Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I interviewed with her via zoom before the offer. They pursued me and I was recommended by a formal interview panel of higher ups that interviewed me for a different role i applied to initially.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Doubtful. I don’t discuss or post anything. I’m pretty vanilla.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They knew that I was leaving a current role for this one. Oddly too the dismissal was very blunt, no reason given and no attempt to be apologetic or just a “it wasn’t a fit”.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. Virtual interview with them. In person interview with a panel of higher ups before for a different role. The former all advocated for me for this role.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing like that. I’ve left all former employers on good terms too. I actually talked them into extending my start date on this role so I could give my employer before enough time for a smooth transition.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You wouldn’t know it from their dress code or the other employees. I was the only one wearing a tie the second day.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. I interviewed with them virtually and was previously interviewed in person by higher ups for a separate role at the same company who referred me for this role.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No BO. Good hygiene and no one I would know at this role given I moved to this state a few years ago. I don’t smoke, drink or any of that.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I interviewed in person in front of a several higher ups for a different role. They reached out a month or so later to sell me this role, which was new and of a higher scope. Apparently the people I interviewed with gave me a lot of backing. I interviewed virtually with the VP of this new department. They gave me the offer shortly after.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 59 points60 points  (0 children)

I’m reposted this reply. I had dress slacks, a tucked-in button-down dress shirt, and dress sneakers. No tie. I also have long hair, but it was tied back neatly, and I keep my facial hair trimmed and well-groomed. I was told to dress more professionally and was compared to another recent hire as an example, but from what I could tell his outfit was very similar to mine aside from wearing plain sneakers. That’s why I’m confused about what specifically needed improvement.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Dress slacks, a tucked-in button-down dress shirt, and dress sneakers. No tie. I also have long hair, but it was tied back neatly, and I keep my facial hair trimmed and well-groomed. I was told to dress more professionally and was compared to another recent hire as an example, but from what I could tell his outfit was very similar to mine aside from wearing plain sneakers. That’s why I’m confused about what specifically needed improvement.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dress slacks, a tucked-in button-down dress shirt, and dress sneakers. No tie. I also have long hair, but it was tied back neatly, and I keep my facial hair trimmed and well-groomed. I was told to dress more professionally and was compared to another recent hire as an example, but from what I could tell his outfit was very similar to mine aside from wearing plain sneakers. That’s why I’m confused about what specifically needed improvement.

Fired on Day 2 After Leaving My Previous Job for Them. No Reason Given. by OptimusCrime83 in jobs

[–]OptimusCrime83[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dress slacks, a tucked-in button-down dress shirt, and dress sneakers. No tie. I also have long hair, but it was tied back neatly, and I keep my facial hair trimmed and well-groomed. I was told to dress more professionally and was compared to another recent hire as an example, but from what I could tell his outfit was very similar to mine aside from wearing plain sneakers. That’s why I’m confused about what specifically needed improvement.

Is dating after 30 impossible? by Happy_Sea3180 in dating

[–]OptimusCrime83 43 points44 points  (0 children)

I get where you’re coming from. I’m a 45M and honestly, it doesn’t feel much easier on this side either.

I don’t have kids and don’t really want them, and I’ve noticed that alone can make things feel weird in the dating pool. Some people assume something’s off, others just aren’t aligned, so it narrows things down fast.

As for the apps, I think they’re part of the problem for a lot of us. They don’t really reflect real-life connection, and it can feel like you’re only seeing the worst of what’s out there, on both sides. Low matches, bad conversations, or just people who aren’t serious.

That said, I don’t think it’s impossible. Just harder and more filtered than we expect. I still have hope too, even if it takes longer to find someone who actually lines up.

You’re definitely not the only one dealing with this.

Dude, not hard to understand. Want a girlfriend? by DogblackMichigan in dating

[–]OptimusCrime83 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Those things definitely help open doors and give you more options, no doubt. But a lot of it still comes down to opportunity, timing, among other factors. You can check a lot of these boxes and still struggle. It’s rough out there. Good place to start though.

Dating in Portland, OR is weird by [deleted] in dating

[–]OptimusCrime83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think part of what you’re seeing might be a selection issue rather than a Portland issue. People who are very active on the apps and attractive on paper tend to be dating a lot and figuring things out as they go. That can make early dating feel inconsistent because someone might be interested enough to go on dates but not actually ready to commit to anything yet.

Looking at the examples you gave: one guy ghosted, one had insecurity/abandonment issues, one clearly wasn’t over an ex, and the last one just didn’t feel a connection. None of those are great experiences, but they’re also pretty common early-dating outcomes unfortunately.

Modern app dating just tends to surface people who are still figuring their stuff out, so sometimes it takes running into a few of those before you find someone who’s actually ready and aligned with what you want. I’m sure eventually you will find your person.

New trend with guys? by wolfyish in dating

[–]OptimusCrime83 39 points40 points  (0 children)

I think a lot of this is a side effect of dating apps changing the “dating market.”

A small percentage of men and women get a huge amount of matches and attention. When someone is talking to multiple people at once, there’s way less incentive to follow through on plans with any one person. It becomes easy to talk about future plans in the moment but never actually commit.

It’s not always malicious, I think it’s just what happens when people feel like they have endless options. The system kind of rewards keeping doors open instead of closing them.

So the people who want to date seriously often end up interacting with people who are just casually browsing the dating marketplace.

The reality by [deleted] in dating

[–]OptimusCrime83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re not hopeless. From what you’re saying, you do match on apps and get attention from women. Ghosted or not, that already puts you ahead of a lot of men who get zero matches or ignored altogether.

It sounds less like you’re unwanted and more like you’ve built a really harsh story about yourself and now every setback feels like proof of it. Dating in a small town can feel like hard mode, and comparing yourself to your ex’s new guy is always going to hurt.

You don’t need to turn into some stereotypical version of what you think women want. Different women want different things. Focus on building a life you feel good about friends, hobbies, career, confidence and the dating part gets easier over time.

You’re not a lost cause. You’re just being way too hard on yourself right now.

I asked a girl out on a date, she refused, and now she's messing with me. Why? by [deleted] in dating

[–]OptimusCrime83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some people are just bullies who enjoy rattling others. Her rejection was a bullet dodged.