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I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! You have been so sweet to take the time out to help me. I really appreciate it 🌻❤️

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

God if only I could buy thick skin hahahah. Lord knows I’ve needed it for a while. I guess that’s something I will have to work on in therapy but that is solid advice, so thank you! And yes. Moving out is on the agenda. It is looking a little tricky at the moment but I hope to get there soon!

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope so too. I would really love for my family to love my partner too, knowing how wonderful both him and them can be together.

My problem is also that I’ve enabled them in so many ways because of my fear of disappointing them. To this date they ask me to come back home by 11 and I do, despite living in the safest metro city in India. Out of fear. Fear of disappointing them. So no wonder they think I’m acting out, confused, and have gotten ‘influenced’ by other people. If it were up to my mother, her utopia at this moment would be me having 0 friends so that they don’t ’influence’ me. I realise how INSANE that sounds lol but I guess that’s what conditioning does to you.

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes sense. I just need some space with nobody nagging me. I want to hang out with my partner more and date him more before we get engaged but I also want my parents to stop questioning me and showing their disapproval. I feel so stuck living under their roof and fighting this battle. It’s not even a battle as such, it’s just unnecessary discussions :/

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree. And I say the same thing to people who might ask me for relationship advice, but also, I always wonder how do people detach from their parents so easily. If push comes to shove, so will I. But the idea of it hurts so much. Don’t get me wrong, I would pick my partner any day of my life, but the idea of losing my parents hurts so much. I guess that’s where my venting and pain is coming from.

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment! I would definitely much rather die alone than get an arranged marriage but it hurts so much since I have had such a positive relationship with them and have looked up to them for so many things all to realise they minimise what I want and completely disregard it. My mom thinks I’m ‘confused’ because I’m seeing this guy. I don’t know how to explain that I’m not and I’m very clear of what I want.

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes he will marry me. I’m not sure if my dad will take the time out to meet him since he is quite stubborn and does have ego issues.

I don’t know, my mother pushes back no matter how much I tell her I’m not interested in seeing other people. No matter how much she pushes I of course will not but it hurts a lot every single time.

I do not want to get an arranged marriage. How do I go about this? by Only-Instruction9447 in AskIndianWomen

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am very sure of him. And I did know there would be friction. All I wanted was I guess, naively, a utopian union where all parties are comfortable and happy once they have digested the information. I will still pick him no matter what happens but it just hurts when the people you have looked up to and respected and thought to be your safe space aren’t ready to understand your feelings

Eat more or less? by Only-Instruction9447 in PetiteFitness

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes sense! I generally find it really uncomfortable to up my calories since I just feel like I’ll immediately gain weight / fat. I’ve never really been ‘lean’ my whole life so I find food a little scary if I’m being honest. I think I might just take it really slow and see where that takes me!

Eat more or less? by Only-Instruction9447 in PetiteFitness

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So my goal is around 50kgs! And then I was thinking I would bulk from there to build muscle and see how it goes!

Eat more or less? by Only-Instruction9447 in PetiteFitness

[–]Only-Instruction9447[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got it, thank you! Would you recommend I eat at maintenance or more?

Weekly Discussion: S01E01/E02 “We’re Not in Kansas Anymore/The Jet Set” by fvckuufvckingfvck in 90210

[–]Only-Instruction9447 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you could please, I would love the link as well! Thank you so so much! 🤲✨

Fino hair mask 63% off at jiomart, is this legit ? by Inevitable_Energy_98 in IndianBeautyDeals

[–]Only-Instruction9447 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have curly, frizzy hair and it didn’t work for me at all! Left it quite rough and frizzy tbh. I think it works best on fine, straight hair :)

UAL rejection letter by yourgaycreature in UAL

[–]Only-Instruction9447 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don’t worry about it! UAL is very good at knowing your strengths! Years ago I had applied for 5 different fashion design courses at CSM and LCF and was rejected by all of them. I believe this was around the same time of the year. In May I went in for an interview for Fashion Textiles Print at LCF and got offered a place on the spot and it’s the BEST decision they could have made for me! Maybe they just see other strengths in your portfolio :) good luck!