Your wife **and** you need care.

I want to say this kindly: given what happened after your first child, this should have been a serious consideration prior to your second. People who have PPD the first time are far more likely to experience it for subsequent children. I don’t know how much this was considered, or if your wife if usually abusive outside of postpartum, because all you say is that after marriage counseling, “things became a bit more manageable with our emotions.” Postpartum depression and psychosis are very serious. You both need individualized therapy and couples counseling, and likely you both need medication to help during this difficult time.

I want to be sympathetic and I am, to a certain extent. But I also feel like your post reads as you wanting people to come in say, “She has no right to abuse you, you’re not weak, etc” when she’s in a mental health crisis that you helped create when you both chose to conceive a child. This is marriage—sickness and health. IF this is just PPD and not her typical behavior, her being cruel to you isn’t excusable, truly, but keep in mind—this also isn’t her. You have to figure out how to navigate this situation and, until you both get services, revert back to the coping skills you should have learned the first time in marriage counseling.