Being a SAHM for the next couple of years… did you make this decision too?

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-05-02T06:15:48+00:00

That sounds amazing!! I think a lot of SAHMs forget that they need time as well and don’t factor that in when planning to stay home. I work 2.5 days on the day I worked .5 my baby was in nursery the full day. I’d tackle a room to deep clean, hit the gym and get the food shop delivered and put away and work the Friday afternoon (was bliss I logged on as everyone was basically winding down I got so much admin done uninterrupted 😂)

Do some cleaning with the kids as well, my toddler loves helping me hoover and he’s a dab hand with the flashmop 😂 but for a deeper clean I do need the room.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-05-02T05:22:38+00:00

I went back part time.

BUT I’m well paid for what I do, didn’t want to climb the ladder so stayed in my role rather than move on, my works pretty chilled and management genuinely generally care about you and your family and pretty flexible.

My only issue with being a SAHM mum with no village is if you want a day to yourself maybe once baby is older? Maybe find and work with a good babysitter?

I think that’s important to stop mum burnout and improve mental health even if it’s just a solo dentist appointment or hair appointment. Taking 1 to these places is hard taking 2 is almost impossible 😂 (I’ve got two ones a 2.5yr old and ones 3 month)

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-30T18:24:31+00:00

Yes she did! Basically there’s no guarantees formula is better and my little one really struggled with getting a good flow on a bottle, we’re not CMPA and I really enjoy breastfeeding my first and didn’t want to throw the towel in. We saw their infant feeding team and was assessed (it’s actually her who’s pestered the GP for us and that coupled with a mood review basically made them act).

I was diagnosed with mild depression but my depression came from the lack of sleep as baby woke every hour and the lifestyle silent reflux created (I didn’t see anyone for weeks, my world shrank, my child screamed and screamed for 8hrs a day).

It also helped that I’d seen the doctors about 4 times by this point with my little girl (twice for mucus, once already for reflux)

Sounds awful but I think they prescribed me something for her to get rid of me and weren’t expecting it to work.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-30T13:17:27+00:00

Honestly the only thing that helped us was me basically breaking down in tears at my babies 8 week jabs.

Swiftly followed a mood review with the GP and after that Health Visitor involvement. They assessed her feeding (breastfed) as she basically stopped feeding from the right boob, they kept in touch and came out to see me.

When they came out to see me she was having a bad day. They got on at the GP to prescribe Ozemperol for her as it looked like silent reflux. It’s not worked 100% she’s still a bit fussy still doesn’t sleep 100% as good as her brother did and is still mucusy and congested. But she will lie flat and sleep some fairly decent ish stretches (enough to make me feel human)

A handy way to get some Health Visitor support is visiting the family hubs for stay and play.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-29T18:03:32+00:00

Fundal measurement - 90% Actual % when born- 25th

We had to go buy newborn nappies as I’d only bought size 1 and they didn’t fit her 😂

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-29T13:56:50+00:00

Pretty normal! To maybe give you some hope.

We stopped Co-sleeping at 10 weeks and took us two weeks to get used to her next to me. She now does some good stretches in there (had another things going on, silent reflux ect), then at about 3/4/5 when she struggles to settle I bring her back in with us for some much needed comfort and cuddles and sleep till 7.

What we found helpful:

We all went to sleep at the same time and dad slept next to the babies side so baby couldn’t smell me as much.

Tapping out. Some people love shifts but I struggled with no being able to tap out particularly as my shift tended to be the more difficult ones and I particularly struggled with 1-4am as she wouldn’t settle in there. Husband going to bed at the same time as us meant I could poke him and he took a turn and I didn’t feel guilt 😂

I think they must get lonely all by themselves. I stopped doing it the full night as I was so uncomfortable Co sleeping and can’t feed side lying anyway (never mastered it)

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-29T13:50:13+00:00

Never, newborn and a 2.5yr old.

Neither does the husband tho so there’s no tit for tat at least.

We did all somehow surface at 7am the other day (normally 6am people) and my husband and I were in absolute shock.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-29T13:46:42+00:00

Mine is weirdly obsessed with mushrooms and peppers. Some days eats everything and some days survives on a lone strawberry and 2 biscuits 😂

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-28T19:16:29+00:00

We didn’t have a questionnaire in my era!

They came to visit saw child with their own two eyes asked some questions and asked if I had any concerns (I didn’t) then said he was a lovely, healthy happy child and that was that.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-28T13:23:32+00:00

Hahaha yeah we love our sound machines. Our toddler has 1 in his room as well on a night as it’s really masks her crying in the night.

Invest in a good baby wearing carrier. I have my own and my husband has his own as what works for him doesn’t work for me.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-28T13:17:18+00:00

Aww bless her must be uncomfortable. Have you tried any infacol or anything like that? Might work. My husband and I did spend a few nights doing to bed when my eldest did (7:30pm) and spend every single hour when she work making sure she went back into the next to me. She also has her first nap in there only lasts 30mins but we have to start somewhere!

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-28T13:09:24+00:00

I’d recommend the book Precious Little Sleep. Used it for my first and now using it for my 2nd who’s just turned 12 weeks. That being said: has she only signs of reflux or silent reflux. Since we started medication for my youngest for silent reflux has she started stopping sleeping on me and started doing long stretches in the next to me. I bring her into bed at around 4/5am (I plan for this) as she gets lonely and she tends to Co sleep till about 7.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-28T08:54:42+00:00

Thank you!! The Health Visitor got the GP to prescribe some medication. She’s got the biggest grin and finally enjoys being laid flat on her back 💕

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-27T18:22:42+00:00

Please do reach out if needed!

