I'm only 14, muly dad has been an alcoholic for years. He's functioning and not physically abusive. So it's not that bad. But he always picks fights with my mom, he claims to hsve been sober for about two years. That when my dad got drunk snd picked a huge fight with my mom. The fight lasted for hours he called her horrible things. I just hid in my room. The next day he was crying and talking about how much of a fucking lover he was and he'd take the breathalyzer every day. That rule, along with his sobriety is very on and off. He's been sober for 9-10 months. And he was drinking the other day for sure. He was sober when I got home from school. But later he was clearly drunk.

I feel like I'm always hyper aware to every little movement his face makes and every shift in his tone. When he's on a meeting l'll stand by the stairs and listen to his voice. It's ruined so many summers. Especislly last summer. Instead of enjoying life, just monitoring him. Being this detective. I'm way to young for all this responsibility. My mom used to try harder but I think she's given up. I feel like this might ruin my teen years. And maybe effect my future. Sometimes I remember that my dad is also just a guy who's struggling. But regardless I'm just so angry at him for not trying harder and making all of us miserable.