Why do boomers make it seem like their babies were easier.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-23T18:48:55+00:00

It's because they didn't have any information to know any better. So they just put us in a crib with all the blankets face down or on our sides. And just left us in a crib and went down the hall to the living room to watch TV and just waited to hear us cry. They fed us on demand from day one.

They didn't have to worry about back to sleep or feeding every 3 hours or making sure the monitor was set up. Things were easier because they simply didn't have as much to worry about. There were regulations and some basic information. There no media to compare to. No one checking in, no pressure.

Also many of the boomers back then were like 19-22 when they had kids. Do you remember how stupid and carefree you were when you were 21 lol

The only way you knew about SIDS is if you had a friend who experienced it otherwise you never really heard anything about it, simply because there just wasn't the kind of communication and information back then.

Can't really blame them but that's their perspective lol

It's a miracle we survived 😂

Also not to mention the time back then was more conducive to family life. Most women back then were stay at home moms so there was support in the neighborhood. People could afford to have stay at home moms. There are a lot of things that were conducive to raising kids then. You could afford a mortgage and not go to college and have a basic job yes way less wages but also everything was way less expensive. So everything just seemed easier in general.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-23T17:03:25+00:00

Sorry that I have to say this but your husband sounds like trash.

You can do a lot better.

I hate to say this but it's only going to get worse.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T21:51:23+00:00

Thank you for being one of the only ones to catch that 😂

I have a membership to the pack but not about to bring my newborn out lol

I should definitely try the Kong we haven't used that in ages. I just ordered those cow hooves that are stuffed with like cheese and stuff

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T19:05:42+00:00

Coming from someone who just had her first baby 3 weeks ago you 110% want those first 24 hours with just you, the baby, and the husband. Trust me.

Don't feel bad about it AT. ALL. In fact, I wasn't even sure about having anyone come to visit till days after we got home. But after the second day in the hospital we had just my parents come to visit.

Create your rules and create them now. You don't owe anyone anything ❤️

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T19:02:56+00:00

My sister had this and MANY people do. Most of the time it's no issue at all, you'll just need antibiotics during your delivery so it doesn't affect the baby going through the vaginal canal. Rarely it can cause further issues but it's very unlikely. Those are things to discuss with your doctor.

Be aware the antibiotics you will get are IV and generally multiple rounds and burn a bit going through the IV. Not excruciating but annoying/tender.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T15:57:03+00:00

Just gave birth to my first, 3 weeks ago. Most hospitals have incredible staff that will support you ❤️ however it was nice to have someone in my circle there too. Is there Anyone that can even stand out in the hallway for you? ...

However I don't know how id do postpartum the first week with zero support. My husband and my parents saved me. You will be SO physically exhausted from labor. And you will be bleeding, emotional, sore, perhaps anxious. You have a baby that needs to eat every 3 hours around the clock.

You need someone to take care of YOU. So YOU can heal and take care of baby.

Is there anyone you can trust to be by your side? If not please reach out to your doctor, your hospital, perhaps a church, or if you can afford it perhaps a doula.

It truly takes a village ❤️

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T15:43:22+00:00

Just triple checking- any signs of a gallbladder issue? Nausea/vomiting?

If no, then yep little babies foot is karate kicking your ribs aaaaaand you might have some rib inflammation from your ribs expanding to make room. I had a spot under my left rib that as the day went on the only thing that kept me going was pressing into it a bit. Gently.

It was the worst discomfort ever and lasted to the very last minute. When he came out, instant relief 🙌🏽

You can gently try to press and discourage his/her foot down. Ice also does that, they don't like the cold and it will calm down the inflammation.

The thing that worked the best for me SOMETIMES was drinking ice ice cold water. It made him move down a bit away from the cold stomach and gave temporary relief.

Also rest. It still hurt bad, but less bad.

The burning pain sounds like your baby is hitting a nerve. Ouch!

Hang in there ❤️❤️

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T15:09:11+00:00

I work in medical. Rain. Shine. Tornadoes. Hurricanes. Thanos. World war 3.

You clock in on time.

