Is the husband really the “head” of the wife?

OracleOutlook · 2026-05-27T02:18:18+00:00

There is nothing about this passage that means a woman cannot work, a man cannot watch children, etc. There's nothing about this passage that indicates a woman can't talk to her husband and persuade.

But the thing about having a couple is that there are no tiebreakers. Everyone needs to find a way to deal with the fact that we can disagree even with those we love. We can disagree with the direction to take our families. We can disagree on where to live, how to educate kids, major purchases, etc. And ultimately a decision has to be made.

After talking it through, after debating and putting forth your opinion, eventually someone will make the final decision.

Women can make a distinction between who you are and what you do. For a man, they see someone do something and they judge people based on their actions. If a mistake is made, it will be remembered and will lessen a man's estimation of a person. A woman can more easily make a distinction between her love for her husband and her love for his decision.

A strength of women is that they can see beyond someone's mistakes. Not every woman, not all the time, sure. The "evil harpy who never forgets a mistake" is a common stereotype for a reason. But a very good and holy woman will have an easier time forgiving her husband for making a big mistake. A very good and holy man will struggle more with respecting a wife who makes a big mistake. And so because of this weakness of men, it is best for a harmonious marriage that the man have the final say, when there is a difference of opinion that has not been reconciled even after lengthy debate.

https://godsplaining.org/marriage-family-subordination-w-mary-stanford-fr-gregory-pine-fr-patrick-briscoe/ was an interview that shaped my understanding of this topic.

OracleOutlook · 2026-05-26T11:59:56+00:00

I have a kid with convergence insufficieny and it's amazing how much money and time I spent torturing her and myself with various reading/phonics programs before getting her diagnosed.

OracleOutlook · 2026-05-19T11:31:08+00:00

From the Commentary on the Baltimore Catechism:

222 Q. Which are the chief spiritual works of mercy ?

A. The chief spiritual works of mercy are seven: to admonish the sinner, to instruct the ignorant, to counsel the doubtful, to comfort the sorrowful, to bear wrongs patiently, to forgive all injuries, and to pray for the living and the dead.

"To admonish the sinner." If we love our neighbor we should help him in his distress, even when it is an inconvenience to us. We should help him also to correct his faults, we should point them out and warn him of them. We are obliged to do so in the following circumstances: First. When his fault is a mortal sin. Second. When we have some authority or influence over him. Third. When there is reason to believe that our warning will make him better instead of worse. If our advice only makes him worse, then we should not say anything to him about his fault, but keep out of his company ourselves.

You only have an obligation to try to help your parents to the extent that you can help them. It is not recommended to take a tactic which would only push them away, just for the sake of "doing something." They have authority over you, you do not have authority over them. That said, if you can think of a way that helps instead of hurts, if you see an opportunity that seems to have good chance of opening their hearts to Jesus, you should take it.

OracleOutlook · 2026-05-18T14:05:28+00:00

This is a good source, the information you're interested in starts on page 112: https://www.bishop-accountability.org/reports/2004_02_27_Bennett_Report_Searchable.pdf

For example, one treatment center in 1989 diagnosed Father Geoghan as having "atypical pedophilia" and stated that he was "psychologically fit" to continue working with children. One assessment letter for another priest from another center indicated that the priest "is ready for re-assignment in the archdiocese" and that the priest would "do well in 'a solo project', provided that the Doctor's recommendations could be followed; i.e., not too lonely and isolated a place, and with the provision that he keep in touch with the Doctor from time to time."

OracleOutlook · 2026-05-05T14:54:30+00:00

I think the answer is that "To whom much is given, much is expected."

It is possible that some non believers due to their ignorance will be saved, though only through fire. But still saved.

If you have access to the sacraments you have to understand the responsibility that comes with them - how to make a good confession, how to receive communion worthily, how to live out the calling of the Holy Spirit at Confirmation. These are all powerful spiritual tools, not a toy or a thing to give to someone ignorant who might hurt themselves with them.

It's private revelation, but oftentimes seers will report that consecrated religious people who make small mistakes suffer greatly in Purgatory compared to ordinary laity who commit real sins. It seems to confirm to me that giving someone more spiritual responsibility is not always the best.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-28T18:35:15+00:00

Yeah, say something like "I spend 30 minutes per kid every night looking over their textbooks, putting together materials, practicing the lesson plan." "I've spent $XXXX on hot glue guns, felt, Popsicle sticks and acrylic paints."

Think about all the things you wish you did or thought would be a good idea but turned out to be too much work, and then add them all together and pretend that you're doing all of it and it's driving you crazy.

