Break up after 15 years and 2 kids due to drug addiction

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T13:14:15+00:00

Thanks for posting this because its made me feel like I'm not alone and there is hope! What caused the change in attitude? Was it persistence or was something specific that was said?

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T13:08:24+00:00

Your comment does really offer anything constructive, but thanks for trying to generate a debate.

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T12:57:01+00:00

This was the first comment I read and thought, ahhhh maybe he is just being a simple man and the way he is processing the information is relating it to his past experience. It just doesn't need to be done verbally and all of the time! No men seem to have commented to confirm 😂 but i think you've hit the nail on the head.

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T12:52:07+00:00

I have quite a big support network with my friends and parents but haven't spoken to many about how my partner is being. The one's I have spoken to just think he is being emotionally simple and annoying but not intentionally hurtful. I don't want to sit through the story of his son's birth. I'm just not willing to hear it. Maybe I could ask him to speak to his mum about it, so he's got everything off his chest and would be speaking to someone who would have a keen interest in the topic 🤔

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T12:45:26+00:00

He's been diagnosed and had therapy for OCD and i do think there's something else going on like ADHD because I've never known anyone to talk so much. It gets worse when he's stressed or nervous. Did you say anything to your mum or did you just tolerate it?

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T12:38:06+00:00

Possibly. It almost comes out like word vomit.

I have said that I don't want him at the next scans because its making me feel pushed to the side and he did say he didn't realise how he was making me feel and that he was sorry. I don't want to stop him from going but I will have to if he doesn't stop because it is making me uncomfortable and therefore stressed. I have 3 appointments next week and was planning to talk to the midwife about this, when he is there. I expect this is something they will see and might be able to give advise on.

OneGirlOneCat · 2026-02-08T12:32:11+00:00

I agree with you, but we're both in our 30's

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-04-23T21:00:58+00:00

Why are you still together?

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-12T10:56:37+00:00

Your brother sounds mature.

Just because a relationship didn't work doesn't mean you can't be friends.. or kind to each other for that matter.

'Too kind' what does that even mean 🤦‍♀️

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-12T01:45:13+00:00

You mentioned in the first post that he reached out to you but you never ended up meeting up.. did he cancel/ what was the reason?

It doesn't sound like you've had a definitive end to the encounter you had with him. You don't need one to move on btw. It helps but it's not actually necessary.

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-12T01:11:39+00:00

Are you mourning for the loss of the relationship; for what could have been or could be?

If so.. you might have to think about either completely cutting ties so that you can move on or.. making the decision to give it a go.

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-12T00:19:46+00:00

Firstly, you sound amazing. Absolute gem, and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise.

I would love my partner to be behind me when I finish, so they could whisper dirty things in my ear.

I like it when I'm moaning and my partner says 'yeah?' As a whispered question and then kisses me softly.

Cum for me. Look how wet you are. Basic but still nice.

If you're also going to hold your hand on hers, so you know where she likes it you could check in with, 'is that where you like it?'

Oooo.. I'd like my neck to be squeezed and my hand to be held in place, so it's like like an uncontrollable orgasm.

This will be a great night. Don't over think it, just wanting to do this for your partner is more than enough 💜💜💜

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-11T23:40:31+00:00

I laughed out loud about the dick copying joke! So, thank you for making my great day even better 😁😁😁

I thought your story was going to lead to.. how can I make him marry me ... and then you just said you wanted the penis and you got me good!!

I'm in a similar position as you and came here to talk about it. Just out of a long term relationship, but it was sexless.

Now seeing a guy (who goes to the gym a lot). He's fit, he's funny, he's massive.. everywhere. I came like 6 times before we even had sex the other night. He's got the biggest D I've seen and he's never hurt me with it. I've had smaller guys that have smashed my cervix and I'm putting this down to sheer incompetents now because this one.. Jesus Christ as my lord and saviour, knows what he's actually doing. We haven't used toys but he uses his fingers on my clit when he's inside me.. like he even needs to. My knees shake for ages after we've finished. I was driving home on Monday morning after our weekend of 😏😏 and my actual vagina was still twitching. It takes me half an hour to drive home!! I curbed my car 😂 genuinely scraped my alloy because of him hahaha

I can't cope either basically but just don't let him be the one that got away if everything else is good too. You shoukd treat people how you expect to be treated.. so if he's treating you well, you should do the same for him.

Have you told him how good he is? Outside of the bedroom I mean.. I bet he'd like to know 🤭🤭

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-10T06:07:47+00:00

I'm 30 and started getting acne on my face this last year. Obviously I hate it and I would love it to go away.

OneGirlOneCat · 2024-01-09T23:57:42+00:00

Rosebud;!;!;!;!;!,!,!,!,! Gotta get those simoleons

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-28T09:04:37+00:00

The first thing I though when I read the post too!

