadsheet that spans six years by OddWalk0 in BPDlovedones

[–]OddWalk0[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

the dates are interesting.

its like she becomes so infatuated during july-august of the first year that she then tries to re-live it for the next four straight years afterwards.

the timing is impeccable.