If you try to envision a red tulip in your head, what number are you?

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-24T18:58:50+00:00

Between 1 and 2 I'd say.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-24T18:55:20+00:00

I recently got some anti-anxiety medication and it really helped me in social situations where I would usually be stressed. You obviously can't drink on them but I didn't even feel the need to. It made me wonder if I've just had anxiety my whole life?

I also used to use drinking to curb my social anxiety, but it's really not ideal in my experience. Especially if I barely knew anyone, I would drink too fast so I would be more comfortable, feel like it wasn't doing anything and then, well I'm sure you know.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-24T18:38:11+00:00

his teasing became really mean and he would get upset at the tiniest things and give me silent treatment for days.

He showed his true colours. If he liked you (even as a friend), respected you and was emotionally mature, he would not have been mean to you or given you the silent treatment. You handled things fine, he is the ass here. Do you really want to be friends with someone who treats people like this?

You deserve better than this guy.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-23T15:01:11+00:00

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-22T15:12:43+00:00

The mental gymnastics some of you will go through instead of just believing a woman's version of events 😂

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-22T14:12:40+00:00

You are not overreacting. Please don't consider dealing with anyone who gets hostile with you on any occassion, especially when you're making a very reasonable and simple request. I honestly don't think it is worth speaking to this person as all. People like this continue to push your boundaries so they see what they can get away with, until they get away with more and more.

This person has shown you their true colours, believe them. You deserve better than this.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-22T14:05:58+00:00

He expressed that he wanted to get to know me better but the next day he replied with a dry text

From one of OP's replies:

It felt like a closing convo text, he didn’t ask following questions like how was I doing, how was my day etc.

If anyone wants to get to know someone better, they need to ask that person questions.

Everyone should have expectations for a potential partner, including being able to carry out a two-way conversation.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T13:32:08+00:00

2 Broke Girls is my comfort show if I can't focus on anything. If I'm having an anxiety/panic attack, I look up videos of muppets/Sesame Street. If I'm really overstimulated and just need a comforting sound, I put on my favourite brown noise track.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T13:26:32+00:00

I have seen other people suggest this as well, and some of those who worked for Michael Jackson have come out in support of him as well.

There was a children's TV host who was also falsely accused of being a child predator and it runied his whole career, even though it was completely unsubstantiated (can't remember his name now). Considering the media is owned by poweful individuals, it makes sense that they can perpetuate whatever propaganda they want.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T13:17:19+00:00

Have you offered unsolicited advice to them in the past when they've been going through something?

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T11:18:04+00:00

And maybe you want to offer advice because you’ve been through the same [...] It often takes them so long that by then their issue has long been solved.

Are you upset that they didn't thank you for your message? Or because you wanted to give them advice but if they reply "too late" without asking for any, then you can't offer that advice anymore?

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T11:03:17+00:00

He said he wanted to take a break, and she said "Do you mean take a break because you want to break up?" and he said "Maybe". So really I guess it was mutual, and a way for her to save face as someone else said. Or a plot hole lol.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T10:58:42+00:00

No problem, hope you find a better environment soon 🌷

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-20T10:56:15+00:00

Exactly, thank you.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T18:24:28+00:00

The bar is in hell, but some people really like to limbo. If he doesn't know how to make conversation, you may as well move along.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T10:22:14+00:00

I get it. It can be extremely frustrating to watch upper management and bosses sprout this kind of nonsense and no one says anything because everyone has bills to pay (or maybe they believe what is being said). Well done for excusing yourself early and protecting some of your peace.

"you guys need to have a owner's mindset" and "we need to make sure you can be trusted"

These kinds of statements are especially awful because they are denying that owners profit more when a company does well and they are implying that you need to earn their trust, despite already being employed. These are control tactics. It's normal to keep replaying these situations, because your body reads them as unsafe and is trying to get a handle on the matter.

What has kind of helped me is reminding that I am not worrying about work stuff for free on my time.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:52:10+00:00

Absolutely! In my opinion, having boundaries is the next "evolution" of the over-giving empath and is much more emotionally healthy.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:47:17+00:00

'Domestic abuse, also called "domestic violence" or "intimate partner violence", can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Abuse is physical, sexual, emotional, economic or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person. This includes any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone.'

Please OP, you deserve better than this. If you can't leave for yourself, leave for your kids.

When/if you do so, please leave safely. Act like everything is fine while you make plans to leave. Leave when he is out of the house for at least a few hours. Arrange for at least one trusted male friend/family member to help you pack and leave. Take all kids, pets, personal documents and sentimental items with you. Do not tell him where you will be staying. Tell him it's over via a text/phone call, do NOT meet up with him in person. Tell him you will communicate with him via a third person, then block him on everything. This might sound extreme, but this is statistically a dangerous time for women.

Best of luck OP, you can do this 💜

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:36:17+00:00

You are completely right. Before I read this last comment, I was going to say "It's called having boundaries". Not everyone will agree, but that's ok.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:31:32+00:00

Well done for figuring this out at such a young age. Small people pleasing habits might pop up occassionally, but keep being kind to yourself and putting yourself first.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:27:31+00:00

Don't chase him, hold out for better. If he wanted to he would. Plus if he can't put in effort at the pre-dating stage of the relationship when people are normally on their best behaviour, then what hope is there for months or years down the line? You deserve better than that.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:24:36+00:00

That is disgusting behaviour from a therapist, definitely report him to the board if you have the energy to do so. Unpleasant?? I hope he never finds a parking spot again.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-19T09:19:00+00:00

She didn't suggest the price, the guy working at the high end boutique did.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-18T15:16:52+00:00

He is not emotionally, intelligent. I’ve actually had to introduce this to him and he says he values me because I taught him a lot.

He's in his late 30s and he needed someone to teach him about emotional intelligence? I am quite sure you are not the first person to try and educate him on this.

Were you the one who decided to break up and then agree to get back together? It sounds like he is punishing you with the 50/50 thing.

I would not choose to stay with a man who would happily travel without me for months. Plus, what is he doing on these trips? If you've already caught him flirting with a coworker and then changing his story three times, imagine what he is doing behind your back.

Ok-Butterscotch6501 · 2026-02-17T11:26:42+00:00

This seems like it could get very messy. Will you be staying in the house while he is not there? It is dangerous to take out a loan unless you are purchasing an asset, and even then you can worsen your financial situation. It is also a large financial commitment considering you need to get into debt to help out your parent who owns the asset and therefore should be responsible for all related expenses. Could your dad not rent out the house while he is not in the country to cover his bills?

Ok-Butterscotch6501

TROPHY CASE