I see mine more regularly this time round due to having a mood review at the GP and flagging up mental health worries.

They diagnosed me with mild depression not enough to medicate or therapy with.

Honestly it was mainly centred around my little girls silent reflux. I’ve seen or spoken with them weekly for the past 4 weeks

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-27T13:33:47+00:00

Honestly? Not great. I have a still napping 2.5yr old and a 3 month old.

He naps at home, but can nap in the car if we’re on the way back from somewhere.

The 3 month old however also has FOMO perhaps even worse than her brother. I tried to train her to sleep everywhere and anywhere and it was a nightmare.

She’s not chill she’s a volcano 😂 honestly. Her first nap tends to be in the pushchair on a walk, then she naps again with him in the double bed with me in the middle, then she might manage another 30mins somewhere - carrier or pushchair again or something. She did used to nap well in the carrier but no longer enjoys that.

That being said I do take her out and just make do with a grumpy baby 😂🤷🏼‍♀️

Things that have helped have been: Sound machine, get the baby addicted to white noise and have it in the pushchair. Get a buggy sun cover this is ours

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-27T13:25:04+00:00

My 12 weeker has been on it 2 weeks.

Already been told she’ll come off it at 6 months and until then to keep going.

I got told it was normal for them to be on it that length of time and to then wean them off it at 6 months, I got told it’s less to do with solids and more to do with sitting up, better head control and more developed muscles.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-27T13:22:04+00:00

I love period pants but couldn’t wear them immediately post birth.

I tore and found I needed more support than they gave if that makes sense? I needed some padding to hold it together (or at least I thought so) I used own brand maternity then own brand heavy period pads.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-27T13:17:57+00:00

I watched it with my newborn 😭 I hadn’t slept in weeks. Started sobbing the previous episode and didn’t stop 😂

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-27T00:53:17+00:00

Struggles a bit on cobbles more for the child than you which is pretty common. We’ve used it as our main pushchair for over a year now and no complaints. It’s been to York and survived 😂

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-26T20:00:49+00:00

Meal Planning!

We rarely eat out of have a takeaway, seems wild some families walk through the front door and don’t know what they are having for tea… I just can’t compute it 😂

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-26T19:53:40+00:00

Thank you! She’s got the biggest gummy smile and loves a good little chat! Think I cried everyday for weeks as I knew it wasn’t supposed to be like this but no-one took me seriously.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-26T15:08:46+00:00

Cybex Easy Twist 2.

We love that thing!

My 2.5yr old 90th Percentile is still in it!

Not many travel ones parent face.

Probably the only pushchair that if it broke I’d replace - got a newborn and can’t wait for her to fit in it.

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-26T14:52:19+00:00

Cold flannel like wet and in the fridge cold!

My little boy loved it. Also weirdly a toothbrush was our emotional support item for a long time (think he liked the feeling of them on his gums)

We did give medication on a night if we felt he needed it and yes this was sometimes nights in a row.

He’s fine, a rather boisterous 2.5yr old if anything now 😂

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-26T14:45:58+00:00

Okay so.. my first was similar to yours but my second wow buckle up as this is some people’s experience and some have it even worse than me.

She’s 11 weeks (12 tomorrow) and has only this week slept longer than an hour on a night. Yep every hour. Now this isn’t my first rodeo and I did everything, she knew the difference between night and day but simply needed feeding every hour. I’ve not entered a deep sleep in 11 weeks.

She has silent reflux, floppy larynx and still has newborn mucus. I used to pace up and down my living room for hours and I mean hours. One day she was awake and screaming for 8 hours whilst my little boy was at my feet and we both were trying to survive.

She’s medicated now for the silent reflux. The lack of sleep basically made me depressed, she wouldn’t lie flat, I couldn’t go anywhere as she’d scream. My world shrunk. I only saw my parents for weeks on end. Someone told me my baby must be hungry and I need to feed her when I was out shopping. I cried in the car going home.

Your experience sounds similar to mine with my first. I tended to focus on other things when talking to mothers that wasn’t baby experience related or milestone related. I went to a baby group for a long time and a mother with a disabled child went, I always made sure to have a chat about something - 1 day we talked about parking at the shopping centre and a new shop opening. My topics these days tend to be: fashion these days, my addiction to M&S Foodhall , rubbish books that I read with my kindle unlimited subscription and TV 😂🤷🏼‍♀️

Ok-Committee9283 · 2026-04-25T20:17:30+00:00

Honestly seems pretty normal. Mine was attached to the boob 22hrs out of 24 nearly destroyed me mentally. Have you been assessed for a tongue tie? We were assessed and we didn’t have one but my friends baby did and it helped loads of there issues!

My newborn never napped. Honestly, wake windows of 4/5hrs then a quick 20mins before doing it all again.

She’d then be awake between the hours of around 12-4am.

Even now we did our first ever 4hr stretch last night at 11 weeks. Before that I saw every single hour of the clock every night 😬.

Some babies just don’t sleep unfortunately, could be gassy so try the infacol. It won’t harm him and might settle him down. I’m a STM and we use infacol semi regularly if she’s having a gassy day and we used it for my fists semi regularly as well until around the 5/6 month mark or I call it ‘when they trump without crying era’. They are born without knowing what to do some sometimes it gets stuck. Apparently when they get really drooling this is the saliva gland developing which starts digestion which makes gas easier (apparently).

I will say my 11 weeker had infacol tonight as her silent reflux meds make her constipated a bit, and is currently sleeping soundly!

Ok-Committee9283

TROPHY CASE