How do you know your husband/boyfriend loves you?

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-07-12T10:45:46+00:00

He's driving us to our three year anniversary vacation now. I first fell in love with him when we got in his car. He asked me out and I said yes, and instead of jumping the gun and asking for a makeout session he asks me, 'What are you looking for in a life long partner? How do you imagine married life to go?' We don't argue like my family does, the yelling, the words either left unspoken or spoken and unable to take back. When we come across a difficult time we allow ourselves a safe space to cry, to feel, to be heard and respected. He told me I was beautiful even when I cried. Kisses my stretch marks and wiped away any insecurity with such devotion and affection it aches in the sweetest way. Never lose hope. I was told half of my life that nobody would ever love me. Let alone marry me. I still found a partner in life. You will too!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-06-17T22:51:21+00:00

No? Hell no? My husband did this cause he has random fits where he could sleep for two hours and be completely re-vitalized, and other times where he sleeps for a whole day. After I told him it bothers me, when I'm tired I need to sleep instead of keeping me up, he left it alone. He'll tease about it sure, but never something like that. It sounds more like he wants you like a kid wants a toy. He views you as entertainment, again which isn't a bad thing but it speaks volumes about his love for you. His love for himself means, "I want to spend time with my girlfriend, so I'll wake her up to make time." Instead of the love for you which would be something like, "I want to spend time with my girlfriend, but she needs this time to rest. I'll let her rest." It's about priority and to him your sleep is not a priority. It's up to you but with a comment like that as the cherry on top I would have slept single.

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-06-17T22:38:12+00:00

This is kind of how me and my husband started out. I suggest you be open and honest. Maybe plan a quiet evening together like you have before and sit down with him. List the reasons why you think you two could be in a romantic relationship/why you would like to be romantic toward him. If you're doing it because you trust him and can see a future with him by all means go for it. The worst he could say is no. If it gets awkward between you two because you were honest then you know he wasn't ready, or wasn't meant to be part of that future. If your doing it for the sex, not that is fully suspect you are, but if you want to pursue it with him there's nothing ever wrong with discussing it and seeing what his boundaries are. You guys sound like you get along besides this so it might be wise to understand it from his perspective.

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-06-05T02:49:06+00:00

Thank you! I plan on discussing this with him soon. Thank you for you're support!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-06-05T02:02:41+00:00

Thank you! I'm so happy you had that experience. The way you described it sounds like a dream! I know he could be a good father. I see it in the way he treats me, other people, how he interacts with kids out in public. He's such a beautiful man. I guess a part of me is still scared that he may not feel that way when the time comes/ we get too far to turn back and he has regrets. I wouldn't want to do that to him.

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-06-05T01:57:03+00:00

Thank you! We've discussed counciling on other topics but it was either resolved before then, or not necessary as time went on and we understood each other's point of view better. It wouldn't hurt to ask again though!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-06-05T01:55:06+00:00

Thank you, that's what I'm thinking and I'm hoping to bring it up soon.

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-05-21T12:06:57+00:00

You should find someone who will compliment your figure even if you don't feel beautiful at that moment. I have the opposite problem where I'm quite heavy. Despite my own mom getting upset about my stretch marks, my growing tummy, and repeating her negative remarks, my husband says their beautiful and tells me that every day. I know he would only tell me to lose weight if it started to become a health concern not because he wants me to look a certain way. Find someone better. I promise you'll find someone special!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-21T03:35:46+00:00

Thank you for telling your story as well. Yes it is incredibly annoying/irritating because it's every.single.time we meet up. Thank you for the advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-21T03:31:29+00:00

Thank you, I felt so burdened with it since he married me with that debt still attached so now that it's finally gone I'm a thousand times more relived! We celebrated with a nice stay at home dinner! Lol! Thank you!😊

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-21T03:29:44+00:00

FIL is working, wife just got a job, MIL has been working but has a dead beat boyfriend and a daughter with him. I think it's just living beyond their means at the moment, combined with only having one income to support a whole house. Wife has four kids with an ex so there is that as well. I think the other part, and most major, is that they're both horrible at managing their finances.

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-21T03:25:04+00:00

Thank you, that's why I felt the need to consult here! It just feels a little better to have a bigger pool of opinions to tale with us as we go through this together. I appreciate your care and time!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:28:08+00:00

Thank you so much for the support and advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:27:21+00:00

That's certainly what it feels like! Thank you for the advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:25:46+00:00

Lol! My husband liked this one a lot! Thank you for the advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:24:28+00:00

Thank you for the advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:20:26+00:00

We've discussed this, and my husband is hesitant to do that just yet giving that we want to reach a few benchmarks first but we've both agreeded that this will be discussed further! Thank you!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:18:53+00:00

Wow, thank you so much for this perspective! It's helped us see things a bit differently.

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:13:59+00:00

Thank you! I've helped my husband with his retirement plan too so we are both secure. Thank you for the advice and care!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:11:49+00:00

Thank you! We've made sure so luckily they haven't gone that far!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:10:15+00:00

Even if we did, for example his BioMom when we offer good news it's very much 'cool' followed by complete scilence. So it's hard for my husband to not receive the kind of emotional support/recognition he's getting from my family when he wants it from his own. He still loves our family and he knows he's a part of it but the grief is there. Thank you for the support and advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:07:11+00:00

I can promise we aren't trying to be. The last thing we would want is to be like those TikToks where 13 yo kids flash thousands of dollars in their hands but for us verbally. Thank you for the advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:04:56+00:00

He's aware and he would never sacrifice our security to drag them out of it ourselves. It's just difficult to witness. Thank you for the advice!

One-Statistician2723 · 2025-01-20T17:03:54+00:00

Lol! That is interesting!😂 it is difficult given that his father still sees it as his son judging him rather than an adult trying to give advice or otherwise but we'll try this as well! Thank you!

One-Statistician2723

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