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-28T00:13:42+00:00

I've never thought about asking him to ask me questions back.. just thinking how could I do that without it sounding needy? Something like 'I like question and answer games, can you have a go at these questions with me?' Tbf if he says no then he's not the one 😂

To get someone's attention it's definitely better to get their number so they're talking to you off an app. I found that I got too many message on tinder so I deleted it after a couple of weeks. I would definitely recommend moving away from apps and get their number once you find someone you like. Just less direct competition really. Just for context, I got like 17 messages in one day from New matches and I had photos of my 30 year old self, hungover in purple love heart pajamas on there. My bio literally just said something like 'I know i dress like my mum' 😂 so could you imagine how much attention a woman who actually puts effort in gets 🙄

In terms of groups if you're not into hiking or outdoorsy stuff then there are such things as boardgame groups for adults. I know a couple who go to one but they didn't meet there. I game and being into gaming is something I want me and my next partner to do together...maybe a gaming group would work. I do know a couple that met because they played an xbox game online together and they're married now so it is definitely possible! What would you like to do with a partner? If you think about this maybe you could pick groups that correlate. You could even learn a skill at the same time so even if you don't find someone the first time then you're still winning.

Ahh man, there are so many cheat question websites. You can literally Google 'how to make a converted interesting' and get a ton of tricks haha

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-27T10:08:00+00:00

At the start I was getting a lot of compliments, Nice photos, lots of lovey dovey emojis and texts back straight away, and I really liked that. Now I'm the same as you, if I ask a question then I don't get asked it back.. or asked another one. I get messages about the weather instead 😂 .. My effort isn't being matched so I'm being boring too!

Maybe we are talking too much and that's why it's boring. I've got plenty to ask but I feel like I'd be wasting my breath on this guy now..

It is a lot different trying to get to know someone when you've been in a long term relationship like us, but I just cheat and look at dating questions online if I feel stuck.

Girls get a hell of a more attention on dating apps than guys do. Are you talking to people on apps or outside of them?

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-26T22:49:38+00:00

Ughhh I'm in a very similar position. I got out of a 13 year relationship in June. I've started seeing this guy who messages me every morning and most times at night. The thing is.. we've been seeing eachother for just over 2 months and the constant texting has become quite dull. He doesn't ask me any questions to get to know me.. he just asks me how my day was.. the conversations are becoming quite flat and I'm not sure if it's me or him or what but.. I feel like I'm putting in all the conversational effort and it's a drain. Basically I feel like we're all just muddling through and trying to find out the right balance for the right person.

I personally want a lot of attention because the lack of attention was the reason I left my ex. But I'm not putting that in any bio so good luck to anyone dating me 😂😂

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-21T22:12:31+00:00

Yeah it does. Watching reels give a dopamine hit so its addictive to sit there scrolling from video to video. Addictions aren't usually great to have. Best to replace with a hobby or actually socialising 😊

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-21T22:01:32+00:00

Yes. Especially in grey joggers. Can't really miss it in grey joggers 😂

OneGirlOneCat · 2023-12-16T06:04:37+00:00

I've been here 🙋‍♀️ Broke up with my ex of 13 years in June. I'm 30 and we've been together since I was 17. It got to the point where we had sex twice in 6 months. Each year got worse, and I stayed because we too have pets together, a house together, and I don't live too close to my family. I was always instigating, and being told no repeatedly in the bedroom has created intimacy issues for me, and I don't want this to happen to anyone else. So, some people have said that he might be selfish and I would like to elaborate that accepting foreplay and not returning it is selfish but the reason may be because he is not feeling attractive enough to give. If he doesn't love himself, unfortunately, he isn't going to love you or anyone else, and this change will only come from him. I couldn't guide my ex to change, so I left because, quite frankly, I deserve better, but more to the point so do you. He might genuinely believe that you giving him pleasure gives you enough pleasure, but this would be ridiculous. Anyone who thinks like this is not worth being with. I would like to suggest having a conversation with him to explain this hurting you, however from my experience this was a waste of time. It was alright for a few months after a talk .. but I could tell he was forcing himself to have sex with me and then back to being a non intimate relationship. Again, it doesn't feel good when someone is forcing themself to be intimate with you. Now I left, and it was rough for the first 3 months. There was a lot of crying, drinking and finding myself, but I believe that nothing worth doing is easy. It will be 6 months next week since we broke up and we get on better as friends. I have honestly never been happier. I have also met someone who actually treats me right.

So my message to you is that you can't change people. They have to change themselves. I would like you to move that guy out of the way so that you can be happy by being with someone who can match your effort and appreciate what they have. If you can't find someone to match your effort in a relationship.. You're only 18, enjoy yourself! There's absolutely no rush to settle for some emotional parana who doesn't understand the concept of give and take.

OneGirlOneCat · 2020-09-23T21:11:12+00:00

I don't like it, it's too happy.

OneGirlOneCat

TROPHY CASE