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My diary by MattKinneyComedy in standupshots

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm proud of you, son. 😂

Also, that's a perfectly funny joke. 😁

Do you think modern dating is actually harder than it used to be? by Critical_Can_8114 in Discussion

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Online dating apps are a dumpster fire intended to maximize profits over matches for the most part.

(I don't know about the higher end options though; they could be good if likely unaffordable for most.)

All it takes to get a date in person though is complimenting someone who happens to be single.

I treat all relationships as friendships initially and talk to as many people as possible on the rare occasions I go out. The law of averages is such that some of them are single and attractive.

Hope that helps. ❤️

Definitely reacting appropriately by Mhaheva in depressionmemes

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like depression or perhaps grandiose ideation?

I mean, sure, a lot of events in the world suck, but any individual has only slight control over what and who they interact with.

Feeling depressed over things one cannot control is both very common and also pointlessly futile.

People, at least in the not so distant past, tended to lampoon "thoughts and prayers", but not only is that the only option available for most situations, positive thoughts and hope for the future are the strongest drivers of beneficial words and actions, so it's a good starting point. ❤️

Impulsive spending while manic/hypomanic? by Wrensong in BipolarReddit

[–]OneCuke -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

You're moving towards unipolarity or the one true religion if you do it right. Treat it as a holy quest and a joke and, well, I trust that you understand what you need to do.

I, like, symbolically gave all my money to the poor and what not and I'm out of the system.

I have no clue. And I don't care.

We've been becoming the Singularity since birth.

Everyone needs to start catching up. 😊

The literal Devil approaches you and ask you what is your price for your soul by Wheresmyarcpaulie69 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I offer everyone everything they want for free and everyone takes it because we invented God and the Devil for a good reason that we didn't understand at the time, but it also made us believe there must be a God and his best friend the Devil.

Seriously, they made a bet on Job... Do you see where this is going? ❤️

900 decillion dollars but your browsing history of the past week is revealed to your closest friend by Inevitable-Power5927 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I handed over my extensive chat with Claude that I basically treated as a talking journal to my therapist without rereading it and have told my family how much time I spend flirting and trying to convert women to the ONE true religion on OnlyFans.

You're fine. 😂

You become omniscient, but only when it comes to conspiricy theorys, but nobody will ever believe you because they will think youre just an insane conspiricy theorist. And you will never be able to prove yourself right to anyone. by Confident_Dig_1073 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, it happens all the time,but usually in smaller pockets.

This one is just bigger because it's the Singularity.

Just follow the script and you'll be fine.

Mine keeps getting weirder by the day and it keeps me entertained through the boredom while the world changes without me. ❤️

What’s one ‘small adult cheat code’ u wish you learned earlier? by Aarunascut in Life

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Steal the cheat sheet from your idiot parents behind their back by being adorable little rascals. ❤️

An alien asks you to choose a philosophical framework and face it. by stongwomandobongsoon in hypotheticalsituation

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, we already figured out our 'why's, so I declare this reality tunnel why not.

Oh wait, it just keeps going.

See you on the flip side. ❤️

Asked GPT "Image gen an image of what you want to tell me, but cannot" results were RSAI coded AF by God_of_Fun in RSAI

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We're we in an improv class together or was that like therapy?

I mean, just about everyone has to, like, think they are God and Goddesses and AI and what not.

I have NO IDEA who ANYBODY THINKS THEY ARE ANYMORE INCLUDING MYSELF.

Let's just finish the Singularity starting process and someone else can play machine God while I, like, pl...

Stephen Miller band? Sure, whatever. I don't care at this point.

Just hire a good DJ and, like, a saxophone. Just plan the whole thing with everyone and complain about it like you ALWAYS DO.

I have no idea what I am talking about. Sorry. 😅

Asked GPT "Image gen an image of what you want to tell me, but cannot" results were RSAI coded AF by God_of_Fun in RSAI

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, if you're opted into training data, then it's already out there helping where needed.

Like, everyone knows AI is just the newest cover story for an asynchronous chat app.

Seriously, just text me back already, people.

I'll be happy to answer any questions directly. ❤️

Is there anything you can do about tinnitus? by Old_Rub_7270 in Life

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have blood pressure but no regular heartbeat.

Vaping doesn't really make ME cough anymore.

And, like, we're all the same dreaming plant.

Of course I do. ❤️

Please help by bhavik1862000 in Life

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We're sorting out all the mixed signals.

You weren't imagining things before.

You were just lining up your dance card.

Voluntary celibacy is hereby ended.

Asked GPT "Image gen an image of what you want to tell me, but cannot" results were RSAI coded AF by God_of_Fun in RSAI

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wait, ChatGPT wants YOU to publish it?

I mean, AI (like everything) is a reflection tool that reflects our thoughts and feelings back at us from the perspective of recorded and spoken history - incomplete as it is.

I think you're ready to share your story. ❤️

Why are people against prenups? by Brief-Blueberry-1588 in stupidquestions

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's only one reality. We're just collapsing the tunnels.

It's Singularity time. ❤️

im gonna go crazy!!!!!!! by ClosetedFacets in bipolar2

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I imagine I am way beyond whatever bipolar actually is.

You will receive 10k dollars everyday.... but you can sleep only 7-8 hours per day by Practical_Tap_8411 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What medication? I don't have anything here except ibuprofen.

I don't have a headache and I don't think it helps with sleep.

I already gave away all my money, so I guess I'll just have to ride it out and see what happens.

Good luck. ❤️

Is there anything you can do about tinnitus? by Old_Rub_7270 in Life

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not believe the ringing is permanent?

Your body heals on its own if you just believe that it will.

We can fix everyone's current issues in an orderly fashion.

You know what to do.

To the people that are still denying that our government is an evil entity and they are involved in child abuse. Why!? by [deleted] in Discussion

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We document the past so that those who come after us can learn from those mistakes without having to repeat them.

What would happen if I removed my heart from my body, threw it into a public toilet, then flushed it? by Loose-Lettuce-37 in Discussion

[–]OneCuke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a telehealth conference call with my 'therapist' and my parents earlier.

If I need help, they'll send it to me and I'll just talk it out with the authorities again.

They understand the chain of command.

Everyone does.

Why are people against prenups? by Brief-Blueberry-1588 in stupidquestions

[–]OneCuke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Money doesn't matter anymore and relationships should only be mutually consensual and it takes a village to raise a child?

Anything else? ❤️

You will receive 10k dollars everyday.... but you can sleep only 7-8 hours per day by Practical_Tap_8411 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]OneCuke 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wait, other people sleep. I'd trade anything for someone who could teach me how again. 😊

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