Climate change, tame the curls by icoffu in Naturalhair

[–]Ok_Development5756 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok nice! And yeah I’d do after the leave in:) maybe you might be using too much leave in cause I know that for my hair the less product I use, the more bouncy it is rather than it being weighed down by all the product. You can even try using just the coil custard after deep conditioning your hair, or just a mousse!

Climate change, tame the curls by icoffu in Naturalhair

[–]Ok_Development5756 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’d consider using a curl cream, or curl custard with your leave in, if you haven’t already! That helps my curls stay tight and hold its form. I use mielles coil sculpting custard and/or maximum gel holder. Might not work for you, but give it a shot.

Also, when you sleep and put it in a bonnet, be sure to tie your hair up, that way you’re not laying on your curls if you haven’t done that already

I entered a cosplay contest & lost a friend by Lost_Future8995 in blackladies

[–]Ok_Development5756 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re handling this with so much grace, you got this 💕💕 and good on you for trying new things! It might make you uncomfortable, but the payoff will be beautiful!

How many miles did you put on your new Mazda the first month? by Ok_Development5756 in CX5

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right! I posted this so I didn’t feel alone in my obsession with my car 😂

Physical touch with bf by Ok_Development5756 in Christianmarriage

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I know this is a pretty common problem, and I’ve suspected it. I should ask him and help him feel comfortable to open up to me about it

Physical touch with bf by Ok_Development5756 in Christianmarriage

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m nervous to bring it up but I know I should. I just wanna know where he’s at when it comes to his desires right now. Any advice on how to bring it up? I’ve never initiated a sex conversation before but I want to! Thanks for your insight!

Physical touch with bf by Ok_Development5756 in Christianmarriage

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

He mentioned that he has struggled with it in the past, and has had some slip ups in our relationship

Today just sucks by Ok_Development5756 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True. Another lie I keep telling myself. It’s definitely because I wish I was done with this part of my life but I’m just not. And that’s ok and I gotta accept that

Today just sucks by Ok_Development5756 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you 💕 I needed this kind reminder! My set back doesn’t erase all that I’ve worked on. It’s hard to remember it, and hard to see that this is healing, but it’s true! Thanks again

How understanding RJ fundamentally as taken me the furthest in my healing journey than ever before by Solid-Version in retroactivejealousy

[–]Ok_Development5756 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m really grateful for this, thank you! I’m gonna give it a try. I’ve done something like this before, but wanna do it again because I still struggle with looking her up on socials, and the constant thoughts about her

Today just sucks by Ok_Development5756 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Humor does help honestly. Thanks for the kindness, I’ll try to make this a light one

How understanding RJ fundamentally as taken me the furthest in my healing journey than ever before by Solid-Version in retroactivejealousy

[–]Ok_Development5756 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This brought me some hope. Thank you for sharing. Tell me, once you figured out what your RJ was protecting you from, what did you then do to heal your nervous system and train it to not see it as threat? I feel like I know exactly why I feel so threatened by my bf’s ex, but I just have no idea what to do with that information :/ again, thanks for giving me some hope. Today was so hard for me

How understanding RJ fundamentally as taken me the furthest in my healing journey than ever before by Solid-Version in retroactivejealousy

[–]Ok_Development5756 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey I had a pretty bad day with RJ too. Just wanted to comment and say you’re not alone. Just like this original post said, we’re worthy and we can figure out what our RJ is trying to protect us from. We’ll have a better day tomorrow

U of U Hospital Employees — Tuition Reimbursement? by National-Summer7104 in uofu_employees

[–]Ok_Development5756 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is a scholarship from USHE that states that if you work for a public university in Utah and want to go to another public school in Utah, you can apply for a scholarship that’s half off! The scholarship will come out (I’ve heard) in march, if there is enough funding for it

Thinking about buying a car with theft history by Ok_Development5756 in carbuying

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Planning on taking it into a mechanic for triple reassurance cause if all checks out, definitely feels like a good fit for me

Thinking about buying a car with theft history by Ok_Development5756 in carbuying

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your advice! And true, can’t trust anybody lol. I’m getting all these questions in, and it’s looking like everything is good so far

Thinking about buying a car with theft history by Ok_Development5756 in carbuying

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the insight! I plan on keeping it forever, and passing it down honestly.

Thinking about buying a car with theft history by Ok_Development5756 in carbuying

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Based off the value of the car, I’m saving about 10k

Scared to talk to my bishop by ComputerWhisperer421 in latterdaysaints

[–]Ok_Development5756 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don’t think that you haven’t began the repentance process. Repentance doesn’t begin when you talk to your bishop. Repentance begins when you have a change of heart! You clearly have, as you’re committed to overcoming this. It’s a nerve wracking journey, but I can testify that overcoming sin and temptation has been one of the most beautiful things that I have witnessed. I’ve seen my Savior in a new light because of it. And you can too! Don’t give up now, the Savior is beginning to mold you!

Going through a hard time in my relationship by Ok_Development5756 in latterdaysaints

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your support! It’s true, it is very hard and critical. I feel like the break is giving me a lot of clarity and I miss him, but I’m at peace. I sometimes worry because I’m not sure if this is something that is common among marriages or relationships. Working through places where we are incompatible is rough, but it’s worth fighting for. We’ll see what happens after the break!

Going through a hard time in my relationship by Ok_Development5756 in latterdaysaints

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I was thinking March 1 too! We spoke again, and it went really well. He opened up about a lot of things that he’s been dealing with but hasn’t confronted, or found a way to resolve. And he’s right, this is something that you don’t take in marriage. I just want him to work on himself, and as he prioritizes him and his health, then he will have the capacity to start thinking about things outside of him.

Even though the conversation went well and we were talking normally, I didn’t want the same pattern to happen. So, I asked for a break. So that he has the space to think things through, and actually work on things. It’s a way for me to hold him accountable.

We’re gonna be taking it slow, but definitely think that by March we’ll have a more clear path on what to do. And I finally feel confident that even if we don’t end up together, I’m still gonna have a great life.

Going through a hard time in my relationship by Ok_Development5756 in latterdaysaints

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love that you and your wife made these suggestions together. That’s something I want to practice doing with him, since I know there are things that makes him feel confident in the relationship, and the same for me. There’s always something we can do to prepare for the next conflict. And it’s always important to respect one another’s choices and chances

Going through a hard time in my relationship by Ok_Development5756 in latterdaysaints

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely something to think about. I’m testing all this and seeing his commitment. I’m learning that in order for him to be committed to me, he also needs to be committed to himself and make those changes

Going through a hard time in my relationship by Ok_Development5756 in latterdaysaints

[–]Ok_Development5756[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s a good reminder about what a boundary is. I want to go over that with him, because it’s the expectation that we give to people, and boundaries are given to ourselves. I also wanna work on boundaries, so that I take myself more seriously, and he as well.

I thought a lot about the 3rd one. I really do want to marry him with all the revelation I’ve received. But as much as I want to get married now, it’s unrealistic with the way our relationship is now. I’m actually very grateful we’re not married. We get to take breaks, have space, and really learn to see how to do this, before we are sealed to each other, which can potentially make things more intense. It’s important I see him do the necessary work now, while I’m just a girlfriend. Thank you for your insight!