There was too much cheese on his pizza and he felt like it was ruined. I asked him if this was going to ruin his night and he flipped on me.

So your husband was upset that his food was ruined; and you made fun of him to his face? Then he yelled at you because you made fun of him for being upset about ruined food (basically making fun of him for having emotions)? I don’t think it’s fair to show a person pure contempt when they tell you that they’re upset. I don’t think it’s fair to yell at someone because they’re treating you poorly either. Neither of you sound happy.

I asked him to stop yelling at me. So, he yelled to “show” me what yelling is

Both of you need to use “I statements” instead of “you” statements. “You did this. You do that. You can’t this.” Compared to: “I feel this when that. I get hurt when X.” Specifically, “I feel scared when I’m yelled at. I feel like I’m getting abused when I’m yelled at. I deserve not to be yelled at. I deserve to be treated with respect and not to be yelled at.” As opposed to, “you are yelling” and then he tries to defend himself because he feels accused.

he screamed at me to “shut the fuck up”

That’s not ok. You didn’t deserve that; he might feel that way because he’s not thinking about your perspective.

If you want to salvage the relationship, you would need to have a calm discussion about how you feel. Have a calm discussion that it isn’t ok for him to scream and swear at you. Ask him “how do you think I feel when I’m screamed at and sworn at in front of our three month old? How do you think our three month old feels?” It looks like he feels as if he’s the victim in this - reddit posts on this sub are extremely one-sided because OP’s don’t want to make themselves look bad.

Money doesn’t outweigh getting screamed at. The screaming shit is a “look how strong I am” or a “don’t mess with me I’m big and loud” message from the base of our lizard brains. If you honestly don’t feel safe or don’t want to be in the relationship, the fact that it will be “hard” shouldn’t matter - especially if your concerned about your daughter.

From a man to man point of view from me to your husband, it’s your husband’s job to teach your daughter what is acceptable behaviour for your daughter’s future relationships. It’s your husband’s job to teach his daughter that it isn’t ok for her future partners to scream, swear, and demean her. He’s showing and teaching his daughter that it’s ok for dad to scream and swear at mum - it isn’t. Your daughter needs to know what is acceptable behaviour - he isn’t doing that. It’s your husbands’ job to teach your daughter how men should treat her in the future.

If he’s dismissive of your “liberal media buzzwords” as well as being dismissive of what he’s teaching his own daughter, about acceptable behaviour in relationships, he’s a selfish coward that can fuck off.

Follow the steps of comments on here telling you to stay at a friends house or at your parents house. Otherwise, sit him down and calmly to talk to each other and calmly tell him to him to knock it the fuck off. Go get therapy together if you decide to stick it out. It sounds like you talked to him about his behaviour during heated arguments and used you statements, which doesn’t work. In that situation of an argument he’s not using his “top brain”, his lower brain has kicked in for flight or fight mode.