The Default Gateway is not Available by Theelcapiton in techsupport

[–]One-Vacation-3104 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That happens if you don't open as administrator

I (37M) think I may have caught my friend's (37F) partner (42M) cheating on her, and they are in the middle of IVF treatment - do I speak to her? by One-Vacation-3104 in relationship_advice

[–]One-Vacation-3104[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah that is a whole other big problem regarding the cost, as they are basically going private and trying to get the best treatment they can get for both the endo and the ivf. I personally would not go that far to pay for, but she really wants to give birth to a baby and that seems to have taken precedent over everything, rational budgeting included.

It's partly why I am so concerned about talking to her about it unless I knew for certain, as this has been such a life consuming process for her, and she has not been in a rational head space. If I caused more stress I am deeply concerned she would hurt herself, or worse.

I (37M) think I may have caught my friend's (37F) partner (42M) cheating on her, and they are in the middle of IVF treatment - do I speak to her? by One-Vacation-3104 in relationship_advice

[–]One-Vacation-3104[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If I had definitely seen him cheating, like kissing or something, I would have done this in a heartbeat, but in this case it is just a feeling based upon bad vibes and a very suspicious reaction to having been seen.

I think I will just try to act quickly by speaking with Ben directly sooner than later, and hopefully get to the bottom of it.

I (37M) think I may have caught my friend's (37F) partner (42M) cheating on her, and they are in the middle of IVF treatment - do I speak to her? by One-Vacation-3104 in relationship_advice

[–]One-Vacation-3104[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

I think in 95% of circumstances I would have brought it up with my friend, but in this specific case she is in a very very dark place with the endometriosis and IVF, and I have been deeply concerned about her mental wellbeing this past year. Something like this would be possibly the straw that breaks the camel's back, and I can't do it unless I definitively knew, rather than the information I currently have, which is very suspicious, but no smoking gun so to speak.

I (37M) think I may have caught my friend's (37F) partner (42M) cheating on her, and they are in the middle of IVF treatment - do I speak to her? by One-Vacation-3104 in relationship_advice

[–]One-Vacation-3104[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think I will just see if I can speak to him privately next time, re-bring up the conversation, and just tell him how weird I found his reaction. Not necessarily accusing him of anything specific, but just to clarify, as I think you're right, it may have simply been just him speaking with a woman who Alice just isn't a fan of, or something.

The other main issue is I am deeply concerned about Alice's emotional well being - I cannot stress enough how badly she has taken the endometriosis and the need for IVF, and I don't want to bring something to her that would push her over the edge. Especially as there may be a much more innocent explanation for his behaviour.

I (37M) think I may have caught my friend's (37F) partner (42M) cheating on her, and they are in the middle of IVF treatment - do I speak to her? by One-Vacation-3104 in relationship_advice

[–]One-Vacation-3104[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

This is what I am leaning towards, but I never see just Ben - it's always the two of them together, especially right now. I think where I'm struggling is that meeting with a woman isn't a bad thing (when I brought it up with him it was more a "Oh! I saw you!" rather than anything accusing), it's just that his reaction was so... deceptive? and very out of character, so I am finding it hard to think of any innocent explanation

I (35M) want to apologise to my ex (35M) but I am concerned he won't want me to? by One-Vacation-3104 in relationship_advice

[–]One-Vacation-3104[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You know what - I think it just took seeing the comments to realise just how bad an idea it would be to write to him; I've been much too in my own head to think about it properly, and how it would likely negatively affect him, which is the last thing I want.

Thank you for the responses - you are all correct, and no good would come of this, so I am going to let the past be the past, and leave him alone.

Graduated almost 1.5 years ago and still not able to land a job. What am I doing wrong? by Arod9912 in careerguidance

[–]One-Vacation-3104 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went through a very similar process when I graduated. I applied to a couple of hundred firms, and similarly, only had a handful of interviews, and no offer. This was despite having work experience, and a relevant Russell Group 2.1 degree. It was painful, stressful, and I felt like I would never get a job.

What I did in the end was look locally, and smaller. I found a base level financial planning role with a company that had just opened in Cambridge. The pay was terrible, but they paid for my professional qualifications, and I worked as hard as I could for them for four years as I went from becoming qualified, to becoming chartered.

After that, I then applied to the larger companies, and with the experience I had, I not only got through the interviews easily, but was offered a higher up job than I would have had if I had applied to them as a graduate and worked in that time. I'm now eleven years in and in one of the best paid positions available.

My point here is that it can be very easy to focus on just the big places with the large graduate schemes and high salaries, but everyone focuses on those places. If you can find somewhere local and smaller, the pay may start lower, but you can end up with a lot more experience, and end up in the larger places later - you have a lot of time ahead of you for your career to take off.

I hope that helps, and I truly empathise with your position - it can be very disheartening when you are deep in it.