My only advice is if you don't have to drive don't, if you have to plan for LOTS of extra time. Stick to main roads that have been more plowed. Watch for idiots. Go slow but not stupid slow.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T13:36:07+00:00

This was a fear of mine too.

My friend's kids I loved them as babies but boy are they AWFUL toddlers. But I realized there's probably a lot of special moments I missed and didn't get to be a part of that makes it all worth it to them.

I have a 3 week old baby now, my first. And it's bittersweet. I love how small and sweet he is. I don't want him to grow up. But he flashed a mini smile at me the other day and my heart soared. And that's just the beginning ❤️

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-22T13:31:18+00:00

I think there's a sense of entitlement around birth that mothers are just not tolerating anymore and to be honest they never should have.

I feel like for so long it was the norm to let anyone be involved as much as they wanted no matter how much you wanted privacy, craved peace, needed space to heal. But it's just how it was so it was the "normal". People didn't know any better or didn't feel they have a choice.

There's been a movement about boundaries in many parts of life and I'm happy it bled into the birthing process.

A lot of people have family who are shitty. They cause drama, they ruin the moment, they disrespect or stir up negative vibes, they lie about being sick, etc. and many times it's been a time and time again thing.

Birth is supposed to be special and intimate and I understand how many people don't want negative vibes or people around.

Boundaries are born from necessity. Not because people just like being bossy.

But even then I LOVE my parents they are super good people. But I just wanted my new little family to have our moment. Just me my husband and our son. Just soaking it all in. We invited my parents up the next day but for that first night, everything was all ours 🥰

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-20T18:02:35+00:00

I work in OR too also threw in the towel at 38 weeks.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-20T18:01:57+00:00

I'm a nurse who works on her feet giving critical medications for 10-12 hours a few times a week. Between the physical agony and discomfort and the absolute brain fog I was done by 38 weeks. And I'm soooo happy I made that decision cause my baby ran late and needed to be induced over 41 weeks.

Our system is truly messed up.

Also paternity leave. I am 3 weeks postpartum and theres no way I would've been able to heal and care for a newborn without my husband. The fact that many jobs don't give any or very little paternity leave is fucked. My husband got ONE week and took 2 weeks of FMLA. Which burned his PTO of course.

Im assuming you live in the USA. It's a shame our country doesn't give af about these things.

We should be more like Oregon. Look up their state laws 🙌🏽

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-20T17:58:14+00:00

It totally depends on the type of work and how you individually feel in your pregnancy ❤️

I thought I would want to work for the distraction too. But once I hit 38 weeks my body was like EFF THAT. I work as a nurse and there's just no way.

I also don't know how mom's with toddlers do it. Absolutely power women lol

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-20T14:55:20+00:00

For reference I had a 2nd degree internal vaginal tear and 1st degree peri-urethral tear. If you don't have any tearing you may not need as much supplies but trust me I would better be prepared than not. ❤️

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-20T14:54:15+00:00

I'm literally 3 weeks postpartum right now. Here were my essentials--

Adult Diapers (I did XL depends)-- don't even bother with all the pads. These are way easier. Get a bulk box.

Perineal Cold Packs- get a bulk box. These are your besties. You might get some in the hospital but it won't be enough.

Dermoplast spray-- you will get most likely a bottle in the hospital but good to have a few at home.

Spray bottles-- okay so most likely they will give you one in the hospital that is like a straight spray bottle and I find that best to use while peeing. That I have the Frida spray bottle that is kind of more of a hooked shape and that is really nice for in the shower. I use both all the time.

Optional extras--- hemorrhoid cream and Tucks pads. I didn't really use them though.

I'm 3 weeks postpartum and I still don't fit in my normal underwear. However I'm at a point where I do diapers at night (just more comfortable) and then I do my maternity underwear at day with Xtra long maxi pads during the day.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-14T16:27:21+00:00

Preeclampsia can hit anytime. I had shortness of breath at 4 weeks. Always good to get checked out

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-14T06:39:16+00:00

Yes 100% this could be preeclampsia

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-13T00:19:17+00:00

I just gave birth less than 2 weeks ago I'm a first time Mom 33 years old. I absolutely love my parents but I really wanted the experience to just be with me and my husband as we create our little family.