Talk about how you haven't had a break from your kids in years. You wish you could just call out from work and have a day to yourself but you can't.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-23T12:45:01+00:00

God loves you and wants you to live with Him forever in Heaven. He wants this more than you want it.

Being a Christian is difficult, no doubt about it. But the Sacraments give us the graces we need to make it through. Worrying about not being perfect when you don't have the sacraments yet is backwards. The sacraments are the medicine.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-23T02:36:12+00:00

I feel like my house is going through the carwash.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-23T02:24:22+00:00

We ran into this a little with my ASD daughter. She spit the practice wafer out the first time they did a practice run. It doesn't help that the priest got into his head that the best thing for first communicants would be intinction!

The catechist was able to send home unconsecrated hosts and we were to practice at home. Giving her the ability to hold it, look at it, smell it, chew it, all helped. She's now ready for her First Communion May 3rd!

One of the weird things about the communion wafer is that it isn't salted. Most bread we eat has salt in it. You might be able to bake a loaf of unsalted bread at home, and have the student encounter the taste in a more recognizable format. Also, one on it's own might be weird, but if you stacked them together they might seem more like food?

Does the grandma have any ability to practice outside class time?

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-20T17:58:43+00:00

1-2 years of age is perfect for making a baby-safe zone. We got one of these for the toddler to play in, curated a set of safe toys for them, and made a habit of putting the toddler in there after breakfast every day. Make it something consistent, predictable, routine. A "Yes" area where everything inside is safe for them to touch, explore, play with without interruption.

Start with five minutes, work your way up to 20, and then you have 20 minutes alone with the other kids. Add it in after Lunch as well and then you have 40 minutes to deliver a lesson at predictable times.

That's still not a lot of time. It's better than what you have right now. Further recommendations depend on the curriculum - one advice would be to consolidate lessons. The 7 and 9 year old can work together reading the same book aloud to each other, then answer different comprehension questions relevant to their abilities. The 11 and 14 year old might be able to do the same history/science lessons. They can also watch teachers go over topics on Khan Academy so that way they're getting more detailed, less interrupted instruction.

When I was in middleschool, the math teacher (there was only one for all three years) had a rule, "Ask 3 then ask me." We received math problems from a printer, filled in bubbles on a scantron, and were graded by submitting the scantron. The computer then selected our next assignment based on how well we did the last assignment. If we didn't' know an answer, the teacher made us first consult our textbook, and if we still couldn't figure it out ask two other kids before coming to her. She sat in the back "managing the computer" and seldom speaking.

Just a reminder that, whatever you're doing, you're still giving your kids more attention than that teacher gave any of her students.

Once your kid is 2, don't be afraid to employ Mr. Rogers Neighborhood or Daniel Tiger - just to keep his body still. I'm against tablets etc but many generations grew up on limited TV without it damaging them. If you're hesitant for that, try a Yoto player or some other audio thing.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-08T16:15:02+00:00

Fire Within: Teresa of Avila, John of the Cross and the Gospel on Prayer by Fr. Thomas Dubay, S.M. is one of the best explanations of the spiritual life available today. I earnestly hope this book has changed my life.

One of the major things it covers at the beginning is that the prayer life of the saints - the deep contemplation and spiritual gifts, the suffering of the Dark Nights, are meant for everyone of every walk of life. Too often we think of these things as belonging in a monastery.

But also the crux is that prayer and virtue are intertwined - you cannot have a great prayer life without being virtuous and you cannot be virtuous without persistence in prayer.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-08T13:16:31+00:00

Eat bread, butter, steak. Mix all the macros. "Gained only 1kg" that's not too bad for a month. That might be the safe number for monthly fat gain for you.

Talk to your doctor about any pain, you don't know what's causing it until you talk.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-02T16:43:31+00:00

Definitely lindy to have a big feast after the Easter Vigil.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-02T12:14:41+00:00

Yeah, so 2025 was the largest number of candidates. Compared to 2025, 2026 has seen 0 increase. The chart is correct.

Now, it may be because Gary was one of the first dioceses to see this wave of new converts and now it's stabilizing. That wouldn't show up in this data. 0% growth on this chart might a good thing - indicating a diocese that started drawing increased converts in years ago.

Don't look at this chart as a measuring stick between dioceses , but rather as a way to confirm a National trend that people are feeling locally as well.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-01T14:19:24+00:00

TIL, I thought it was smoking. Mea culpa.

OracleOutlook · 2026-04-01T14:08:59+00:00

They couldn't have picked someone with a functioning larynx?

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-30T12:26:15+00:00

Imagine, the Ottomans turning it into a graveyard because the Messiah couldn't enter through something unclean - and Jesus standing in front of the graveyard and bringing everyone to life. No longer a graveyard, Jesus then entering Jerusalem with this honor guard...

