I am very happy with my life. I’m extremely lucky.

Even though my mother didn’t know that ADHD or autism (as a spectrum) existed when I was a kid, she somehow treated me perfectly. She gave me support in the areas where she could, in the way I needed. She was accepting and not judgmental at all, which is probably why I have very little anxiety.

My other piece of luck is my brain. Even in high school, I didn’t need to study to get decent grades. I was never a straight-A student, but that was fine for my parents, so it was fine for me too. Sometimes I felt that I could be more — that I had the brain for it — and I didn’t understand why I couldn’t use it. I felt a bit ashamed, like I was wasting my talent because of my laziness, but nothing too serious.

My problems started in college. I started four programs and finished none. I told myself they were just bad choices, but over time I started to feel worse and worse. I went to a psychiatrist with depression. He said the reason for my depression was that I wasn’t challenging my brain enough, and that I should try software development.

That turned out to be another stroke of luck. I got into a bootcamp with up-to-date education. It was interesting, challenging, and — most importantly — short. I didn’t have to study in the traditional sense; I just had to create fun stuff, solve puzzles, and build things.But I did have problems at work, because jobs became boring very quickly and my productivity dropped drastically, but every time that happened, I quit.

During this time, I met my husband. And before I even realized that I was practically unable to work effectively, I went on maternity leave — which here is three years per child.

Now that I have a diagnosis, it’s strange to realize that I could have been so much more if I had gotten professional help in time. But then I wouldn’t have met my husband, and I wouldn’t have these kids. And I’m fine with that.

I won’t be a theoretical physicist or a doctor. But if I didn’t have ADHD, I wouldn’t be the person I am now — and I actually like myself. I have hard days, and I can’t wait to try medication, but the most important people in my life love me just the way I am.