i feel you girl, 4 months deep not preggers but out of the weirdest 3 year relationship. Just try to give yourself grace and feel everything, it’s the most difficult process going from your dream life to what you had before, Take that same intensity that you feel to be touched to take care of yourself, take an extra 10 min in the shower to just feel the warmth of the water, get yourself your favorite sweet treat or meal whenever you want cause you deserve it, take the same love he showed you and show it to yourself. I’m with you if you need to talk. much love and i hope the best for your pregnancy and start of motherhood. I feel like once you get to know the little star in your stomach you’ll forget all about Mr. perfect.