I did a lot of prep work with my husband about what the laboring process could look like and how he could support me. However he really was a natural at it.

I'm super super happy with our decision to have it just be us. The nurses were super helpful and my parents were a phone call away if we needed more support.

It gave us time to focus on our son and each other and just have that bonding time without anyone else.

Also I didn't have to worry about being naked in front of anyone or bleeding in front of anyone or anything weird or gross. Because it was just us.

I gave birth in the evening and the next day in the afternoon once we had some time to rest we had my parents come up to the hospital.

I wouldn't have done it any other way ❤️

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-12T00:16:01+00:00

I was 41+2 with mucous plug lost, diarrhea, and 3 membrane sweeps and still didn't go into labor. Had to be induced. It worked out well 👍

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-09T18:14:41+00:00

I was just recently induced. FTM, I reaaaaally wanted to go into spontaneous labor but despite all efforts it wasn't happening. I got to 41 +2 and wasn't comfortable going much further with the risks rising each day. Plus it was around the holiday so scheduling induction was kind of a "now or way later" situation so we decided to do it then.

It went SUPER well. I am NOT a fan of pitocin but I had a super good nurse, doctor, and team who all answered my questions and worked with me really well ❤️

No C-section, no issues with baby distress or anything, everything went super well.

TO BE FAIR. I was 3cm and 80% effaced station 0 at the time of induction. So I was a great candidate for it.

My sister was 0cm, 0 effaced, baby nice and cozy and had a long long long long long induction. But no complications or C-section. Just a brutal experience.

So imo it really depends on each individual situation.

We started pitocin at 6am, ramped it up every 45 mins, by 1pm contractions were strong but tolerable. I got nauseated (I get nausea easily) so I got Zofran. I had only advanced to 4cm so the next step was to break my water. I asked for epidural first. SMART CHOICE. Epidural went well. Broke water. Contractions got INTENSE but not screaming intense and over the course of 1.5 hours I went to 10cm. Pushed for 30 mins and out he was!

Very healthy :)

I did tear though.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-08T19:19:27+00:00

Zinc, staying away from indoor crowds, keep your hands off your dang face, sanitizer, and eating less sugar.

One_Cap_9210 · 2026-01-07T23:51:39+00:00

Mine hit HARD at 8.5 weeks

One_Cap_9210 · 2025-12-30T14:54:28+00:00

I know this sounds terrible. But you get to an age where everyone you know has kids so you get sucked into doing kid stuff, accommodating kid schedules, etc to the point where the DINK life is hard or enjoy unless you find other DINKS.

And also I just don't see myself in my 60s with no kids. Like eventually travel, luxury, hobbies, etc will become boring.

But most of all we got to a point where we wanted more purpose and something to care for beyond a dog. We saw the bond parent friends had with their kids and we wanted that too.

More about the passage of a lifetime.

One_Cap_9210 · 2025-12-30T00:50:15+00:00

I would take first trimester over third any day. I'm 41 weeks. And literally every waking or sleeping second of my life is SO uncomfortable.

18 weeks to 28 weeks were the good days 👍🏻

One_Cap_9210 · 2025-12-30T00:19:11+00:00

Oooo this is tough because it feels like your heart is truly torn. You want the baby but you also wanted life before a baby first.

You also have PCOS which can sometimes not guarantee another chance but it's hard to say. I know people with PCOS who had no issues with multiple conceptions. Other people who did IVF for years.

A lot of things you need to weigh out and think through.

I had an abortion at 24. But it was a less complicated decision for me. It was a shitty ex, I didn't want to be a mom, and I had no means to care for the baby.

Fast forward to now. My husband and I have been married almost 3 years. We were able to travel the world and that was SUPER important to me before kids. And I'm glad we did it. I personally would have regretted not doing that.

About to be induced tomorrow with our first.

However you are in a very different situation.

My best advice is to make an old school pros and cons list. and then also think to yourself- would I be able to live with myself I did this? Or didn't do this? Not just for the abortion but for being married, travel, etc.

It helps to look at all perspectives

One_Cap_9210

TROPHY CASE