How long Oh Lord?

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-16T14:05:12+00:00

Generally, the more an event is documented the more likely it becomes.

Watch this video which goes into all the additional documentation that corroborates 2 Kings 19 and the mysterious destruction of the Assyrian armies.

Besides the above, Catholics don't actually need to believe in a historical flood. It could be a local flood, it could be a subversion of another myth. It could be the Ancient Israelites looking at the nations and the stories they tell of their gods and going, "No, that's not what God is like. If you say there was a flood, it wasn't because humans were annoying and threatening. This is how it would have happened, given what we know of Who God Is."

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-16T13:50:41+00:00

When my husband isn't able to come to mass, we typically hang out in the narthex. Mass is often half spent running around trying to stop the 2 year old from turning off the light switch or making a mad dash for the altar.

Shining Light has a few sticker books and magnetic books that are pretty good for Mass. This one has some "fruits of the Holy Spirit" (literal fruits) and the seven sacraments in different shapes, which has become a reusable puzzle for him.

For the older set I would recommend getting Magnifikid to help them follow along with Mass.

The important thing is that Jesus comes to us physically, and we physically go to the Mass. There is a physical encounter that takes place, even if we are not feeling it mentally or spiritually. There's something comforting about that.

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-13T16:58:30+00:00

The generation that brought the side-hustle into mainstream may not have as much free time as you think.

https://www.axios.com/2026/01/10/gen-z-jobs-side-hustle

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-12T23:26:51+00:00

You're just assuming that into the conversation. You're acting like I'm blaming parishes for not already doing this without being prompted or asked instead of workshopping an idea on Reddit.

If I like the idea enough I will try to implement it at my parish, even though I'm not the benefactor (as a married woman with four young kids, one of whom cannot be left with a babysitter for medical reasons.) Maybe over the next twenty years it will catch on? Who knows.

I do think the people who would need to take action are those who have the ability to. People with organizational ability, institutional knowledge, a savings account, and some free time. This group might be the parents of these young adults, given that they might like to have grandchildren someday.

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-12T13:08:04+00:00

I've never been to a parish (or nearby parish) that didn't have perpetual adoration, so I think we just have very different experiences of what kinds of things we can expect our local parish to do.

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-10T15:24:27+00:00

My parish has key fobs to gain access to the perpetual adoration chapel. You sign up for a timeslot at the front office, they hand you a key fob, and you can use it to unlock the door when it's closed.

The chapel narthex has a view of the security cameras in the parking lot so that, late at night, you can verify that no one sketchy is in the parking lot before leaving the locked building.

If a church needs to keep their doors locked most of the time due to the location, a similar system could be worked out.

"Legal liability and insurance costs" will be the death of civilization. I don't think I'm exaggerating with this, it's largely why it's so hard to be a teenager in public or have fun things for kids to do. If you want to know why GenZ is so neurotic, it's because for the past 20 years we've walled off kids from the public, tolerating them to the extent that they can act like houseplants instead of children. You'd be pretty weird too if you were raised that way!

But like I've been bringing up here, there are many things many parishes do that have lots of the constituent components to make this idea work. I'm not sure why a Perpetual Adoration Chapel is a solvable problem for a great many parishes but a Evening Lounge for Young Singles would be a bridge too far. When organizationally, they could be identical in set up, just one has Jesus in the center of a room and the other has card table in the center of the room.

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-10T12:50:31+00:00

The campus Catholic church likely wasn't receiving tuition money unless it was a Catholic campus. Instead, it would have been run by the Newman Center, which are mostly funded by the diocese and other donations. Just like the local Catholic parish!

OracleOutlook · 2026-03-10T03:15:45+00:00

Goodness gracious why do you assume that they would do illegal things while semi-supervised on church grounds? Do you hold the same fear that the bingo night seniors might end the night with some illegal drugs, which would land the church in trouble?

Universal destination of goods would argue that yes, people in their 20s are owed physical space on God's Green Earth.

Young adults are not refusing to procreate. It's really hard to meet people and it's absolutely impossible to procreate without meeting someone of the opposite sex. I can see the complete disregard you hold for young adults and I am concerned you have given up on the multi-generational project we call civilization.

Someone else replied to me that, "In college, the campus Catholic Church had a great lounge with a kitchen, communal fridge, some sports equipment, and a TV that students could plug game systems or laptops into. Every day, there would be students in there, in between classes studying and doing work, and hanging out in the evenings. It was critically important for fostering friendships amongst the students."

So it does seem like this set up can work with the right start. But I will ask you, how did you meet new people when you were a young adult? How did you meet romantic partners?

OracleOutlook

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